Educating Children

Tweet

I have two boys, 12 and 13. Now, I try to be this 'enlightened' Dad, establishing rules but not without explaining the 'why' behind them, give the boys their say about them, listen to them, etc. Apart from that I am aware that whoever you deal with, be it a client, a boss, your spouse or a friend, if you want to change any rules, implicit ones or explicit ones, you have to give that other person time to assimilate it. Repeat it several times, ask for feedback, etc. So it is with children. Starting a few days back, I let my boys roam the neigbourhood, with the explicit understanding that when the sun starts to set, I want them in front of my house so that I can see them. And I went through that process of having them repeat the rules whenever they left (inside at nine, in front of the house when it starts to get dark, don't leave the neighbourhood,never separate (we live in Mexixo)etc.) And they dutifully repeated those rules. So why do they disobey them? Yesterday, it was pitch-dark already, they showed up late with some lame excuse, and I'm punishing them now, they are grounded for today. But it's weird, it is as if they HAVE to disobey, some dark instinct in them tells them so.I'm not really angry, just suprised. What do make of it?