why do women change their names and not men

@sine2x (52)
Ghana
June 13, 2008 8:15pm CST
wonder why women change their name when they get married and not men. is it fair huh?
1 person likes this
4 responses
@jonesy123 (3950)
• United States
14 Jun 08
It's just traditional from the time when the wife still had to love and obey, lol. And for simplicity reasons people still hold on to that system, although you don't have to. Other countries have other systems in place for the name designation of the 'family unit'. Here in the US and I know in Germany, too, you can keep your maiden name, take your spouses name, or have a hyphenated double name. I now guys who took their wife's maiden name. Personally, I'm more traditional and now that having different names will lead to confusion. My SIL kept hers and people never know how to address them as a family, lol. Anyhow, I took my husbands very generic name, lol.
1 person likes this
@sine2x (52)
• Ghana
14 Jun 08
why should tradition allow men to keep their names and women change theirs . so unfair
1 person likes this
• Canada
14 Jun 08
My husband insists on things having MY name irst. The Myname & Hisname family, or just simply "Greetings from Myname & Hisname" since we don't really have a family since we don't have kids. Now, mind you if his son was staying with us, it would be the MyName & HisName Family" both names displayed. His teenaged son is pretty cool with this, and was even cooler with it once his DAd pointed a few thing out about the old tradition.
@roniroxas (10574)
• Philippines
14 Jun 08
i think it is fair during those times were men go out and work and bring home the bacon. some of men of the new era stays home and the woman is the one working already then on that pet i dont think it is fair anymore. if a wife stays at home and be a 24-7 wife and mother then i think it is okay. well that is only my views. i also learned that in japan if you are a first born (LADY) and you are going to get married you are not going to carry the surname of your husband he will be the one carrying your surname. what can you say about that rule? that applies only for first born ladies
1 person likes this
@kameleen (151)
• Belgium
14 Jun 08
It's tradition that comes from christianity, or so they said to me at school (years ago). Christians (and jews to, it's something from the old testament) believed that it was the man who 'planted' a seed in the woman. The woman was viewed as only being the bearer of the child and nothing more. And offcourse she would be the one caring for it too. Christians where a bit all centred around the man, the woman was made from the man and is therefor only a part of the man. You all know the story of adam and eve i guess. In the past this viewing system was a good adaptation for the environment the people were living in. Woman can give young children milk, man can not, so it was easy do decision who was the one caring for the children and who the one that will do the more dangerous tasks... oh well... i could go on and on. In any case: That's were the inequality between man and woman come from in our tradition. In these times it isn't so well addapted anymore, but it's difficult to change things that are believed by most to be the will of god or some say even nature. Allthough it was just a way to survive then and i think that god would rather want us to find new ways then stick to the old ones. But then again.. i myself don't believe in god, so i don't know how a believer would think about this.
@kameleen (151)
• Belgium
14 Jun 08
i almost forgot: it's because christians saw women as a property of men, that it was obvious the woman would get the name of the man and not otherwise or different. It sounds really inequal and it is, cause women where viewed as inequal to men for a very long time. And even now it's still difficult for many to see it different. Even for women, who easily lessen themselfs in the eyes of man. But it's changing, it only needs time, you can't rush some things.
• Canada
14 Jun 08
I don't think it's fair at all. I didn't change my name when I got married, and if I did, my husband would have given me proper sh!t or it. There are beliefs in some cultures, and it was pretty wisely spread a long time ago, that men were the head of the family, and so men had the amily name. I don' think that's fair. Unfortunately women tend to be people of tradition and don't even think about this when they get married. Unfortunately I have been nailed (mostly by women) for not keeping with tradition. AARRGGHH!!!