How fair is Welfare?

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I do not know about the welfare systems in other countries, but I do know from others here in the U.S. how backwards it can be. I know there are people who abuse the system to keep from earning a living the old fashioned way, but there also are people who even while working need a little extra help. ANd I know someone who earned $50 more than the cut off limit (and that was based on gross income not after taxes) and so the foodstamp office cut off her EBT completely. Here are other stories about how twisted it can be and you can believe it or not, but this has happened to people in my family so this is why my father made it a point to raise us without getting aid of any type: My family: when my father was disabled and in the dead of winter the pipes froze in our house and exploded. Well, his disability compensation was still in process and the pantry was bare and things were being shut off right and left because of the lack of income. My mother suggested to approach the welfare office for some assistance until it all worked out. He kept telling her they would not help out. Well, finally he took her downtown to apply. And he stayed outside while she spoke with the casworker. The woman basically told mom that in order to help our family out mom would have to declare my father abandoning his family and then the bills would get paid, pipes fixed, and definitely provide enough money for food for us. My mother told them to go straight to H-E- double hockey sticks (LOL) because all she was asking for was help for a couple of months. Needless to say my father got his disability and even though it was rough raising a family of five on a measley little retirement check with on and off employment....we turned out for the best. Even though others on our block had basically lied to the welfare department and risked getting caught committing fraud. My grandmother: She lived in public housing for years after my grandfather and her divorced. And all she ever wanted to do was own a place of her own. Well, she worked her whole life in a factory and her body ended up paying the price in her elder years. She got every kind of assistance when she lived in public housing and eventually we moved her to live nearby us because she no longer could drive to appointments or basically do anything after her leg amputation. She was able to afford a reasonable rent without assistance and went down to apply for food stamps. They cut her food stamps from $300 to $38 after she moved into a place where she paid rent. I was so mad that this happened to her, because it was not like an aged, onelegged woman was going to be able to work to supplement her lack of assistance. It seemed so twisted that this happened. In the end my grandmother was happy to live her final years without total public assistance, even though many times we had to go to a food pantry to help fill her pantry. So, what do you guys think about how unfair or do you think the welfare system is fair? Do you think they allow people to get back on there feet or are they creating a cycle for people to get stuck on assistance?