My poor mother and father.

Canada
June 19, 2008 4:05pm CST
My mother has been sick since she was very young with Bi My father has been with her for 25 years and never once used to even think about leaving her side. This time around it's hitting my father harder because my mom is less willing to help herself. Or even just doesn't care to help herself anymore. I have gone back home and attended doctors appointments with her in may and they have re admitted her. I feel horrible being the one to say the things to the doctors but my mom doesn't want my father around when she is near the doctors. I've come to find out my mom has been lieing and or delusional about the things that are happening. If she dreams it and wakes up she feels she is in the same dream but in real life. While I was there my mother woke up screaming that my father was beating her. He is not the type to hit anyone. She walked around the house all day telling everyone she talked to on the phone and net that my father was beating her. My father was out of town and thankfully I was there to prove it and explain what I seen to the doctor. We we went to the appointment my mother had told the doctor that my father had beat her and so on. I explained everything and the doctor had her leave the room. The doctor then told me about other cases that my mother had been saying about my father. I feel so bad for him having to deal with this. He loves her so much and wont leave her because of the kids. Well us kids are 22 and 24 now, and if that's what he needs or wants or chooses to do I will stand beside him all the way. Of course I don't want to ever see that happen as I was VERY lucky to have a mom and a dad for this long, but if thats what it takes to have both of them safe and happy then so be it. I have almost changed my opinion on things about my mother now that I see a lot more changes in her behavior, attitude, willing ness for help and so on. I have a feeling she will be locked away in the near future as she has threatened to kill our family, suicide and much more. I know it would be the best for her to have 24 hour supervision but then again I agree that she should have her free space. But for the sake of my family and friends it might be the best thing to do. Im so confused. My dad has finally started talking divorce the first time in the 22 years I've known him. I don't know what to think. I know what his family will say, but what about my mothers siblings?
1 person likes this
2 responses
@mtrekster (179)
• United States
20 Jun 08
look into getting help for your mother, there are those out there that will help with people in thie area. also are there support groups for bipolar people? you may have to get into that for any that deal with the disorder and have support for the loved ones of such a matter. keep after her to take the meds that she has to, it will help her out. and also do keep an eye on her with other aides if you have to hire any to keep an eye on her. likewise, if it gets too bad for her, get ahold of the brothers and sisters that she has, tell them what has been going on, and get their help in what she may need,along with any help from drs, specialists, as well as any others who may be able to help you. dont let it burn you out.
• Canada
20 Jun 08
It has yet to burn me out but after 25 years my dad is completely burnt out. He's not the same as he used to be and he is o rushed with his day to day stuff. 6am-4pm gone for work 5-6 coffee with his friends 6-9 up at the hospital with my mom then home to bed and what ever needs to be done around the house. its to the point that we've mentioned things to the other family members but they don't really have answers for us either. weve done the family counsellings and family doctor appointments and such and its just come to the end of the rope where these doctors are even getting burnt out with her case. Im looking into finding her new doctors in a bigger city. I am taking a Health care aide course at the college so i know how to take care of her better when he does need a care worker.
• United States
21 Jun 08
As someone who deals with bipolar, i must say that then support you show your dad and mom is not in vain. Sometimes it's the only thing that keeps them going from day to day.
• Canada
22 Jun 08
They tried telling me I was bipolar when I was 16. At that point in my life yes I was a little out of the loop and a tad depressed but it also had alot to do with who I was living with and the life I had previous chosen to live which i was getting out of. So to me any type of support for my family means alot to me and them as ive been in rough spots before.
@SomeCowgirl (32254)
• United States
19 Jun 08
I know how you must feel about this, and I know that it also must have been hard growing up. My brother is bipolar and growing up I was forced to lock myself away as I was a trigger to him when he was having a mood. At a very young age I was forced to be a more mature person then I wanted to be, and that has strengthened me now even though I never thought it would. Have you tried every possible thing, medicine and vitamins to help your mother as well as therapists and I have also heard of light therapy although I am not sure what that means. I think that your mother's sibilings will understand deep down that your father is not doing this because he no longer loves your mother but because she has worn his pride and patience and that he seems to be her trigger now. I hope that everything gets worked out for you , and good luck with this. Have a Great day.
1 person likes this