Why do parents "marry" their children at a young age?

@SomeCowgirl (32255)
United States
June 25, 2008 11:54pm CST
Have you ever heard of stories where a child is married to another childhood friend, legally? I have heard these kind of cases and feel that while cute, it is just wrong. Children do not understand the extent of marriage and if a child tells another child that they are married, it may cause the child to be teased. How do you feel about these "play" marriages? Have a Great day!
5 people like this
7 responses
@lynettebyc (2416)
• China
27 Jun 08
I haven't heard about this lately. But i've seen in TV shows. Once, if the parents of both children are good friends and the mothers happen to pregnant at the similar time, they will make a deal that if the two babies are heterosexual, they will get married. These do happen in ancient China, very very long ago. And as to the TV show, they will often creat a story that one of the two babies don't want to marry another after growing up as an adult, he/she fails in love with another guy~ Lynette
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32255)
• United States
27 Jun 08
Oh yes I have heard of this myself. One of my old friend's had a deal with one of her other friends. I think that it is just precious to do that. I don't think I have seen it in any story lines on t.v. but I don't watch much soap operas or anything of the sort. Have a Great day.
• China
27 Jun 08
Hey, yeah, i used to watch, not any more now
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32255)
• United States
27 Jun 08
It is hard to keep up with the story lines if you haven't watched in awhile.
• Turkey
26 Jun 08
I agree, I think it's a bad bad idea to be married so young. To be married before you actually got a chance to experience adulthood and all the pressures that come with it is only asking for trouble. I was married (this was my first marriage, so you can see where that lead to) at 20 years old. Looking back now, I know that I still had rose colored glasses on about life and marriage. I thought it was going to be all fun and games and that it was going to a breeze through. Why? That's because I was still thinking with a young persons view to the world. At that age everything is fun and games, who thinks about bills and sacrificing for another? I may have had thoughts about this but I never really considered what it meant. I just think that marrying before you're at least 25 or older is not a good idea. I say, go out and experience life, experience what it means to live as an adult and then get married. Get out of the young persons mindset first. Marrying young is just not a good idea at all in my opinion...
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32255)
• United States
27 Jun 08
I seem to have confused everyone here and feel I must go on search for evidence to support my idea. I am not talking of that kind of marriage. I am talking about younger children who are married for "play". I am sorry that I seemed to have confused you and where I do not agree with your points I do respect them.I understand that your first marriage left something to be desired, but that is only because you were young and that is understandable. Have a Great day.
1 person likes this
• Turkey
27 Jun 08
Now, I am confused...Are you for or against younger children being married for play? In either case, it's wrong if you ask me anyway...
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32255)
• United States
28 Jun 08
I think that it's cute, but not a wise decision of the parents. I know I must have confused everyone, and frankly, making the discussion really late at night isn't smart either, but I think i've gotten everyone straight. "Play" young kid marriages. Have a Great day.
1 person likes this
@rsa101 (22711)
• Philippines
26 Jun 08
I have never seen an actual case like these happened in my place. I read about it that these happens in China before and in India where arranged marriages are a common thing. But I thought this has already stopped in those places. Well I think children should not be forced to be married since they are still so immature on these matters.
@SomeCowgirl (32255)
• United States
26 Jun 08
No, they are not "forced" marriages, nor are they arranged. I have heard of cases where they are married for "play" but are legal. They are not forced to stay together and when they are older can get it annulled. I have only heard of this a few times.
2 people like this
@rsa101 (22711)
• Philippines
26 Jun 08
Oh! In that case, I never heard of it at all. That's absurd why do they do this?
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32255)
• United States
26 Jun 08
I am not sure. I have only heard of it a few days. Have a Great day.
1 person likes this
• India
26 Jun 08
this happens in many places in India and cuteness is certainly not the reason for this. Though my country is progressing on many fronts, women’s emancipation leaves a lot to be desired. Winds of change are blowing, more and more parents are realising that girls can and do take proper care of the parents once they start working and earning their own money. But in many remote areas and conservative families, a girl child is looked upon mainly as a bad investment, to be married off to wealthy and well-established family which will in turn increase the social prestige of the bride’s family. So at the very first opportunity the try to seal a deal with a groom who himself is still in his shorts (so to say). It’s a great relief for the girls’ parents to know that they will not have to search around for grooms and the girl is brainwashed into knowing that she is already married! Neat little arrangement for all…
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32255)
• United States
27 Jun 08
It seems you are talking of arranged marriages. Where I agree with all of your points it is not relevant to the discussion at hand. I agree that it is very convenient for a woman to already have a groom, but I am speaking of marriages that are not finalized. They are indeed able to be annulled and really just "play" child marriages where it is not arranged. I may be speaking of a subject that is not common, but I have seen and heard of it a few times before. Have a Great day.
@cyfernet (2384)
• United States
8 Jul 08
i feel it's wrong to marry children at a tender age when it's the age to play and enjoy. In india it was common to happen a century back and it still happens but now it's only the tribals. Our country had many such things happening god knows why but as we live a more modern life then things are obvious to change
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32255)
• United States
8 Jul 08
Oh I can understand that but I was talking more of a "Play" marriage one that can be annulled but not one that was forced. Have a Wonderful Day!
@Cannonball (3634)
• France
27 Jun 08
Some countries do like that for financial reasons and then sometimes when the couple grow up they can become aware they don't match at all then it will create pain,messy life and of those ones made children the kids will also pay for it. Marriage should be done only for love reasons,that would avoid a lot of problems but maybe love haven't the same meaning in every culture...
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32255)
• United States
27 Jun 08
I do not see how it would be for financial reasons as it would cost money for the wedding and unless you are talking of marrying the child to another families child and then give them the child, I do not understand. Have a Great Day!
@anndocs (249)
26 Jun 08
I Think it's also depends on the culture which is sometimes normal to them, and we have to understand them. There are also arranged marriage even they are not yet born are already plan to bond them. I grew up in conservative family, which we really value the importance of marriage.
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32255)
• United States
26 Jun 08
I can't say that it's a cultural thing per say. Maybe so, as I was going to agree with you but I feel that it is not. My question does not pertain to the arranged marriages that are still common in many other cultures and countries. I am not even delving into customs, only a simple question that begs why would a mother and father marry their child off for play? I know it seems very confusing, the question, but I feel that people have been delving too much into it. I appreciate your answer and respect it dutifully as well. I understand that arranged marriages are already delved out even prior to delivery. It's sad that these things are going on, I would not wish it on my child. The question I ask pertains to an answer that begs to be given on topic of mothers who do it for "play" thus allowing a marriage to be annulled with no fuss from the parents. Have a Great day.
1 person likes this