get you feet off my furniture!

@jillhill (37354)
United States
May 13, 2008 3:45pm CST
I had a friend stop by and visit yesterday and she left her shoes on..which I understand as she has to wear orthotics in them because of bad feet.....well less then two weeks ago I got a new coffee table and end table. We were sitting in the living room visiting and she kept putting her feet up on my new table!! I wouldn't put my feet on anyone's table but to do it with her shoes on really got on my nerves! If it had been one of the kids I would have probably said something....but being I don't get to see this gal alot I just cringed and tried not to seem upset. I realize it's just a coffee table but I have a pottery basket on it that my daughter got me in Italy, and I didn't want that pushed off either. Would you have said something? Or would you do like I did and just grin and bear it?
9 people like this
24 responses
@34momma (13882)
• United States
13 May 08
you are better then me because i would have told her to take her feet down. wow that is so not cool to assume that it's ok to do what you do at home in someone else's house. you don't have to grin and bear it and you don't have to be mean either. you can nicely let her know that you prefer if she didn't put her feet on your table!
@34momma (13882)
• United States
13 May 08
you shouldn't be. if you don't stand for something then you will fall for anything. and you don't have to be mean or nasty just say oh girl please don't put your feet on my table i just got it
1 person likes this
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
13 May 08
I am such a woosy when it comes to stuff like this!
2 people like this
• China
14 May 08
Of course, u can say something! It is so rude to put feet on the coffee table. My mom never allow my put my feet on the talbe. She always says that it is not decent for a girl to do such kind of things. So I keep it in my mind. If u do not want to others put their feet on ur coffee table. Do not grin & bear it, just tell him/her. I remember that once there was a classmate who lived in the next door of our dorm came to us and she sat on my bed and then put her feet on my bed. I did not want to have my bed treated like that. so I asked her not to do that in a polite way and she agreed with it. However, my word did not influence our friendship and we went on our chatting happily. TELL HER WHAT U THINK AND SHE WILL UNDERSTAND IT!
1 person likes this
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
14 May 08
I will if she does it again instead of fuming about it like I was after she left. It would be better for both of us!
@vanities (11395)
• Davao, Philippines
13 May 08
i dont know what to say on that event it never happened to me with my friends...i wont say anything...i just let her feel at home..and if ever in the event that a vase or a pottery basket that will fall and break then it is my assumption that the friend will replace it..its good that you just grin and very calm to your friend...
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
14 May 08
I just let it slide this time but I not sure I can if it happens again....a grown woman should know better.
1 person likes this
@foxyfire33 (10005)
• United States
13 May 08
I would have done the same as you...grin and bear it and then come here to vent LOL. Like so many of the others said, in theory you should have politely said something. But I can not give advice I know I would not have taken myself! I did just have a thought on something I may have been brave enough to do...before she visits agin find a ratty looking throw pillow. When she puts her feet on your coffee table you can mention that it can't be comfortable and that you'll get her a pillow. That will possibly be enough to get her feet on the floor but if not you bring out the ratty pillow and explain that you only keep 'this old thing' around to protect your brand new furniture. Then she'll have to choose between having her feet on the floor or on the ratty pillow...either way your table will be safe.
1 person likes this
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
13 May 08
Good idea!
1 person likes this
@carolscash (9492)
• United States
13 May 08
If there wasn't any way that she was actually going to hurt the table I would not have said anything. I sit with my feet on our coffee table all of the time so I would not have said anything. I think that you have to pick your battles with your kids and your friends. I don't like to have a house that can't be "lived in" and I would never expect a guest to remove their shoes in my home.
1 person likes this
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
13 May 08
I don't think shoes on furniture is appropriate....If it does happen again I will probably gently remind her to take her feet off...
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
13 May 08
I have quit being a wuss and I would say sorry but I do not allow anyone to put their feet on my new table, not evern my husband. that should be kind enought to get the message across without hurting any feelings. You have to tell this kind of person as otherwise they will just keep doing it.
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
13 May 08
I realize I should have said something now...as I have been stewing about it and I don't want to wreck a friendship over something like this.....when she comes again and if she does do it I will tell her....gently!
1 person likes this
@carolbee (16230)
• United States
14 May 08
I wouldn't have said anything although I would have been angry. I wouldn't have wanted to make the friend feel bad so my lips would have been sealed. It's called respecting a friend's property, new or old. I've never done that in anyone's house. It's the kind of thing you have to grin and bear even though it's terribly annoying. Hopefully she didn't scratch your new coffee table.
@carolbee (16230)
• United States
15 May 08
It would have bothered me also. I get a little miffed when people don't respect what is in our house.
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
14 May 08
She didn't scratch it...and I should have said something..it just ate away at me all night after she left!
@crazynurse (7482)
• United States
26 Jun 08
Wow Jill, you have more restraint than I would have had in the same situation. I'm afraid I would have perhaps gone and gotten an ottoman, box or something then put a pillow on it then casually slid it near her and said, "Here is something softer for you to rest your feet on." Isn't it odd how some people just don't seem to respect nice things? I would never think of putting my feet on someone's furniture. If you have children, you could also have said, "Please don't let my children see your feet on the table, I've been coaching them to not put their feet on the table."
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
26 Jun 08
That is a very good idea! If the grandkids were around I could say that! There will be no next time in this situation.....I'm ready to say something if it even attempts to come up.
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
21 Jun 08
i would have told her to put her feet down on the floor. if i'm in a friends house, i seldom do that. i rarely do that actually. i think its not a good manner to put your feet over a table when you're at other people's house. if its a relative's house or a friends house, it would still depend on how close your relationship is and how comfortable you are with each other. i mean, if i'm in my bestfriend's house, i can put my feet up her table and if she tells me not too, i wouldn't be offended and i would put down my feet. i hope you get what i mean jill.
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
21 Jun 08
I do get what you mean...I should have said something at the time.
@babykeka80 (2084)
• United States
13 May 08
I probably wouldnt have said anything but always would have in the back of my mind how rude it is. I can't even imagine going to someone's house and putting my feet on their furniture. I sometimes don't even like to wear my shoes into other peoples houses if their carpet looks like it has just been cleaned or something. That is just unheard of being that an adult did it.
1 person likes this
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
13 May 08
Yes....you are right. I don't wear my shoes in anyone else's house and certainly wouldn't put my feet up on a coffee table! THanks for posting!
1 person likes this
@ellie333 (21016)
13 May 08
You are just so nice there is no way I would not have said something regardless of whether it was a new table or not it was very rude and my house my rules and to lead by example as I would have told the kids off I would have had to say (very politely of course LOL) to her about it. I realise that you hadn't seen her for a while but I would have said something along the lines of I have just recently decorated and these tables are new too, do you like them, oh and would you do me a favour and keep your feet off them please. I tell the kids so it wouldn't look too good if they saw you do it eh! and smiled through a grimace LOL. Ellie :D
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
13 May 08
I just redid the dining room and you can't help but notice which she did....the living room is connected by an archway to the dining room so I freshened it up with new tables....and she commented on them! That's what I don't understand. She said how nice it looked them put her sneakers up on my brand new coffee table! LOL...I will next time she comes over though....I don't want to stew over it and maybe if I just remind her she will understand.
1 person likes this
@kezabelle (2974)
13 May 08
I woud have said something, I wouldnt treat other peoples furniture like that and I sure as hell wont let them treat mine like it. Its rude it really is, I insist on shoes off in my house aswell I dont wear mine round the house and friends and family dont need to either they can go tread all their muck into their own carpet if that keeps them happy but they arent doing it here.
1 person likes this
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
13 May 08
I think I need some of your attitude instead of just sitting there trying not to get angry!
1 person likes this
• United States
13 May 08
I definatley would have said something to her. I can understand that maybe will bad feet she may need to keep them elevated but to put them up on someones furniture is a bit rude, regardless if they are your friend or not. If this happens again, maybe kindly suggest that you have a stool she can use if she needs to put her feet up. Saying it this way wont leave her on the defensive. Personally tho lol if it were me i would have said, "take ur shoes off at the door and the feet belong on the floor"
1 person likes this
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
13 May 08
That is a good one!
@spalladino (17891)
• United States
13 May 08
I wouldn't have said anything either and prayed for my husband to walk in. He'd tell the Pope to get his feet off the coffee table.
1 person likes this
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
13 May 08
Aw...my son is like that...and he isn't very diplomatic when he does it either! LOL
1 person likes this
@lingli_78 (12822)
• Australia
14 May 08
well, i will definitely say something if i were in your position... it is very rude of your friend to do that... i will tell her nicely to get her feet off my furniture or i will get her a stool to put her feet up... you are already kind enough to let her put her shoes on and enter your house... i won't let my guest do that in my house as well no matter how close i am to the person... take care and have a nice day...
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
14 May 08
THanks for commenting!
@SViswan (12051)
• India
14 May 08
It depends on who it was and if my husband was around. I don't like people putting their feet up on my table...I don't even like my husband doing it....but he gets to do it because it's his home too. I usually tell them nicely if someone does it 'If you don't mind...could you please take your feet off my table?' and give some reason for it. But if my husband's around, I grin and bear with it...because he thinks it's rude to say such things to someone who is a guest. I can see his point but guests need to have some manners too.
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
14 May 08
I should have said something....next time I will!
@ShepherdSpy (8544)
• Omagh, Northern Ireland
14 May 08
-And quite right You'd be to say so! I'm not the most houseproud person..(She'd have been lucky finding a space to put her feet up on MY coffee table!,But I'd have the manners to ASK when visiting a Friend if they'd Mind if I put my feet up on the furniture..
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
14 May 08
I should have said something. Or like you said she could have asked!
• India
14 May 08
You have ever right to be upset. I would have politely told my friend to put her feet down ! You showed more than fair amount of tolerance, I would say..This reminds me of the time when I was in college, we had a great group of friends of about 8 people, all who had studied from kindergarten to high school together..so most of us were family friends, popping in and out of each other's homes whenever...One of the guys had this irritating habit of walking through the main room to the bedroom and throughout the house without taking off his shoes, now as long as he did it in his own home it was ok, but he didn't bother at somebody else's house too ! Once when he came to my place, my dad saw him with his shoes on and in a stern voice pointed out to him the door where you were supposed to leave the shoes before entering, I was terribly embarrassed (teenage years are something else, your friends can do no wrong !!!) but he got the point.
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
14 May 08
Thanks for sharing! I know if it happens again I will say something!
@ReoTwo (194)
14 May 08
First of all, I can't (even when I was younger)imagine having a friend that didn't know that you're not supposed to put your feet up on somebody's new or used table. But if I did, I would have no qualms about speaking up about what's mine. I would put it in a nice or jokingly way. Whichever way I would feel would work with this particular person. Knowing me, I'd probaby just say, "Girl get your feet off my table!" I know that there or times in life when you feel like you have to or should grin and bear it. But just sitting and watching someone disrespect or do something in your own home which you may not even do is not one of those times.
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
14 May 08
I really should have said something...it chewed at me all night after she left! If there is a next time I will say something instead of being upset and pouting about it later!
@reene0225 (351)
• United States
16 May 08
I would be so ticked off. I probably would have been like oh do you like my new coffee table and end tables? They are nice and say you paid like an outrageous amount for them. Then she'd get her feet off of them and fast. Guarantee she'll never do it again either. People need to have respect for others stuff. Especially if she doesn't get to see you very often.
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
21 Jun 08
You are right but that seems to be a lost art..respecting other's things...if she does it again I'll certainly bring it to her attention.