Do you have shared parenting?

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Alright, 9 years ago I entered into a shared parenting plan with my ex-husband. After the first year it started going well. He seemed to improve so much as a parent. I made me so happy that we got divorced, it was like I was enabling him to be an ok dad instead of a great dad! The next 4 years went great, we did holidays together, talked, and a lot of things that we did while we were married, nothing was romantic in any way though. Then he got engaged and I thought it was wonderful. Slowly things started going bad. As soon as they got married it got really bad. She changed the kids doctors and I was unware until my son was sick and I called to make an appointment. I was told that the children were pulled out a few months ago from the practice. The our youngest came home with bruises on his arms that looked like fingerprints. I didn't want him to make stuff up so I asked him if he fell off his bike. He acted as though I asked him what he had for breakfast and state "stepmom's name grabbed me and shook me because I tripped over the sweeper and it hit her foot". Mad as hell I called him and he said "oh not my wife she's the greatest person in the world". I hired an attorney and spend almost $20,000 to end this shared parenting plan. Things of course got worse: she wouldn't allow my son to take his asthma medicine, she called the doctors and told them I was making my children sick, she refused to let them have medical treatment, the list goes on and on. The courts heard all of this, they made us hire an attorney for the children. The attorney filed a report with the court about the issues I had and validated them. This went on for almost 2 years. The courts would not terminate the shared parenting plan. The ex and his wife violate every court order (they issued orders such as no one was allowed to hit the children, the children had to take all medication given by the doctor, so on and so forth) and every time I file a motion they just rewrite the order because "he must not have understood the order". We have a son together that has major issues ADHD, autism, ODD, and other things. My new husband pays for all of his medical care because my ex won't and I am afraid that if I go back to court nothing will happen any way so what's the point. I have known a lot of people that have done shared parenting and only a few work out good. Do you have this same problem or do you know someone that does? I encourage everyone I know not to do shared parenting because you can't seem to change the plan if it goes wrong. I have heard that a lot of courts are making parents do shared parenting leaving them with no choice in the custody of their children. I would love to hear what you have to say about this. Thanks for the opinions and any advise you may have.