Do you let your children see you cry???
By goodhappens
@goodhappens (671)
United States
May 17, 2008 12:17am CST
For the most part I would have to say no, but I am having to go thru some real thought emotional issues this weekend and I was in the backyard crying when they came home. I felt real bad that I hadnt stopped before they got home, so I dried my eyes, came in and apologized to them all letting them know how much I love them all and this has nothing to do with them but I loved them and I have to go through this to help someone. They are so cool, each gave me a big hug, then offered to do what ever was needed for them to help. I just wanted to say awwwww, but their boys and well I would have got the gezzzz mom we're trying to be nice here.
How about you, do you cry in front of your kids, or do you usually try to hide it?
6 people like this
14 responses
@ladysakurax (1161)
• Canada
17 May 08
When I was small, my mom would cry sometimes and it's hard to hide it in a small appartment. I think there is nothing wrong with it. I don't know why parents would hide it from their children. I want to know when my mom or dad is feeling sad so i can cheer up. When something happens, i remember bringing them some sweets or stuff like that. I do ask them what hapenned and they just say that it's too complicated for my age. So I try to behave and be a good girl to not make things more complicated.
2 people like this
@goodhappens (671)
• United States
17 May 08
that is good, it makes it easier when the kids are being good when they know their parents arent doing so well
2 people like this
@goodhappens (671)
• United States
17 May 08
i felt I should let them know it had nothing to do with them, I loved them but was just dealing with some hard stuff now.
1 person likes this
@tarams98020 (170)
• United States
17 May 08
I do let my children see me cry only sometimes though. When it is my situation I try to hide it..but like when my daughter was in the hospital in March we all cried. It was the first night that she wasnt here and my fiance went into her room to pick up a few things and he started to cry because he sometimes tucks her in. Well, I heard him and the boys did too...so we all hugged and cried all together.
1 person likes this
@goodhappens (671)
• United States
17 May 08
That is good, especially for your boys to know it is ok to cry.
1 person likes this
@TerryZ (22076)
• United States
17 May 08
Hi my friend Im sorry your going thru some emotional times. I dont like to cry in front of anyone. But sometimes it just cant be helped. Like last week the day before I went in the hospital for my surgery I was over my aunts house and when I was leaving I started to cry. I guess I was just nervous. Sometimes kids can make you feel better. They just have that innocense about them. Hope your feeling better.
@goodhappens (671)
• United States
17 May 08
hello my friend, and thank you, today was much easier and I do feel better, you are so right about the innocence of a child making life feel so much better, I think I was more focused today on the outcome of what this will bring and it helped alot. Just a few more days to go and I can be done. Thank you again
1 person likes this
@jcj_111776 (3216)
• Philippines
17 May 08
I have only one child and he's 5 years old. There was a time that I couldn't stop the tears from falling and he saw it. He was so young at that time that trying to make an explanation to him won't work. What he did though surprised me and made me want to cry more. My son didn't say anything. He just looked at me and touched my face and the tears.
So, I just smiled and wiped my tears and gave him a big warm hug.
But now, that he's a little older, I do hide my tears. I don't want to worry him or make him upset.
But now, that he's a little older, I do hide my tears. I don't want to worry him or make him upset.1 person likes this
@goodhappens (671)
• United States
17 May 08
I understand that one, none of us want to upset our children if we dont need to :)
1 person likes this
@sturner03 (326)
• United States
17 May 08
I think sometimes its good. You don't want to completly shelter your children from emotions. If Mommy always hides it when she cries then the kids are going to think it's not ok to cry in front of people. I do once in a while cry in front of them. It's healthy for them to see some of all emotions.
1 person likes this
@goodhappens (671)
• United States
17 May 08
Im glad to see that others feel the same way I do, thanks for sharing
1 person likes this
@idowrite72 (2213)
• United States
19 May 08
I see nothing wrong with crying in front of my children and did it when I did it. They are grown now and each of us cries when we need to. I think that crying is a good way of showing emotions that is something that should be expressed whether it is a man or a woman. I know that many feel that men shouldn't cry, but I think that only a REAL man can cry and not feel badly about it. Personally, I am a very emotional person and many things affect my emotions and the times I might cry. I cry often at movies and television shows can make me cry, as well. Things of beauty can make me cry and my oldest daughter used to pride herself in finding greeting cards that would cause me to tear up and cry at any occasion.
@goodhappens (671)
• United States
19 May 08
happy good crying is good too, tho I cant see my boys doing that. but I believe they have learned it is ok to cry when their feelings are of such, thank you for sharing, and your daughter is a very sweet one :)
@joimarquez (1836)
• United States
17 May 08
i dont realy intend to let them see me cry but sometimes when they know im going through something they would just go to my room and hug me...like my eldest when im crying he would always wanna lay down in the bed with me...soemtimes he doesnt say anything but thats his way of letting me know he is there for me...my kids are 11 and 10 years.
@goodhappens (671)
• United States
17 May 08
That is so sweet, young ones have such loving hearts
1 person likes this
@chrislotz (8137)
• Canada
26 Jul 08
I don't hide it from my kids when I am upset enough that it makes me cry. I may not tell them what the problem is or why I am crying but I also don't hide it from them. I want my kids to know I have feelings too and that it is okay to cry. Now my kids are grown up and they are sentimental and sensitive to others needs and know it is okay to cry. They now know it is okay to cry and show their emotions to their spouses. They don't have kids of their own yet, but when they do I hope they teach them it is okay to cry too.
@tessah (6617)
• United States
18 May 08
i dont think there is anything wrong with yer kids seeing you cry. it shows that yer human, have feelings, that they can be hurt.. same as they. if you make a habit of hiding yer feelings and surpressing them around yer children.. they will make a habit of doing the same. children usually do what they are shown by example, and if they see you stone-cold and heartless out of yer desires to not upset them by showing yer emotions.. they will begin to think that feeling/showing sadness or grief.. is a bad thing.. which will only lead to alot more problems.. and will leave you with alot of "you dont understand how i feel!!" types of conversations with yer kids.
@goodhappens (671)
• United States
19 May 08
you are so right on that one, and it was shown to me tonight when my 13yr old girlfriend had to go to youthville, he came home after she left and asked if he could shut my bedroom door and talk with me, he just starting crying his little eyes out and asked if he was wrong for crying, I reminded me he saw me cry quite a few times this weekend and it just shows we have a heart and its ok to show our emotions when we feel stong about them, he got his tears out, said he felt better but knows he will miss her but was now ready for bed. I was very proud of him, and happy that he felt comfortable enough to share that with me.
@thebeaddoodler (4262)
• Lubbock, Texas
17 May 08
It really depends on the situation. All my children are grown now and I still hate for them to see me cry, but if your child never sees you cry he/she may get the feeling that it's shameful to cry or worse yet they may regard you as someone with less feeling than they have. That can either frighten them, or make them cold toward you. So yes, sometimes it's ok for the children to see you cry. They need to know that Mom is a fully human person with a full range of emotions.
@goodhappens (671)
• United States
17 May 08
that is a very good point, and lord knows mom's are definately human, hehe
1 person likes this
@towfay1 (43)
•
19 May 08
Hello, goodhappens
Yes I do cry in front of my child. I have never wanted to hide that human feelings are valid. I love my child and tell her everyday. I think we parents can be to stiff, "never let them see you sweat"(or be human). Sometimes you just need to feel. "I love you and I need a minute or twenty", or "I love you and I need to be in my heart or head", and when you get yourself together your child can see an emotional momment can be helpful, especially when you still use your parental superpowers.
