To me,parents is nothing!

@ifglan (1152)
China
July 14, 2008 6:12am CST
Friends,it's summer vacation now,and it just begins,i know it't the hardest holiday for me,every second,every day,i'm struggling to live,oh,don't worry,i'm not meaning to do that,i just want to tell you,i'm a person ,a single person,parents is parents ,brother is brother,in the world,just i myself is belonging to me,i want to lead a life with myself,i don't admire big house,cars and money,i will depend on my self,why i'm now like that,mainly because i can't feel any warmth from the relationship in the family,if they love me,why they always don't consider of my feeling?They have their own benefits,it's not love to me,i'm so weak and thin ,they just can't read me....that's ok,parents is nothing.
8 people like this
33 responses
@neildc (17251)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
14 Jul 08
I know what you feel. But you must remember that family is still family. You can never be a person without your parents. And you can never be a better person without their guidance and care. You can live your life alone, but in the end, you will still go back where you once belonged. And it is your family...
2 people like this
@ifglan (1152)
• China
14 Jul 08
Thank you for sharing
@vanities (11410)
• Davao, Philippines
14 Jul 08
ohh..im speechless my dear friend and cant understand why you had such sentiments on your parents or family...why not try talking it out to them on whats really bugging you about? just remember you will not be here in this world if not because of your parents..
@ifglan (1152)
• China
14 Jul 08
Thank you for your response
1 person likes this
@gemini_rose (16192)
14 Jul 08
I have seen a couple of discussions from you recently in which you seem to be really down about things, I hope that you are OK. I am not sure what you are trying to say here but I am guessing that there has or is some trouble within your family. If there is then I am sorry to hear it, being part of a family can be extremely hard and stressful, spend much of life trying to please them. But sometimes we can only please ourselves and be happy for ourselves and not do things just to make others happy, take care xx
2 people like this
@ifglan (1152)
• China
14 Jul 08
Thank you for your response
1 person likes this
@MizukiZHR (611)
• China
14 Jul 08
Hey,friend.I don't know what happened between you and your family but I can't agree with you.To a person family is the most important thing and parents are the most family members before you get married.Parents love their children and raise up their children.You may lack comunication with your family and you should tell your parents what you really think and I think they will understand your feeling and change their ways of treating you.
2 people like this
@ifglan (1152)
• China
14 Jul 08
Indeed,my family is a family lacks exchange and communicating Thank you for sharing
1 person likes this
@salonga (27834)
• Philippines
14 Jul 08
I'm saddened by you thoughts. I could not picture what kind of family you belong to that you seem to live alone by yourself and even considering your parents nothing. There is nothing like a happy family where children are feeling the warmth of love in a home filled with care and sweet fellowship. But maybe you have reasons and I'm not in the position to judge you. All I could do the most is to pray that in the end you reunite with your family and patch up all the differences and feel the real sense of having a family.
2 people like this
@ifglan (1152)
• China
14 Jul 08
Thank you for your response
1 person likes this
14 Jul 08
imagine every time when i tell someting to my parents,they just can not understand me ,or even deny all of my thoughts,maybe i would own the same ideas as u . maybe not every time,but even one time can make one down. i can share your feelings. finding a good listener is not a easy thing,even they are your parents. For your feelings,i think they are very nomal.And for your relationship with your parents, try to comunicate,or find someting else to do and let it be.
1 person likes this
@ifglan (1152)
• China
14 Jul 08
Thank you for your response
• Malaysia
14 Jul 08
For me, my parent are very important to me. They grew up me nicely, educated me well, take care of me frfom time to time. I wouldn't forgot their goodness to me. So if possible, I hope to be with them all the time and take care of them like the way they take care of me sincee I was young. May be different family different case.
1 person likes this
@ifglan (1152)
• China
14 Jul 08
It's not like you said,indeed,my parents love me,and love me deeply,so the problem will occur,cause they love me so everything they want me to listen to them, i feel my life is not mine,maybe you can't feel for Thank you for sharing
@ctrymuziklvr (11059)
• United States
14 Jul 08
I didn't look at your profile for your age but I'm sure you must be young to say that parents are nothing! Did you ever think it could be your fault that you feel no warmth from you family? Take my word for it ...one day when your parents are gone you will miss them.
@ifglan (1152)
• China
14 Jul 08
I know what you mean,and i also know my parents love me,but i want to say in my family we children don't have any right to choose a life of myself,everything they must let me follow them,i feel my life is not mine Thank you for your response
@neilchua (888)
• Philippines
14 Jul 08
don't say that. though i don't exactly know what happened between you and your parents. they are still your parents. someday, somehow you will be reconciling with them. sometimes you will need to go through difficulties in life alone. can't argue with you if you feel that way. life is hard, and to some even harder. there will come a time when they will realize how important you are. and you will also realize that whatever happen to your relationship with your parents is for a reason. don't give up. proving that you can do it on your own actually is good. but someday you will need them or they will need you. someday you will both need each other. have a good day ifglan.
@ifglan (1152)
• China
14 Jul 08
Thank you for your response
• United States
14 Jul 08
I understand you do not think your parents give a rip about you. If that is the case then you are right you can only count on yourself. Do you have anyone eles in your life that is their for you? Another person you can call mom or dad? I had some terriable parents to and I met this woman and she has been my mom now for 10 long years. She is their for me no matter what even if I need to just talk. You need to find someone like that. Everyone needs sometie of gudiance. I would talk to your parnets and ask why your feeelings do not matter. good luch my friend!
@ifglan (1152)
• China
14 Jul 08
Thank you for your response
@metschica25 (5405)
• United States
14 Jul 08
Dear Friend , I am sorry you feel this way and it is sad to hear that you are so unhappy , and lonely . I know you may feel like your family does not care , but they do . They just might not know how to show it in the way you want , or the way you need , and I am sorry . It might be the times in which they grew up , and what they were taught . Never give up trying to be you , and living the life you want . I hope one day they can give you want you need . I hope you meet some friends out there , because this world can be a scary place when you dont have anyone . Oh , and know you must mean alot to many people out there , so dont be scared to reach out to them .
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
14 Jul 08
i can't emagine how you feel right now but i only can say be patient thats all. you shall get what you wanted.
1 person likes this
@rosema (1145)
• Philippines
14 Jul 08
Hi ifglan my friend, I dont know what is happening between you and your parents that you can already say that they are nothing. For me, I love my parents very much, and i will do everything for them. not just my parents but also to my 3 sisters. Family is very important to me, and i priorities my family before everything else. thank you and i hope soon you will be ok with your family. have a nice day and keep smiling
@mommyboo (13197)
• United States
14 Jul 08
Do you live on your own or do you still live WITH your family? I gather that you feel they do not listen to you, they are not giving you any choices, and you feel that your life is not your own. What can you do about this? I see that you're 23, do you have a job, income, money? I was 20 when I moved out on my own, I love my family but there came a point where I could not live with them any longer. When the rules and boundaries became too restrictive, I moved on. When kids grow up and become adults, there is no guarantee that they will still agree with the way parents see things, and often this causes conflicts. This is one reason I don't believe in extended family continuing to live together, unless somebody bends over backwards to cater to another person or ALL the people can give each other space and never get into each other's business, it's impossible for each person to be exactly who they want to be without getting hassled, heckled, restricted, in arguments, etc.
1 person likes this
14 Jul 08
Hello ifglan, I am sorry you are feeling like that, have you tried talking to your family? I'm sure they care and love you, Maybe you don't tell them anything so they think you are ok and not worry about you too much. You have to talk your family or someone in your family your are closer,don't despare ifglan, you will soon fine a way to feel love and warmth again, I pray for you and light a candle. Bless you. Tamara
1 person likes this
@acevivx (1566)
• Philippines
14 Jul 08
Dear Ifglan, I read your post and I feel concerned that opne who seems so young appears to have such a hopeless outlook on life and believes that parents are nothing. I hope this is just a passing thought and that deep in your heart you really do not believe that parents are nothing. I read in one of your comments that you know that your parents love you so what's wrong? Remeber, as parents they always will think of your best interests and the decisions they make, while not to your liking are usually for your own good. You must accept that while you are still young and living with your parents, that you are under custody and responsibility and it is also your obligation to obey them and respect the rules which they make. In fact even when we leave our homes when we are old enough to do so, this does not remove from children the obligation to love and respect their parents. Dear Ifglan, don't feel so bad if they discipline you. Look at it as a show of concern for you because if they didn't care for you, they wouldn't bother to discipline you and make you toe the line. They will just let you be and can't care less if you throw your life down the drain. Give them a chance and open your mind and see that it is not as you perceived them as not caring for you. Be happy.
• Malaysia
14 Jul 08
why u cant feel warmth from them? they dont talk/ communicate with u? then u can start it up by talking to them... They don care u, u can care them... U r here in this world just because of them... I used to have no topics in between my parents, but now i did... i really do what i told u, what u acpect from them, they might expect from u as well, start ur first step of building relationship.. they are human, they need care as well...
1 person likes this
@msedge (4012)
• United States
23 Jul 08
It is normal to have misunderstanding towards family member but i'm sure they love you.Be strong and happy!
• Japan
15 Jul 08
hmmmm.. I am also a father of a daughter like you. My friend, don't make any harsh statement like this in your life to repent later about what you said. You are too young to see the life in its fullest. And ofcourse, you are one of my best friend in myLot to whom I might have answered frequently. When you become a parent, give all the love you have in your mind to your kids. Do love without seeing what you get in return.
@zhaosonghan (1039)
• China
15 Jul 08
Oh,my friend,I know you,you had had a trouble that your parent opposed you and your boyfrind are together.It's cause of affliction?Parent are all the same that they consider what is right and you must do under their mind,and i know parent hope we are happy and have a good life,but they don't know what we really need,they often do somethings but we don't like,they think it's right,they give me less right to choose.The cause of that they have "experence".However,we grow up under the parent's help,they help me to do all the things,they think it's good to do instead of us,so we have no experence,and parent consider our decideions are wrong!We are undertand who i am, what do we love to do,they don't know at all!I suggest you don't saddly,all will pass,and you will be happy,you should be fact all the issues,you can slove them,I believe you,you can do it!I hope you will be happy and get blessedness which is belong to you!