friends or boyfriend?

Hi purple, That is sad! Anyway, This is a hard question for me but I will try not to choose anyone and try to work out the best not giving us my friends or my boyfriend.If I have a good friends, I know my bf will accept them and be interested to join the group.. In your friend's case, we do not know the reason why her boyfriend doesn't like you guys...jealous or whatever? I guess she is just unfair to all of you for not even talking why she need to detached herself from the group and what's the reason why her boyfriend is not comfortable with you! Anyway, I know she is still valuing the friendship but it seems that she is just controlled! Just wish her the best that her bf will never control other stuff that she enjoys and she used to do!

Hi purple! Your story sounded like mine too. I might sounded like Im in favor of your friends action but the incident you cited has also happened to me, my friend and my bf. Honestly, it was almost exxxxxxactly as you statedbut I and my friend have already talked about that and I even told her that I really don't noticed her even she has this very loud voice. You might say that it was impossible but those things really happen specially whne you and your bf were having a good time or chatting while you were passing on the street wherein one of your friend was also there. I don't think that you're friend does not like you anymore, she might be spending more time with her bf because that is the way she wanted it to be. And if ever she was being restricted to see you she can still be the one to decide whether to see or not to see you. You know purple, things really changed as time passes, we must also accept that we don't owe our friends and that time will come that you will have to seperate from one another. it was hard but that's reality. Though it does not mean you were no longer considered as her friend. Im sure she also misses you and she also wants to have time with you. MAybe she is just busy with other things from now. Now, to answer that question... It is really hard to chose. I would rather not chose any one since I can talk to them both and have some arrangements on both friend and boyfriend. Although we must accept that sometimes boyfriends were being prioritize than friends. And the friends must be given a good explanation why you can spend the same amount of time as like before.

Unfortunately this sort of thing happens, but i think good friends can pull back a bit when there are boyfriends come into their lives, boyfriends come and go but real good friends are there in your life when needed, i guess what i mean is a good friend steps back to let you grow but if the friendship is strong they drift back from time to time....two is company three is acrowd so to speak...

It really shouldn't be an issue. It's like asking someone to choose between his father or mother.

Sadly to know that you have one friends wasting the friendships for his boyfriend, maybe she is afraid of losing his boyfriend if she has made contect with you and your friend group, dunno what happens to her but wish you praying for her goodness, and forgive her, hopes one day your friendship in group can be much better with her need to return. Personally i can't pick one of them as my boyfriend/girlfrien or friends, both of it means a lot in my life, if i should choose, i would say no for the option!

what if your friend's boyfriend like someone from your group and the one that was really avoiding you or avoiding his boyfriend is your friend.

I can never choose between the two, but most of the time, I will stick to my man because he is generally honest with me and he is always there for me.

I think she is avoiding you sothat her boy friend should not misunderstood you as her boy friend or she is really too busy with her boy friemd to see this world. I would say ITs LIFE. You have no other option than to accept it. My dear friend thie is one blow of life and you are so scared. Forget her, you will get many others, concentrate on your life and make it independent of anybody. my good wishes with you.

My boy friend was my course-mate last time. We knew each other as course-mate at first, after that became friend, after some time of communication, we feel that we can be together to be partner, at last become my boy friend nowadays. I think mostly wouldn't choose boy friend purposely from the friends. But among the friends, if you feel match with certain guy, may become boy friend.

There are times when childhood friendship changes and it is hard to cope with. My friend just continue to live your life. Maybe she realizes that she does not need your friendship anymore or that when you started attending college your character has changed. What I would advice you to do is to assess when the difference has begun and then you can accuse the boyfriend. If he is at fault. I know alot of my friends as changed since high school and their character is not one I would like to socialize with. If you are the same person that you were and have not changed then maybe she was just using your friendship to achieve what was there. Such is life and one day she will be able to explain the situation to all the gang members that are disappointed.

Oh! Sorry to hear about your friend... I also have a friends when I were in high school, we are a group of 6 but when we went to college we never seen each other anymore.. I think it will really happen especially if we are going to separate with them... High school days are really different in college, everything had really change.. Now, I already graduated my bachelor degree I had never seen my friends anymore we don't have any communications... Sad to say but it seems that even our friendship is already gone... Regarding with your question, I won't choose among of them because friends and boyfriend were both important to me.. It is hard to choose someone especially if that person is really a big part in your life.. I think it is up on how you handle the situation.. You only need to be fair enough to your friends and with your boyfriend.. You only need to have a time management so that you can have enough and fair time bondings with your friends and with your boyfriend.. You don't need to choose... I know that it is hard to do but if we just try and do the right things then I think we can do it..

I do agree with you purple. Things change when we enter college. We meet new friends and sometimes leave old ones. Despite that harsh fact, don't ever forget that once a friend is always a friend. She may leave you for now but someday she will come back to you. Just be patient and wait for her to come back. I'm sure that it will happen because I was in your friend's situation a couple of years ago.

this is a tough question huh well i will not choose coz my bf & my friends are important to me.. they are always by your side.. back to your post, well it really shows that your friend is not worthy about your friendship, coz she changed.. friends should be there for you through thick & thin no matter what happened they are always at your side.. for me even i have bf, im still there for friends. & i will explain to my bf that he should not treat or think about bad things to my friends coz they are good or something like that.. but for me they are both important to my life & i will not choose between the two..

I think friends and boyfriend have their own places in ones life and only one can decide that either both or whom of them are important for her.For me both are important i can't leave any of them and if my boyfriend is really good than he will not tell me to leave my friends.

to me,friends are more important than boyfriend.i would not apart frome my feriends because my boyfriend.

I don't know why your friend is not responding you for your friendship.im so sorry for you that she is avoiding you .Its enough you just forget it and carry on your work ahead you dont keep worrying for her after all she is not worthy for your friendship, i have come across such situations in my life.She might be your better friend but GOD will bless you with a best friend because Best comes comes only after BETTER !

The african proverb said that"twenty children cannot play together for twenty years.Purple it not possible for all of you to stay together for ever. the only wrong thing is that she left in a sort of hawkward way. Have it in mind that situations either good or bad seperate friends. Expect that to happen, even between you and the rest of your friends. I want to believe that your friend has her reason maybe she just will not share it with you. but know for sure. nothing last forever including friendship.

i know exactly what are u fell... unhappy this happens almost part of time.=/ me too have a group or around 30 persons in school and we always walk together. when we dont have something to do we just go to school find the friends and do something. now everybody have take you own way and of that all people just some still in groups of 2-3 this is sad =/ my friend and me have organized one party and calling all the classroom say on orkut msn and some others way but only go 9 counting with me and my friend. i think this is the natural order of the things... we cannot choice to be together forever. but we still have the power to make our own choice and change this fate! look for you dear friends and i'm surely she will answer if her is truly you friend! be friends is like walk with bike (this is right? "walk with bike"? bad english xD anyway i hope u understand)... we NEVER forget =p

My friend did this once to me. We were such great friends and then he started dating this girl that was double his age. She didn't want him hanging around with any of his friends as he would start to act "childish". Or I guess his age. He constantly blew me off. I saw some of his other friends around and asked if they had seen him or spoke to him and they all said no, he had ditched them too. I live by the moto that boyfriends/girlfriends come and go but friends will be there forever. Sure enough after 4 years of not seeing him, they broke up and he expected me to still be there for him. I don't think so! I have never done that to my friends and never will. I cherish them too much.

My girl friend want very much to be with me rather than with her friends. But we are special couple, because we are in different university in differet city. We can be together for only about 3 days a month. I spoil her more than her friends, and she do everything for me because she take our world as the whole world.