If a friend was molested but declined to report it, will you keep quiet too?

@Abbyey (760)
Philippines
May 29, 2008 2:24am CST
I want to hear your opinions so that i would know what actions i should take. A friend of mine was molested and she trusted me enough to let me know what happened. I was speechless at first when she finished telling me the events but afterwards she said that she will not report it. She told me not to tell anyone about it. I told her to report it to the police but she declined. I told her to speak with her family as well but she declined too. She said that it was her fault because she agreed to have a date with the guy. I am the only one who knew what has happened. So whenever we are together with friends I can see her not being her old self. She became quiet and she always look to a far distance. I'm starting to worry. I know she has a strong faith but still I fear that she might think of hurting herself. If you are in my situation will you start telling people that you think can Help? Please let me know your opinions. Thanks
2 people like this
6 responses
@twoey68 (13651)
• United States
17 Aug 09
Normally I'd say you need to respect your friends decision but in this case it really needs to be reported. A lot of times when it's not reported the molester gets more confident and goes after other victims. If you can't get her to report it then you need to either talk to one of her family members you feel comfortable with or report it. She also needs to talk to someone so she can work through it. [b]~~AT PEACE WITHIN~~ **STAND STRONG IN YOUR BELIEFS**[/b]
• Mauritius
29 May 08
i think you must talk to her and her family first because as a friend you should not report it to the police at the first step itself. you are the one whom she needs the most and she has trusted you and told you everything , you must think before taking every step because its a very delicate situation.
@excellence7 (3496)
• Mauritius
29 May 08
Its too much of a delicate issue, instead of thinking of reporting to the police, I would advise you to convince her to talk to her family first, convince her, don't simply do so without her knowing it..Right now she needs you, don't forget, you are the only one to whom she has confided in..So, make sure that you don't force her to lose you..
@rirbry (353)
• Malaysia
29 May 08
I think i will make a report to the police!! the truth must be revealed!! even it was your friends fault but before the guy molested other girl i think better you report it
@lilaclady (28236)
• Australia
29 May 08
I think you have to put yourself in your friends place...it is your friends call, I would never a trust a friend again if they did something against my wishes...I don't think you should go against your friend.
@rpegan (598)
• United States
29 May 08
It's not really your place to report it, but you might need to. She SHOULD do it herself because it will only cause more damage the longer she lets the situation control her life and her actions. If at all possible, she needs to be the one to do it. However, with molestation cases, it's very rarely just one victim. Your friend needs to realize that she probably won't be the last. If she doesn't report this individual, others will probably go through the same pain that she is experiencing. For this reason, you need to report it if she doesn't.