Do you donate items to help families in need?
By snoopy04
@snoopy04 (718)
United States
July 12, 2008 2:34pm CST
When you clean out your closet or do some spring cleaning do you donate your items to other families that could really use them. I have found some great sites where you offer items that are still in good useable condition to other families. But it deosnt matter to me whether or not I know them personally. My mother-in-law was over the other night and she saw two garbage bags filled with clothes and toys and other items. She asked what I was going to do with it and I told her I had someone coming by to pick them up. She asked who they were and I said I had posteed on Freecycle and someone answered my post so the clothes are going to them. Well she told me that I was being inconsiderate and selfish because I was giving it to a total stranger instead of my husbands sisters. I told her that the clothes wouldnt fit their kids so thats why I didnt ask. She said it didnt matter because I was expected to ask anyway. Then she told me that my husbands family comes first no matter what. That I better learn the rules around here. So my husband and I had a talk after he got home from work and he had a talk with his mom. She come over and apologize and told me why she reacted the way she did.
I always call his sisters and offer clothes or toys if its appropiate for their kids or something they may like to play with. But when its not the right size why offer.
Was I in the wrong because I offered my stuff to someone other than family. My sons are always giving to their friends or offering to help a family in need. What is so wrong with that. There are times when a friend or even a stranger is more willing to help then a family member. My husbands family helps and I help them as well when I can but I didnt know that was one of their rules.
So is it wrong to help other families whether they are close relatives or not? I think you can help everybody to make this woeld a betetr place and that is what I am teaching my kids.
1 person likes this
12 responses
@checapricorn (16061)
• United States
12 Jul 08
Hi snoopy,
I don't see any wrong to what you have done..Sometimes, we need also to consider other people out there! What are they going to do with those since as you have said, it's not with their sizes..
DOnt feel bad about it, you have just done the great thing and that rule for me is unfair...I guess, we have the right to choose whom we want to help and it will not be good if all the time, it will goes to the family even if it will not fit to anyone of them!
@checapricorn (16061)
• United States
12 Jul 08
To answer your questions..I distribute it to friends, relatives and the rest, I will sell them at a lower price!
@sudalunts (5523)
• United States
12 Jul 08
I usually donate items that I no longer wear or need. Unfortunately, I lost my job two weeks ago, and decided to have a yard sale to help generate a little spending money.
I held the sale for two days, friday, and today. Yesterday we did not do too bad, today, there was hardly any buyers coming by.
So, all the extra clothing that was not sold, will be donated to
red cross clothing bins.
We had a lot of glassware, cd's, kitchen items, books, and a lot of other odd and end items that we did not sale. We made three big boxes and put a take me I'm free sign on them.
One lady and her son came by, that lady took everything, except the books,only because she could not carry anything else.
She was dropping things as she tried to get to her car.
I'm glad she found things that she wanted, but I think it would have been nice for her to just take a few items, and leave something for someone else.
@meleshia (624)
• Philippines
13 Jul 08
I guess there are really some people like that, right? Yeah I think it will be good if she left some for other people. Well, I just hope she makes good use of all those stuffs and not just leave them in her garage or something. 
@Thoroughrob (11742)
• United States
15 Jul 08
I do, I usually give it to anyone that can use it. I don't offer it to people I know can't. I can't imagine why his mom would have a problem with that.
@venkygec (783)
• India
13 Jul 08
Well! As such I never went to any poor families to donate any items they need..
But yes when they come to us in search of help... i do help them with what they want.. We give them old clothes, vessels, food, etc... But we never give them money.. we ask them what do you want in place of money....
@jcj_111776 (3216)
• Philippines
17 Jul 08
Helping someone in need is never wrong. As long as it's done in the right way and at the right time. Your mother-in-law must understand that you're free to choose whomever you want to help, besides your husband's extended family.
At least she came back and apologized to you. But she should try to understand your side and why you're doing it. If I was in your shoes, I would have done the same thing. Knowing that those items won't be used by them anyway. So, I might as well give them to those who really needs it.
In my case, I regularly check the items at our house. Clothes that doesn't fit anymore, old books, and toys. I've given most of these things to those who needs it. I don't believe in just storing them away and let them collect dust.
Let's just hope that after that incident with your mother-in-law, she should at least not expect you to always have to think about them first all the time.
You're doing great with your kids. In teaching them in such an early age the value of helping other people.
@penny64 (1106)
• Australia
17 Jul 08
I think your mother-in-law is looking for something to pick on. Why would you offer things to someone who can't even use them? Perhaps you had better dump ALL your garbage on your mother-in-law's doorstep just so she can go through it daily and make sure there's nothing in there that she wants ... LOL!!!
Seriously, it is wonderful that you gave your old items to people who really needed them. When I'm sorting out older things, I normally pick out clothes, toys etc which friends and family might want, and the rest goes to charity. Even clothes in bad condition can be made into cleaning cloths, or recycled into something else.
Thank goodness you have passed your beautiful sense of giving on to your sons.
@trish32 (1471)
• United States
13 Jul 08
We do help out family, but also help out friends and strangers in need, too. When I was growing up my family went through some really bad times. I remember, just as if it were yesterday, one Christmas when I was very young. Our family was flat broke, had just relocated to a new town where my father was supposed to have a job lined up. It turns out he didn't have the job and we had spent every penny we had on a little apartment and just enough groceries to last a couple of weeks. If it weren't for a neighbor of ours spreading the word around about our situation we wouldn't have had a Christmas meal or any gifts. She told some of her fellow church members, family and friends and they all put together a food basket and brought gifts over. Not only did we have a Christmas, but we ended up having enough food to last until my father got a job a couple weeks later.
I've always felt, perhaps because of the kindness of those people and the lessons my mother taught us, that it's our duty to help out others in need when we can, whether their family, friends, or total strangers. After all, if we were the ones in need we wouldn't want to not be considered just because we weren't family. If that were the way it was "supposed" to be, then that neighbor so many years ago would've dismissed us merely because we weren't her relatives.
I say do what you feel is right, regardless of what your family members think. If they were not able to use the things you had, or weren't in need, then there's no reason that the things you had should go to waste or go to them. I say good for you for doing what you can!
@bluishrose (2289)
• Philippines
12 Jul 08
Honestly before I use to sell my stuff to earn extra and buy new ones. But when maturity came I realized instead of selling it why not just give it away to those who are in need. When I start doing it I feel so bless for not experiencing what they are going through. I thank god for being a blessing to others.
@jesbellaine (4139)
• Philippines
13 Jul 08
Hi There. Yes, we do donate some stuff to those needy people as long as they can use it. My mom doesn't really sell our old clothes, she just bag them and donate it to some charity but most of the time, we usually give goods like noodles etc to those people as well or some toys to the kids. Cheers!
@halynn (1809)
• United States
12 Jul 08
I often take our things that were getting rid of to the rescue mission in town. I also give some of the clothing to my cousin who has children younger than my son bc she has 4 kids & I money is tight for her. The company that i work for every year for Christmas takes up donations for needy families-usually $. Everyone just gives what they can afford. We do this instead of doing a gift exchange or anyting like that. I like that a lot.
@tzuria (31)
• United States
13 Jul 08
Most of the time when we are getting rid of old things, we donate them to a thrift store like Goodwill or Salvation Army. Sometimes I give clothes to friends as well. We never throw anything out, we always try to pass it on to someone who would like it. You can even make tax deductions by donating things to others. :)
@ANIKETRULZZZ (106)
• India
13 Jul 08
ya i do help others by giving them my old use product like pant's, t-shirt . i usally give them to my servants and his alone son.i save my pocket money a donate a bit to a needy people whom i think will really worth my money.have a nice day.
