A Friendship of 21 Years

By Gabs
@gabs8513 (48686)
United Kingdom
June 22, 2008 4:20am CST
We met through the Army, we became very good Friends and most of the time lived close to one another We had ups and downs we survived them I used to take them to work early hours when they where on different shifts and they only had one car I was there when their beloved Dog died They where there when I went through my Divorce, our Kids are like Brother and Sister They where there when I needed to escape from the Ex Husband because I could take no more, I was there when my Friend went through a tough with her Husband I was there when my Friend got rushed into Hospital and I took him to see her every Day so they did not have to use their Petrol, I had a Company Car then, I was there when he cried because he was scared, I was there when she cried because this had never happened to her I was there to help her when she came out of Hospital, when he was of work I would help with things, when he went back to work, I would go over every Day to help her with things We had good times we had bad times I was there when he got rushed into Hospital with Kidney Stones, I was there with my Car if they needed to go somewhere to save their Petrol I loved them the Friendship was special Then it happens .......... I decide I am moving to the South, reasons?? Well there are a few, my loving Man is here I want to be close to him,Wrong? The Air is better for my Lungs in this Area, Wrong? I never really liked it up North, stayed there because the Ex Husband wanted to , Wrong? I want to get away from everything bad there, Wrong? I knew I would be happy here and I am, again Wrong? My Children did not want to move with this, they have their Lives, Jobs and Friends there, well that was fine, it was hard for us to part but we 3 Understand each other, yes we still miss one another but we have got used to it My Friends tried their best to talk to me out of it It was not on Impulse I moved here, I had known my Man for 5 Years then and out of those 5 Years we had been in a relationship for 2 Years I had been separated for 4 1/2 Years and divorced for 1 1/2 Years, but my Friends thought I was doing wrong, well I didn't I knew what I wanted and I had been thinking about it for a while, when I lost my Job because of my Illness I was lost, I thought I would come back to myself, My Children and My Boyfriend helped me through that tough time, he was 3 hours away from me but he helped me so much I moved, they didn't even really accept the fact that for once in my Life I was doing what I wanted to do not what others are telling me to do I have lived here now happily (even though I miss my Kids) for 1 1/2 years I have been back to visit my Children and went to see them, I have phoned them 4 times in that Time, they have not phoned me, My Son told them last Saturday I was going into Hospital, the reply he got is " We have not heard from your Mum for a while now" Well Hello you have my Numbers I have called a few times. My Son got a bit angry but swallowed his reply to them. Sunday I try to ring no answer, I send a Message no reply at all I go into Hospital, I come out It is nearly a week, still nothing, I have tried to tell myself for a week now so what who cares, today I realise I care, it hurts, but I am not begging for their Friendship, I am not ringing, I rather hurt for a bit, then keep having to make the moves, no more But it hurts, it really hurts, I feel like I have been kicked badly and all because I moved and followed my Heart, did for once in my Life what I wanted to do, found someone that loves me for who I am,, who does not want to change anything about me, that I love with all my Heart If anyone had the right to be mad at me it was my Children but they are not, they are happy for me as they see how happy he makes me, as they see that my breathing is better since I moved here For once I am putting myself first and if that destroys a 21 year Friendship, so it will be How do you feel about this? Am I wrong to do this?
14 people like this
33 responses
@weemam (13372)
22 Jun 08
I am sorry to say this pal but the were not good friends , Good friends would have phones to see how you were and they would certainly have got in touch to see how you were after our operation, You have tried more than once to contact them pal, They are the ones loosing out on a good friendship , I would say just put it behind you xx
5 people like this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
24 Jun 08
I will do as I know it will never bloom again unless I beg them again to ring and that well I am not prepared to any more why should I beg them I have done nothing wrong Hugs xxxx
1 person likes this
22 Jun 08
Not at all wrong! Sometimes in life you just have to do things for yourself to tough to the rest of the world. As I see it, sadly, your lifelong friends have proved what good friends they aren't! Just because you no longer live down the street doesn't mean you can't still be close friends. I grew up in South Africa, now live in the UK and I am still friends with school friends who are now in the UK and Australia. Granted, we don't chat every day, but we do email and keep in touch and it is usually a two way street. Sadly, with some people you do need to make more effort though - some people just seem to get too tied up in their lives to worry abut what is happening with an dear old friend who no longer lives close by. Go well and trust in your own best judgement. You did what was best for you and that is all that matters. Violetdreams
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
24 Jun 08
Thank you Violet I have tried but now it is not up to me any more I know I won't hear from them because I know their way of thinking and of course it will be my fault, well they can think it as I know it is not I have a clear Conciouns so as far as I am concerned if this is how they want it then this is how it will be My Man, my Children and my Gissi are the light of my Life and all my Friends here including you are what Matter and nothing else any more Thank you Sweetie
1 person likes this
@winterose (39887)
• Canada
22 Jun 08
You did all that you possibly good, if they don't respond then there is nothing you can do about it. You can lift up your head high, you tried.
4 people like this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
24 Jun 08
Yes I can Rose and I will I am glad that you have more work I am so happy for you Hugs
1 person likes this
@ElicBxn (63252)
• United States
22 Jun 08
gabs, I think that all it showed was what kinds of friends they were in the first place. When you were there, you were convienent, you helped Them, you were a friend, now that you aren't convienent and you aren't helping them, you are just someone they used to know.
4 people like this
@funnysis (2619)
• United States
8 Jul 08
I have known people like that to they think that you cannot be friends from a distance and you can.
1 person likes this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
24 Jun 08
You have put in words what I had in my Head but did not want to speak out loud but I have to face reality no matter what I guess Thank you Elic I appreciate this
2 people like this
@ElicBxn (63252)
• United States
24 Jun 08
Sadly, I've known people like that myself, so I know of what I speak.
2 people like this
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
22 Jun 08
I'm going to be quite frank here, ok gabs? HELL NOOOOO you are in your right to do what you feel is right for YOU. These so called friends aren't your friends when knowing full well about your breathing problems and yet they wanted you to stay which means to suffer more. That's not friendship, that's selfishness. What I would do is write them a letter and tell them how you feel and send it to them, save a copy for yourself. Just be nice in explaining yourself so it can't come back to you. But no, you did nothing wrong. You had to move to better your health and I'm so glad you did! I'm positive that so many others on here and abroad agree!! Now go write that letter and get it off of your chest. If you get a reply back then you can go from there but if not then they weren't your friends to begin with. Good luck sweetie!
4 people like this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
24 Jun 08
Hi there Cats I have already done that now as I read what you wrote but have only just been able to reply now I know I will not get anything back as I know their way of thinking and they will say that I let them down and that so I am really not expecting a reply Thank you so much though and I hope everything is ok at your end I hope that your Cat is better to I have read it but I am not able to respond to all at the moment so I am sorry Hugs to you and to your Mum tell her to keep doing well from me
2 people like this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
25 Jun 08
I got an email and they are not interested so neither am I sweet I will not even reply All I got was glad you are well bye and that says it all and that is it for me Hugs to you
1 person likes this
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
25 Jun 08
Sweet gabs, I'm assuming you just sent your letter to them and in doing so, if they do respond back and say that you let them down then they were never your friends to begin with because they're thinking of only themselves and not of you and your health. It's a heck of a blow to you, I know for I've been there in your shoes and it does hurt like hell but in time the pain will ease up, never really go away but it'll ease up some and maybe eventually go away. I'm so sorry hon but you don't need people like that. You're a real and true friend so you deserve nothing less than that in return. My God bless you!!
2 people like this
• Philippines
22 Jun 08
Gab, doing what you want is not wrong. Sometimes we have to do things that might hurt other people,but its not really our intention to hurt them, but we just did what we thought was right! I understand that you felt bad about what your friends did to you, it really hurts a lot! But you have to understand that people change, its part of our life! even though it hurts a lot, you have to move on! its hard i know, but dealing with this problem all over again can only cause you depression. at least you found out that they were not that concern about you or your health. just remember that, there are "TWO" types of Friends, the "forever and today". The first one, it deals with those people that can last much longer. it doesn't matter if your not here or if your not around, but for them, you will always be their friend until the end,and they will not even ask for anything. the next is that, friends for today not for tomorrow, why? this type of friends are the one who are fun of using someone else, they stay because they need something, they stay because it can help them a lot. especially when it comes to financial problems. i wish you luck! :(
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
24 Jun 08
Enimsa thank you and you are very right, I had to find out the hard way again I guess but yes now I am no use to them I suppose why carry on contacting me lol I will get over it as I am surrounded by a lot of Love true and caring Love Thank you for your wonderful advise I really appreciate this Welcome to mylot and I do hope you enjoy it here
1 person likes this
@dana234 (2114)
• Spain
22 Jun 08
I don't think these people were real friends, gabs. This might sound a bit harsh and I don't mean to hurt you, but in my opinion they were using you. Real friends share your joy and respect your decisions. One thing is feeling sad when a close friend moves away and a very different one is getting angry and sulky about it. They should be glad that you're happy where you are. You did your best to stay in contact if they don't reply just let it pass. They are not worth the bother. You're not wrong at all in doing what you did. It's your right to decide where you want to live, especially if this helps your health issues. THEY are selfish, not you. A big hug to you from XXX Dana
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
24 Jun 08
Hi Dana Yes you are right and you have not hurt me as you are talking the truth and I know you are I just did not want to face the Truth but I have now and I will get over it Love and Hugs to you xxxx
1 person likes this
@someonesmom (5761)
• Canada
23 Jun 08
Twenty one years of friendship is too long to just throw away, but that's exactly what these people have done. I'll never understand this kind of thing, and it's definitely them that are in the wrong. As somebody I know says, " The phone runs two ways." You've already tried several times to reach out to them, and still nothing. What they said to your son was very rude, and I can understand why you're feeling hurt and used. It seems that some people are only interested in a frienship for what they can get out of it. You made the right decision, based on your own needs, and it's wonderful that you're able to be close to your man, and that your breathing is much better where you are now. I often feel that I've lived my life according to the way others think I should, and haven't really thought about what I need or want. I'm not trying to sound selfish, but I think I have the right to do this, and I'm slowly coming to this conclusion. I know so many people who live this way without being thoughtless, but yet manage to make their own choices. I hope that you'll continue to think about what you want, and that I'll have the courage (for me) that it takes to do likewise. Hugs xxx
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
24 Jun 08
Hi Mom, I know that you will get the courage to I really do It took me many years of being hurt down trodden being called Names, being told I am not special, being told I don't know what is best and lots of other Things to get where I am now and I have sworn never again, will I be told those things and never again will I beg People and I am sticking to that You will find the courage and strength it is hard and scary at first but then it is ok from there Love and Hugs to you
2 people like this
• Canada
25 Jun 08
Thanks so much, heavens. You're a shining example for me to follow gabs. I can tell that you're a very courageous lady, who can definitely stand on her own two feet. Just because (we) decide it's time we did this, doesn't mean we have to disregard the feelings of others to do so. I believe it's possible to be both tactful, yet assertive.
2 people like this
• Canada
24 Jun 08
Me too Mom! I'm with you and I love you! HUGS ~Heavens~
3 people like this
• Canada
22 Jun 08
Oh Gabs! You were so NOT wrong for ANY of the decisions you made! You were nothing but a good friend to them for all of those years...Kind and considerate and there for them when they needed you...Sounds like all they wanted was your services rather than your friendship! Sad really...I fel sorry for them and no I wouldn't stress over it but I understand how you feel in a way.... My best friend all through High School and College sent me back the invitation to my wedding saying that I was not a good friend and that I had said and done all of these things that had not happened at all!!! She told me in a letter never to contact her again after we had been like sisters...inseparable and there for each other through everything! I find after she married that she changed somehow...and I was her maid of honor...It started with her disappearing and me losing contact...not being able to find her and then I moved and knew she would never be able to find me...I missed her so much until I saw her in a building where friends of my Fiancee's (Now hubby) lived and I was so excited! I rushed there with a wedding invitation and had my fiancee in tow to boot! I missed her so much I really wanterd her to meet my man and have a visit with them and so I did...she gave me her phone number and I gave her mine and address so that she could come and visit me I was so happy we had had such a good visit that day. I was also thrilled for her as she was pregnant and I was so looking forward to seeing her baby and being a part of that as well! A short time later...Maybe a couple of weeks I received a small pink envelope with her return address on it and thought that it was great that she had wrote me....Only to find that my wedding invitation I had given her was folded up and creased (Garbage, un-useable) And her letterwas all about how she would be very busy with her new family and had no time for me and how I had done all these things that I hadn't and even that I did not like the dress that she had chose for me to wear on her wedding day...No idea where she got this idea!!! I even wore that same dress to my College Grad to receive my diploma and a couple other formal Christmas Parties since then so If I didn't like it, I have sure gotten a lot of wear out of it! LOL I still love and miss her but I just came to terms that I needed to respect her wishes and now I have other far more important things to focus my energies on! To me, she will always be like a sister to me and I lover her very much if she ever decided to look for me but I'm not going her way! You can talk to me any times Gabs! I'll never turn you away! True friends are always there and I am sorry that you had to go through this...especially the way they acted towards your son and now are not answering the phone! This is ridiculous behavior! Love and Hugs ~Heavens~
3 people like this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
23 Jun 08
Sweetie I just do not understand how People can turn like that I really don't I mean if we have suppose to have done something why don't they say and sort it out like Adults Well, I guess I will have to get used to living without them in my Life Hugs to you Sweetie
3 people like this
• Canada
24 Jun 08
Yes, I fully agree with you! The problem with my friend was that she wrote me that letter and said at the end of it that I was NEVER To call, write, or visit...Leaving me no chance to voice my side of the story or try to fix the misunderstanding(s).... She said with the baby coming she would have no time for me and needed to focus on her family right now...Wasn't I like a sister to her all those years....We were inseparable until she got married and then well I guess she decided to throw it all away I'll be married six years in August and yet I still love her (Can't help it!) I must say that I have quite the bad luck (If you call it that)( with friends as I had more desert me when my son was diagnosed with Autism...People often run and hide when they hear and you really find who your true friends are...sadly I do not have many! Love and Hugs to you as well my dear friend! ~Heavens~
3 people like this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
24 Jun 08
Heaven that is terrible that is where you need your Friends well I guess we can say they where not Friends at all I am sad that I do not live closer to you believe me I would not run, I would be there to help you as much as I could as that is what Friends do not run away believe me you have a Friend here for ever even if I have not rang you for a while you are in my thoughts Sweetie and never doubt that Love and Hugs to you
3 people like this
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
23 Jun 08
You know hun, I know how bad it hurts when someone just turns their back on you when you need the support the most, but you have to do whats right for you. There is a saying I am very fond of: God determines who walks into your life, it's up to you to decide who you let walk away. who you let stay, and who you refuse to let go. People who can't be happy for you moving on to a new phase of your life because they don't get what they got from you before in my opionion are the ones you need to let walk away. I know that with the time you have spent as friends it can be really hard to do. It would almost be like getting a divorce. You have a lot of time and feelings invested in these people. There are some people on this Earth they only want what they can get from someone else. I am saddened for you to be treated this way. I do know how it feels and I know what you are going through. Just take to heart Gabs that we love you here and wouldn't trade you for the world!
3 people like this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
25 Jun 08
Erylyn that is so sweet of you to say and yes I have closed that Chapter now as they are not interested so I am not any more either I am happy now and that is how I am staying I have wonderful Friends here and that is enough for me and that includes you Sweetie Big Hugs
2 people like this
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
1 Jul 08
I am very happy to be included in that list. Huggs to you too hun. Sorry it took so long for me to get back here, how are you feeling? I hope that you are doing better. I would miss you terribly if you had to be away.
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Jun 08
Gabby no one can tell you what to do. No one has the right to try to tell you how to run your life. I think they are upset because they feel they lost a good friend. But lets be real here they did not lose you they have shut you out. I think you are in the right to do what you needed to to for your self and for your health. I think when friends have been around for so long and have not seen a person live their own life they cannot handle it when they do make decisions on their own. You needed to get out of where you where for your health physically and mentally. You are so much better off where you are. You have so many friends here at myLot who know the kind and wonderful person you have are. I can tell you from experance some friends do not like it when their friends change. I am going through that with one soon to be ex-friend who does not like that I cannot work full time anymore. You are not in the wrong follow your heat.
3 people like this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
24 Jun 08
Thank you Teapot and I guess that the Friend of yours is still going on at you I will not make the contact any more if they want me they know how to get hold of me now as I have tried and I am not begging no more Love you Big Hugs
2 people like this
• United States
24 Jun 08
I am so sorry to here when a friend ship breaks up like that. My friend who cannot stand that I cannot work is getting weirder and weirder. She just came back from Mexico on vacation. I swear she sun burnt her brain. She told me chili renellos where made from cactus. Hello why do they call them Chili they do not call them cactus. She told me I did not know what I was talking about. She does not cook and I do.
@vaishalik (237)
• India
22 Jun 08
You have proved that you are a real friend in need. Don't think your 21 yrs friendship destroyed. They may be or not, you can keep your friendship with them if you want.
4 people like this
@gemini_rose (16264)
22 Jun 08
I am sorry to hear your story gabs, it is a real shame that you have been treated like that. I can understand your friend being upset at you moving away but I do not understand her being like this to you. Not after such a long friendship. Friendship can be carried on no matter what the distance and there is no need for it, OK I know that life overtakes us sometimes and things can get hectic. Time passes so quick sometimes that weeks can pass before we realise we have not spoken to someone for a while. But then you pick up the phone and catch up. I do not think you are wrong, sounds to me like your move was the best thing that you could do. Sounds like you are much happier where you are and you did the right thing. x
3 people like this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
23 Jun 08
Thank you Sweetie they can't say I have not tried as I have very much but I realise now that it is useless I know the signs and if that is how they want it then fair do I am not begging and they will find that out because unless they now contact me I will not be seeing them or talking to them any more End of 21 Years, yes this hurts bad but I will get over it Love and Hugs to you xx Angel thank you and yes you are both right
2 people like this
• China
23 Jun 08
I agree with gemini_rose's opinion,you have done the right thing and the right decision!don't feel sad!be happier and happier!
3 people like this
@Gollywog (1092)
22 Jun 08
YOU ARE WRONG? If you beg for there friendship, real frienships never die? You can be a million miles apart but still be in constant touch and still have a perfect friendship? They are mad because you left them and they do not have anyone as good as you around to Wipe there A*s! you were to good a friend and they know they are in the Sh*t without your constant Help? Sorry if I upset you but these to are complete As**oles! Your children know you have a life to lead and so do they, I only have one son at home my others are scattered but we talk mostly every day, the least is 5 times a week. Im looking to move and it will be at least another 40 miles or so away from my brood. Your friends should be begging for your forgivness? They should have called you and visit while you have been so ill. Just leave them to their misserable and empty lives gabs you must be so hurt but dont cry your friends here on mylot will look after you? Lots of Love and BIG Hugs? (We could come visit?) LOL
3 people like this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
24 Jun 08
Thank you Golly I really appreciate this as I was beginning to think that I was in the wrong, I have been thinking of this in the last few Days and tried to figure if I did do wrong, but then I thought no it is my Life, my Children agree with me and are happy to so how did I do wrong, well I will not ring any more and I know they won't as they are expecting me to crawl, well they will get a shock now, no more crawling back I am just going to keep going forward Lots of Love to you and thank you xxx
1 person likes this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
25 Jun 08
Yep I totally agree with you there Big Hugs
1 person likes this
@Gollywog (1092)
24 Jun 08
Up and onwards, forwards not backwards? Thats what is for you all good to come it dosnt matter about the people in the past just leave them there and enjoy your future with the people you love your children and your man! It might hurt you a little but I bet its hurting them a lot more the nasties! Big Hugs be happy!
2 people like this
@banta78 (4326)
• India
23 Jun 08
Hello Sweet Gabs, I am back on Mylot as i really missed it. Coming back to the discussion I am really sorry to learn that your friends treated you shabbily. I know it hurts but you did the right thing as sometimes you have to put yourself first. Besides your health is getting better and moreover you helped them through thick and thin. Real friends always support and remain loyal and value friendship. I wish you well. Take care, God bless:)
3 people like this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
25 Jun 08
Thank you my dear Friend and it is good to see you here to I am just going to close the Chapter to that Book now they have had their Chance and can't accept that I have moved on so that is their look out Hugs to you
1 person likes this
@1grnthmb (2055)
• United States
23 Jun 08
Hi Gaby. This is very hard. Especially since you have been friends for so long. I went through something similar. When I moved to this town in 1990, I right away became very close to a young couple from church and we became very best friends. So close that I called them my brother and sister. He lost his job here when the plant he worked for closed. Her dad offered them both jobs at his business so they moved almost four hundred miles away and started their lives over. We remained really good friends and every holiday I would go up to be with them. Well in 1999 I became very sick. Lori was my next door neighbor and also a member of the same church. She would come over and see how I was doing and help me with things I just could not do, comfort me and supply a friend, some one to talk to. She was in a very bad marriage and we would talk for hours about the difficulties she was going through. About a year later she divorced him because he was not a good person at all. I supported her through it as she had supported me when I was sick. Our friendship increased and grew and developed into more than a friendship and we soon were married and I took up her three wonderful girls as my own. She continued to support me through my illness when most people would have avoided me. Well! The people in the church that we went to did not approve of our relationship because they are really strict about their beliefs. We left that church and went to another who excepted us with open arms. But my dear friends who now lived four hundred miles away were influenced by the strict beliefs of the church that we had gone to. They shunned us. Would not come to our wedding. And basically ended our friendship. It was very hard because we had been so close. It was like losing a family member. I know that this is the same emotion that you are having. They have cut you off and it really hurts. They have shown that they are friends only when it is convent to them and it is a one sided friendship. It is so sad when someone who was so close to you decides that they are inconvenienced by you. But they are showing their true colors. They were hurt by you moving and they have not forgiven you. They need to search inside themselves and correct what they feel before they can once again be your friend. If they were true friend they would have put their hard feelings aside a long time ago and been there for you when you went through your surgery and recovery. You are not wrong for putting yourself first. YOu are the one that deserves to be happy and if they can not see it then good riddance to them. They need to be accepting that you have needs and desires to and that the world does not spin around them. Mark
3 people like this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
25 Jun 08
Hi Mark that is terrible I get very confused about this with the Church I always understood they should accept everyone, not judge, they don't realise that God accepts everyone and that we are like Puppets to him, we are controlled by him as such, I am not a believer or Church goer I believe in my own ways But these People like your Friends are not suppose to judge and they did No one can tell their Heart what to feel and I wish that People would also realize if a Marriage is not right then it will not last As you know I have a bad Marriage behind me, I am so angry that People take it onto themselves to judge others I am so sorry that you and Lori had to go through this as you should not have done, you followed your Heart, which you have every right to do As for my Friends well that Chapter is now closed for me I can live without them, they have hurt me bad but well I will get over it Hugs to you all and a big one for Jenny
1 person likes this
@abbey19 (3106)
• Gold Coast, Australia
24 Jun 08
Gabs, don't carry guilt for any of the decisions you have had to make; you did the right thing, and your so-called "friends" cannot be true friends if this is the way they are treating you. Their friendship is just a farce. They were quite happy to be your friend when you were doing things for them, but since you moved away, you are no longer of any use to them (seems to me that's the case anyway). I know it hurts, but if they were true friends, they would be glad that you are in a place where your health has improved, and that you are very happy there. They are destroying the friendship, not you, so don't feel guilty my dear friend.
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
25 Jun 08
Abby you are so right I totally agree with you and I have realized this Just like my Scars will heal the Hurt will heal, I am not going to waste any more time trying to contact them I am happy and that is all that matters to me and I intend to stay happy Love and Hugs to you
1 person likes this
@worldwise1 (14885)
• United States
23 Jun 08
Gabs, dear, you shouldn't change a thing. If these "friends" are so shallow as to not want the absolute best for you, then you're better off without them in your life! It's never easy to say good-bye and close the door on a long-time friendship, but it does have to happen sometimes. We must move forward in our lives, and often that means leaving some things behind. Cherish the memories of your past friendship and don't waste another moment with regrets, because you have done what was best for you.
3 people like this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
25 Jun 08
I know and I am going forward in life I am happy and I will stay that way I have met a lot of lovely Friends here including you and that is my life now and that is how I am staying hugs
1 person likes this
@skinnychick (6905)
• United States
23 Jun 08
I think you are 100 percent right to do what you needed to do. As long as your kids are behind you and your man, that's all you need. You sound like you are happy now and if your friends can't be happy for you, then you don't need them. Surely, if anything, they would understand for your health issues.
3 people like this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
25 Jun 08
Skinny I am very happy and that is why I know I will not hurt for long as all the People that love me make up for the 2 that I have lost
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@kittenmc (464)
• United States
23 Jun 08
Sweetie, I think you did the right thing. If they are mad at you over that and can't be there for you and support you, like you did them, then they are not much of a friend. Grieve for a short time if you have to, but then shake yourself off and keep on keeping on. I believe people come in and out of lives for a reason, maybe it was their time to go. I feel so bad for you that this happened, but you have to do what's best for you. It seems to me you are a very special and rare friend and they were blessed to have you, but sometimes we just have to do what is right for ourselves. I know it hurts, because I have lost 2 close friends over stupid things. One was for 18 years and the other I had knew my whole life. This too shall pass! God will bless you with some more friends that will be just as dear. (Won't take their place, but just as dear) Just in the last few months my husband and I have meet some new friends and it really feels good. I miss my other friends, but this new friendship of ours is what is right and what we need at this time in our life. Good luck to you! And, Many Blessings!
3 people like this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
25 Jun 08
Kitten you are right and I have closed that Chapter already, yes it hurts but the wound will Heal, I have met a lot of lovely Friends on here and I have met some from here I have my lovely Boyfriend and I have my Children, and of course my Little Dog Gissi lol Thank you for your kind words and hugs to you
1 person likes this