young moms, teen moms

I am right there with you! I was also 18 when my son was born. I do not regret anything about him. But I feel like there is SO much I am missing out on. I will be 23 next month. And I now have 2 kids. My daughter is 2. I am a stay at home mom and so I sit here all the time. We only ahve one vehicle so I couldnt leave if I wanted to. Most of my friends have children, but there are a few that I was extremely close with before I got pregnant and now we barely talk. When we do talk she tells me about all these things she is/has done. Makes me a little jealous sometimes. ONe day it will get better...we just have to stick it out and be the best mothers we can be.

Hi there! I was not as young as you were when I had my daughter but I had her when I was 20. I was 20 and was not with the father anymore. I am luckily married now to someone who is a father to her and my son but I raised her alone for 3 years. I didn't have any problems in the beginning with her but since about 6 months ago or so I have not regretted having her - but regretted that I did not get to have much of an adult life - a life of fun - before I had to settle down "grow up" and be a parent. I missed out on alot and I do get upset about that so I end up wanting to go out more now. Now mind you, I go out once a week and to some people that is not alot but for me it is as I spent the past several years doing nothing but being at home. I felt "lost" - like I didn't have my own identity anymore...actually, since I was so young when I had her - I actually never had time to develop one so I feel that pain of not knowing who I am besides "mom" and "wife"....just stick in there...

i am not a mom yet but i feel that it was not a mistake i feel that every child that comes from god is a blessing parenthood does not come with a manual keep your head up you may feel what you did was not right at all but it is nothing really that you can do about now ive learnt not too cry over spilt milk there is many things in my life that i would like too change in my life im sure you have alot of things you would like to change about your life but do not be so hard on yourself i am sure you are a great mother and your child loves you very much i dont if you are a christian but i am and i will be praying for you i will do it right now father gofd in the name of jesus i pray for this young mom that you would lift her spirit and allow her too see that is special and that she is loved by you and you gave her this child as a blessing lord help her to be the best mom she can be to this chilld lord in jesus name i pray amen!!!!!

I was actually not a teen or young mom, but I wished with all my heart I had been! There was nothing more that I wanted when I was 18 than to be a mother, unfortunately, there were no good people around to make that a reality. There seems to be a shortage of young men who are interested in a committed loving relationship AND want to be a daddy. Anyhow, I do know that it can be hard to put what you want aside. Being a teen anyway is tough, what you want is the benefits and the fun but lots of teens are unwilling to accept the responsiblity that goes along with it, doing all the 'dirty work' that goes into taking care of a home, including cleaning, laundry, cooking, keeping track of everybody's appts and schedules, school, studying, a job if you have one. Your daughter loves you! My daughter is 4, and I have two teens, and sometimes they act like or say they don't love me. I know they do though, they just react badly when they hear the word no lol! Whenever you begin to question yourself, remember that out of everybody out there, you are her mother, and she was given to you to love and care for, teach, and watch her grow. While there are people out there who are also wonderful mothers, you are one of a kind, and just as wonderful.

I can read the message behind your post and I know how you feel even if I haven't experienced your situation first hand. I know that it's been tough on you but you should reflect and think about what's present. Your daughter is a great gift and I'm sure she loves you very much. You just also have to adjust and give time for yourself as well. But not the way you did before...

I am 20,but i did not have boyfriend.So i have not this experience.but i want to say something.I think you should not be regreted,I think the good mother is not depend the mother's age.The young mother can become the child's good friend

I know what you are saying and can definately understand how you feel. I got pregnant and had my oldest daughter at the age of sixteen, yes 16 years old. She was three months premature and only weighted two pounds and two ounces. My teenage years ended and fast. I became a mother and a wife at sixteen. I had those feelings and things were very difficult. But don't give up! Believe me when I tell you this, it is all worth it in the end. When your daughter is older and you are sitting there talking to her and laughing about things and she tells you, for no reason, how much she loves you. There is no other feeling in the world. I know. My oldest is now fifteen years old and she has told me that I have inspired her to be the best in all she does and that she loves me to no end. She gives me hugs and kisses for no reason and tells me she loves me all of the time. Sometimes just out of the blue. She is my daughter, my life, and my best friend. Having a child at a young age is difficult, I know, but a child is a blessing. When you feel yourself stressing out, take a step back and really take a look at your daughter. She is you, a part of who you are. Take pleasures in the milestones your daughter is about to go through and cherrish every moment with her, they pass so quickly. Best of luck to you and your daughter! If you ever need to talk, all you have to do is message me, I will be happy to talk to you.

I'm a little older and had my son when I was 25, but if I may...? Nothing is wrong with you and forgive yourself for being careless. That's done and you have accepted and love your little girl. Talk to someone you trust (mom, pastor, older friend, get involved with a church) about disciplining her and keep a good routine and consistency around the both of you. This will take a lot more stress off you and her even though if may be hard at first. And can you maybe trade off with another mom or someone that would occasionally take her on a playdate or something that would give you and the other mom a break? Like a day to yourself? Taking a break won't make you a bad mother and if you reach out to another mother that may be a little older than you, most will completely understand and be thankful for the tradeoff every now and then. My son is 17 (the worry don't end even then lol) but I have a friend that is only 22 and she has a hard time with a 4 year old that I will just take with me sometimes to give her a break. She loves it and so does her child. I can see that you want to "own up" so to speak, but do not be afraid to reach out to those around you. You may be surprised to find that many mothers will not only understand, but will want to support you. If you feel unworthy as a mother, join the crowd. Even with a 17 year old that's turning into an incredible young man, I still question my parenting abilities and thank God that, with his help, I've managed to do pretty good. There are so many opportunities out there for single moms to get help with going to tech or even college. Maybe call your local tech school and check on something that interests you, cooking, writing, some kind of hobby class. Something just for you. Anyway, nothings wrong with you, all mothers feel frustration especially with their first child no matter what their age. It's scary to know that you are responsible for this little person that is helpless and then boom...they start to have a mind of their own and that helpless feeling get worse. My heart's going out to you and I am praying for you. I hope something I've said helps in some way, no matter how small. The best to you.

though I'm not a young mom, I can relate to your story..All I can say to you is that being a mommy is a valuable gift that we should treasure, it will measure our endurance and patience.It will make us discover who we really are and what is our purpose of living in this world. I can say that you are in the point of your life in which you feel a lot of pressure and difficulties, but just keep in mind that God is always there to help us overcome our problems. May you find the right answers in your heart.

I must say that I completely know how you feel. I found out I was pregnant a week before my 19th birthday. My son is now one and I am approaching my 21st bday next month. I have been a full time college student, and will hopefully be a licensed nurse next year. But I must admit that there isn't a day that goes by that I don't regret becoming a parent. But at the end of the day my love for him makes up for it. There is not one day that goes by he doesnt put a smile on my face. It's all a part of growing up, as long as you don't neglect the child then you will be just fine. I know it seems like the world just shames you. But show the world what you're made of. It won't be so hard forever.. One day you will wake up and the baby will be all grown up. So cherish what you have right now.

Motherhood is a challenge for any age mom, but being a teenage mother poses so many more obstacles. A teenage mother must make sacrifices and decisions that she never thought she would have to make so soon. She may be alone and have no one to turn to. With a little planning and confidence, teenage mothers can make it.

hi there yungmama_02. I was also a young mom.. i got pregnant when i was 19 and gave birth when i was 20. It's very hard being a young mom but im very proud to tell that i have no regrets at all. i love being a wife and i love being a mom.. i love my kid so much.. he's turning 2 on august. at first, it was very difficult to cope with but eventually i got used to it. Just pray to God and ask to give you more strength and patience to handle your situation. Maybe your just too young but I now, time will come that you will find it enjoying to be a mom.. :)

i can definitely understand where you are coming from i had my first son when i was 20 and now he's 4 and i just had another baby in April. My 4 year old is out of control, and the sad part is that he is so smart, he has the best memory and he is my first son so of course that is why it hurts soooo badly when i have to yell at him. he has gotten soo out of control that i have started giving him spanking cause it seems nothing else will work. even having said all of that i dont regret anything about him because everything is a life lesson and it will only make you stronger. and no you are not a bad mother and you shouldnt feel bad i am sure you have done a wonderful job raising her and if you are a single mother if that is all that she has been up to you are doing good. i am not a single mother and my son makes me want to call him all kinds of names, so you are doing good but just keep your head up.

Me and my husband had our baby daughter Meghan, when I was just turned 20 years old, and we were in a foreign country with no family around. Every once in a while it's just good if you can to take a tiny moment for yourself to relieve any pressure you might be feeling. I don't regret for one minute ever getting pregnant with my daughter at such a young age because being a parent to her has been the most rewarding experience. Just getting to wake up with her everyday, see her experience life's milestones such as getting her 1st tooth and learning to walk, and say momma is the best feeling in the world. Just make time to talk to someone about the feelings you want to share about parenting and stuff you might be going through. I can't even imagine my world without her in it because she brings so much joy into my life. All you can do is try to be the best parent you can be for your daughter and bring her up good so she can look up to you one day and thank you for being there for her.

I am not a new or young mother, but I can hear your heartcry in your words. I want to encourage you that you will absolutley not regret being a mom as long as you know you are doing the best you can. The things that you mention are true for most parent/child relationships. Children are a handful and we do have to make great sacrifices everyday on their behalf. There are many days when they are a drain and it seems like it is way too hard and somebody else must be able to do this better. You WILL want to give up, but... Nobody can be a better mother to your child than you can. There are also many quiet moments when the joy you feel by seeing your child happy makes you a hundred times more full of joy. There are many small moments where you will say, wow, she is so smart! It may help to start a journal or scrapbook of the blessings you receive from your child so you can look back on it during those hard times. Every mom knows what you are saying, it is not that you are young or immature it is that being a mom is hard, no doubt, but you will find no greater joy or reward than to raise a child if you allow yourself to grow and learn from the process. I wish you well and encourage you to seek God and scripture on this topic. You need to get plugged into a support system and/or church that can help you through this. You will not regret it. Blessings!