Why can't he just be happy for me..

@chechuva (1275)
Philippines
June 2, 2008 6:58am CST
for a long time i haven't talk with my special man but at last we talked over yahoo messenger. today is my birthday! and im really happy when i woke up. i got lots of messages from my friends. my father even send 6 messages just to wish me a happy birthday! and my mom made me smile on her greeting! i logged on to my YM and suddenly my long lost boyfriend buzz me on my messenger. actually he forgot that its my birthday today.. so i just reminded him. and so he greeted me. but he was not really happy giving his greetings.. then after i asked him his situation in Dubai, he just said that he have lots of problems.. so i tried to listen and understand what he was trying to say. of course i love him, i gave him encouragement and support. but he thought i didn't understand him and said that i just live it to him alone. and he just said he's not in the mood to talk and bid goodbye... am i selfish now that im angry at him? he didn't even care that its my birthday... i don't know... im just sad right now... how i really wish to have and end this day as my HAPPY birthday....
8 people like this
31 responses
juliefaye
@juliefaye (1214)
• Philippines
2 Jun 08
Before anything else, HAPPY BIRTHDAY, CHECHUVA! Well, I still remember your previous post about this BF. If i were on your shoe, I will put an end on heartaches that this man is always giving me. Life is short, we should not waste it on things that makes our life even shorter. Don't let this man ruin your day my dear.. and your life as well!
2 people like this
jessa
@jesbellaine (4139)
• Philippines
8 Jun 08
I agree with you JulieFaye! I have seen that previous post as well. Like I told you, you deserve a man who would love you as you and willing to share his life with you... Maybe it is time to let him go for good... But since it is your birthday, please go out with your family and friends then let them give you the best time of your life! There are lots of peeps who loves you.... you know... Cheers!
checapricorn
@checapricorn (16061)
• United States
2 Jun 08
wow! I don't know now what to say chechuva, maybe you need to let him go and figure out if ever he can take it! It seems that he has a problem and he doesn't even bother to tell you, he just make you worry more by being very secretive and it sounds that he didn't ask how are you and all!
1 person likes this
checapricorn
@checapricorn (16061)
• United States
3 Jun 08
If that is constant, maybe he is really keeping you for that purposes! For me, you know, it is better to let him realize where are you in his life by telling him to separate ways this time and who knows, when you are really destined to be, your path will surely meet/crossed again!
chechuva
@chechuva (1275)
• Philippines
3 Jun 08
you know he send me a message again last night, after 3 hours when we chatted. he actually said sorry but in the end of his message, he asked me to do a favor for him.. i almost throw my cellphone in my anger! he just remember me because he needed something!
suspenseful
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
3 Jun 08
He might be having problems over there, very serious problems, so you being disappointed that he is not happy it is your birthday and forgetting it seems rather selfish. After all, he might be getting shot at. There might be terrorists all around. And since he is probably Roman Catholic and most of the people in Dubai are Muslims there might be a lot of persecution and opposition. Now if he were in some place like maybe Paris or Rome, then you would have a right to be angry, but consider where he is, a Roman Catholic in a Muslim country where there are terrorists lurking about. And if he is working, he might not have time to just chat.
1 person likes this
Pose123
@Pose123 (21635)
• Canada
3 Jun 08
Hi chechuva, First of all I want to say a happy belated birthday. Sorry I didn't see this discussion yesterday. We all get a little angry sometimes, it will pass. It's too bad that your boyfriend wasn't able to be happy for you but maybe he just has so many problems that it's all he is thinking about. Don't feel you are being selfish because you wanted to be happy on your birthday, that only natural. Hopefully things will improve and you will talk with him again shortly and this time you will both be happy. Blessings.
1 person likes this
chechuva
@chechuva (1275)
• Philippines
4 Jun 08
actually he send me messages again after 2 hours. he said sorry but in the end of his message he just want to ask a favor... that message made me sadder..
dhangski
@dhangski (3194)
• Philippines
2 Jun 08
Cheer up my friend it's your birthday! Don't let this situation ruin your special day. I guess you just have to understand your boyfriend. Maybe he has been having pressures at work. At least you tried to listen at him. Try to talk things out when he goes online again. You have other reasons to celebrate, your friends greeted you, your dad and mom greeted you, and that should make you happy. Have a happy birthday Chechuva, may you have more birthdays and blessings to come.
1 person likes this
mentalward
@mentalward (14691)
• United States
2 Jun 08
Happy Birthday, chechuva! You have many friends here so stay awhile and enjoy your special day. Your boyfriend sounds like he is being the selfish one right now and not thinking about you. I know that can hurt a lot, but you have to remember that you have friends and family who want you to be happy. You are not being selfish. You tried to listen to him. You can replace your boyfriend, but you cannot replace your friends or family. They care about you a lot. This is something I read awhile ago and it has always stayed with me, "If someone makes you cry, he is not worth your tears." We all care about you here at myLot as well. That is something that you should always remember. I am glad you shared this with us. It gives us a chance to at least wish you a happy birthday! Come on, now, cheer up and smile! It's your birthday!
1 person likes this
chechuva
@chechuva (1275)
• Philippines
2 Jun 08
thanks! that's very nice of you to cheer me up.. i can't thank you enough for giving comfort to me right now.. yes i have lots of friends here in mylot, like you, that makes me happy.. honestly i can't say this to my family. i know they'll get mad at him. i just thought of venting all my feelings here right now.. thanks again... have a nice day!
bellaofchaos
@bellaofchaos (11538)
• United States
7 Jun 08
Sorry this is kinda of late but it was you're day and you tried your best to understand and be supportive of his situation. Unfortunately he feels the way he does. I would just let it go and don't let it have an effect. Take care and I hope you had a good birthday otherwise.
madlees
@madlees (1377)
• India
2 Jun 08
Happy Birthday dear Chechuva, It is wrong for you to feel happy on your birthday. As you said maybe your friend was under too much stress, he just couldn't be happy for you. Leave it at that and just enjoy your birthday dear. It is allright, nothing will change and some people cannot be changed. Ok all the best wishes for your happy birthday and have you a party tonight? Enjoy!!
1 person likes this
HULYO
@julyteen (13252)
• Davao, Philippines
21 Jun 08
don't let someone destroy your special day. it is but normal to feel that way, for of course, he ought to know that it is your birthday. but i think you just have to understand him. if you choose to love him then you have to accept him, his whole being. what you're feeling right now is just one of the challenges you must face in a long distance kind of relationship. it is your choice whether or not to give up.
travibabiesgirl
@travibabiesgirl (1690)
• United States
2 Jun 08
You have a right to be hurt by your boyfriends words. But don't let that have the power over you to ruin your day. Maybe he just felt really bad because he forgot, maybe he is having some major issues where he is at. If he is this negative during everything in your life then I would say get rid of him for he will make you miserable. If this is just an out of the blue once in a while because he really is having a major problem thing then just be patient the next time you chat it will be better. Happy birthday to you!!!!
1 person likes this
ANTIQUELADY
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
7 Jun 08
happy birthday. i wouldn't sweat the small stuff because i think that's the category he's in.
nupats
@nupats (3564)
• India
3 Jun 08
Many Happy Returns of the day..u said long lost boy friend so might as well tell him to get lost..if he doesnt remember ur birthday, if he is more involved in himself and his own problem...then i wud have bid him goodbye long back...everyone has problems but no need to cry abt it always this is exactly wt ur BF seems to b doing...U go ahead and party and have a blst with ur friends...It is UR Day Enjoy It..dont let anyone ruin it...Keep smilimg...God Bless!!
vermillion
@vermillion (887)
• Philippines
2 Jun 08
I've been in that sort of situation many times before. I've been ignored by my man in my happy days, even though i supported him in his and it's quite unfair. I've been sacrificing my happiness, and even when i was the one with the problems, i'd forget it all just to greet him and ask hows he doing and stuff like that. It's always him first before my self. Has he been doing this since you were together? Or it's just this one time? cause if it is just this once then maybe his problems are worse than you think. Give him time. I'm sure if he has realized that he should've been happy for you then forgive him. If not, well you can't possibly stick beside someone who's been dragging you down and making you unhappy.Think about it(^^,)
1 person likes this
bluebells_mercury
@bluebells_mercury (64)
• India
3 Jun 08
birthdays are most special.he should have remembered it no matter what.but anyways try to forget and forgive things. only then life keeps going.
subha12
@subha12 (18441)
• India
3 Jun 08
actually i think i can't comment more on this. i should have known the total scenario. but when its yours birthday, he should have whole hartedly wished you. whatever may be his problem. also can't he discuss the problem with his GF? may be all things you can't solve, but it makes heart light.
kun2349
@kun2349 (23381)
• Singapore
3 Jun 08
Happy birthday to u!! NO matter how busy or how much problems he have on hand, he should not forget about your birthday.. If u really mean anyhting to u, he should and will wish u and remember it's your birthday.. He should not have any excuse to forget..
cassie_502
@cassie_502 (141)
• China
3 Jun 08
Hi, chechuva, happy birthday to you! to the honest, i don't know how to comfort you, i can understand your feeling not get your greeting from your boyfriend. maybe he is really in bad situation and too busy with her problems to forget your birthday. so please not think too much. hope you will have a happy day today, anywhy ,today is your birthday.many of your friends are with you.
Samanthavv
@Samanthavv (1380)
• United States
3 Jun 08
Don't you love it when bitter exes just drop in to say hello at all the wrong times? Sorry, I'm being sarcastic, but I've been there and I know how it is. If I were you I would just ignore it and don't even worry about the butthead. Just put your chin up and think about the people who do love and care about you. HAPPY BIRTHDAY GIRLY!
roanne05
@roanne05 (1290)
• Oman
3 Jun 08
maybe he has lots of problems...just don't mind him...it is your birthday..HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Patience7777
@Patience7777 (17)
• United States
3 Jun 08
U knw what no matter put more love in yourself no matter no matter what the reason neva let knw one have control of ur mood on ur special day. HAPPY BIRTHDAY