Has Mylot become a laundromat for washing dirty linen?

@zandi458 (28102)
Malaysia
July 26, 2008 3:08am CST
We all have dirty secrets. We all have nasty tales to tell. We all know lots of things we'd just as soon forget. By why do we sometimes bring out these junks to mylot for the world to see. A secret is no longer a secret if it is being debated here in mylot. There's something in most of us that likes to hear this kind of gossip, and worse, to pass it on. Believe me, if we weren't willing to hear it, it wouldn't be told. But mylotters are good counselors and debators who are more than willing to lend our ears to others miseries.Dishing dirt requires someone to listen as well as someone to talk. Mylot says we can discuss anything under the sun but does that mean we wash all our dirty linen here? Do you?
4 people like this
16 responses
@movicont (495)
• United States
26 Jul 08
Well, I think it depends on how the person posts it to myLot. Are they mentioning names? Are they doing it wholly anonymously? Sometimes people bring up these discussions because of the anonymous nature of the internet. It makes it a good place to ask for advice on things you have a hard time discussing with people in real life. People on the internet won't be able affect you as much with their judgments since it'll be easy for you to ignore them. Also, if someone needs advice on a secretive matter, people on the 'net can give advice and won't end up spilling their secrets--after all, they have no one to spill to. However, I personally find it annoying to see such topics. Perhaps it's because I'm not really interested in the personal life of someone I don't know. Others' personal lives are usually rather bland anyways, unless they happen to be friends I know in real life. I'm also more interested in discussing occurrences on a more massive scale (things that would appear in the news) than those on an individual scale.
3 people like this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
26 Jul 08
I think that is the point here, discussing with anonymity. But has it given a satisfactory respond that can alleviate the problem. I wonder how many discussions are problem based here. Sometimes it is sickening to read other peoples problem when I myself is facing 101 problems that are not solved. It only burdened the mind to read someone else problems.
1 person likes this
@irishidid (8688)
• United States
26 Jul 08
I don't say anything here what I wouldn't say to my kids. What belongs private should stay private.
2 people like this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
26 Jul 08
There is always limit to our private life.
1 person likes this
• India
26 Jul 08
I don't think there's anything wrong in discussing whatever you want on Mylot. Keeps the site's charm of being an open space alive.
2 people like this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
26 Jul 08
Very true. It is my personal opinion though.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
26 Jul 08
I definitely agree with you. We should put limits on what are the things to be put for a discussion. However, we can't really limit those members who still want to disclose their stories to the public. Again, I must say, it is not proper to be that open especially on sensitive issues that involves the poser or worse, someone he/she knows. Mylot I know is not only a community for happy things but also for any other kinds of situations. Just a friendly piece of advice, we can never be sure that these things will not backfire to us. Let's be cautious. PS. This is a very smart and practical post.
2 people like this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
26 Jul 08
Thanks for that compliment.Everyday when I log in here I will not miss seeing a discussion of a very personal and sensitive in nature. It is not my business to discriminate such kind of posts but merely to pour out what I think about this. Well there might be people who are interested in life's tawdry tales. With most people, it's probably enough to think that "washing Dirty Linen should only be done in the laundromat - to remind yourself to change the subject.
1 person likes this
@roanne05 (1290)
• Oman
26 Jul 08
for me, if they wanted to discuss certain personal issues it is up to them. i will just read it if i feel it and even comment if i also feel it. i think if they are not willing to make their life an open book they will not post it here. i feel like some feel comfortable because we do not know them personally. we cannot black mail or anything to them. it is a good way of releasing stress and tension. also i agree there are some discussions that are out of hand. but it is up to you if you will patronize it or not by making comments. good luck!
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
26 Jul 08
That is one good thing about mylot, there is freedom of writing here.
1 person likes this
@TessWhite (3146)
• United States
26 Jul 08
I may be one to share a small part of my life, but there are some things that are personal and they will stay that way. I must admit I am one that is rather appalled by some of the topics here discussed in such great detail. I tried using the "filter" but it filters everything that is marked mature content - whether it really is or not. One topic here I won't mention by title was so graphic it was disgusting to read. I realize we may have questions about our lives or lifestyles, but do we really need to post it all here for everyone to read? Some things are personal for a reason, and should be kept that way.
2 people like this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
26 Jul 08
Our personal problems are for us to keep and to be solved by us alone. Exposing it to others will only give us contradicting ideas which only makes it more complex.Though it is nice to share but not all.
1 person likes this
@KrauseHome (36448)
• United States
26 Jul 08
Well, personally for me, there are limits on what I will and will not share on here, and even topics I have seen discussed on here I would never reply back too, but personally on any Blog you see online a lot of the time these days, you will see things posted there on almost any thought, and a lot of times, unless you subscribe to that Blog, you could never respond or offer back any hope either. The good thing about a site such as this, is that we can come here and talk about almost anything and find people we can relate too, and learn from on here as well. There is a lot of Great advice I feel that comes from here as well. When I see something that I cannot agree with, and give feedback for, I tend to leave it alone and move on to the next discussion. I feel that is the best one there for me.
2 people like this
@greysfreak (1384)
• United States
26 Jul 08
I am somewhat open on mylot, but not extremely.. like I wouldn't tell my deepest and darkest secrets. Although, I'm probably not the best example because my life really isn't that exciting as far as "dirt" or gossip go. Besides, I'm working on being a singer, and I want to make it far, so I definitely wouldn't go around saying stuff on here that I wouldn't want possibly repeated in the future if I am successful. That would be terrible. But I don't mind other people talking about stuff, I mean, sure.. sometimes I wonder how people are brave enough to post some things, but we all have different levels of open-ness. Besides, even if I did have good dirt, I invited my mom to the site and she now posts, so I definitely wouldn't post anything like that. It's definitely a balance to talk about things but not tell *too* much.
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
26 Jul 08
Yes, you're a good singer, I just happen to check your profile and listened to your songs. By the way have you heard of slicethepie? It is about singing and getting review from public on the singers talent. So keeping your personal life to your chest is good for you as an upcoming artist, you will be a public figure soon and there all eyes are on you.
1 person likes this
• United States
27 Jul 08
aww.. thank you, I just put that up on my profile last night, I had been searching everywhere for a player that would allow me to upload! Anyway, yep, I was actually trying to sign up for slicethepie because I read about it on here, but the page kept failing on me, I will probably try it again soon, because it looks very interesting! I have such a hard time promoting myself, so I definitely need as many sites as possible! Oh definitely, I do worry about my personal info, although I've come to the conclusion that the best way to be is fairly open, whenever possible, because most the time the media will dig up stuff on you or just make things up.. so right now I'm thinking it's better to be open and honest, then again, I really don't have anything too interesting to get around. haha
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
this is a good discussion, somehow my life has been exposed in the world already because of mylot..i had talked about everything maybe because i needed someone to comfort me when people around me cannot..where in some matters i cannot discuss with family because its a secret or i just cant spill it all out to them that easy...lots have read my life already but i guess i'm not that willing to expose all informations specially confidential matters in here..i still got more that i prefer to be kept hidden or if not i talk to friends in private about it..
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
26 Jul 08
hi zandi458 No I dont dump all my dirty linen outfor all to see. I am pretty much a private person and will not share some of my problems with mylotters.If I have'some small problem that may pique others interest and possibly help other people too I may air it but its not in the dirty linen category at all. I usually pick topics that are of interest to all such as my last one on too much text speak in discussions. My own dirty linen is hidden in my own closet and not a topic for mylotting. There are so many interesting topics out there to discuss that airing my own dirty secrets is sort of silly.
@Ldyjarhead (10233)
• United States
26 Jul 08
I agree with you. I have email friends that I've known for years and I might talk about problems with some of them, but certainly not in an open forum like myLot. I've seen some things here that are pretty pathetic. Sad ...
2 people like this
@sk66rc (4250)
• United States
26 Jul 08
I think most people need to vent somewhere... We all have some degree of fear that the people aound us will judge us for the problems we have... Psychiatrists are after all, strangers with medical degree... But a lot of us, ok not all but most, don't see the problem with opening up to them... Basically what I'm trying to say here is that SOME of the problems that are brought up in here seems like simple enough that just venting and/or talking it out, getting it off the chest, is simple enough solution to it without being judged... Even if we are, sadly enough, since we all are strangers, we don't really mind as much, all we have to do is just turn the computer off... If some of us can use this as a means of getting things off their chest to help them move on with their lives, so be it...
2 people like this
• Australia
26 Jul 08
People who puts their dirty laundries here on mylot, I supposed, are in desperate situations...where they need every possible help they can get to get out of their sticky situations. They probably feel a little bit comfortable talking about their most darkest secrets here, knowing that the people here don't really know them personally, hence their identities can still remain anonymous even if their secrets are being shared to everybody here. Its only embarrassing to tell your most darkest secrets to somebody personally known to you because that person can actually judge you and their judgement will definitely have an impact on you because you know the person. But if you will be judged by people here whom you don't know anyway, it will and should not matter as much, because of your intact anonimity. If you are the type who loves to help others, then this is your place to do so as there are so many here who are actually begging for advices. If you're the type who loves to gossip, then you can pick a lot of possible gossips here, but because you really don't know the person or people involved, what harm can you do?
@valeria1 (2721)
• United States
26 Jul 08
I love your inputs! You always get to the point. I believe that the one that have the problems is the one that can solve them nobody else. I know for fact that psychiatrists cost a fortune per hour, so imagine that you have this place here to discuss your bad life for free! hahahah. I do not put anything about my personal life first because I have enough personality and do not need nobody to tell me what to do. Second I do not believe that others can really help me with their opinions. I try to post positive discussions and I tell you is very hard to get people looking at, but when it comes to misfortunes oh yeah they are the top ones! Another thing I sometimes think that people do that so they get points I do not necessarily believe in what they are saying. They just post something to get sympathy and here we go, numbers up!
2 people like this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
26 Jul 08
That is true. No body can help us with our personal problems. It is only us who know the true nature of our problems can get to the root of it and thereby solve ourselves no matter how deep is the problem. Discussions that are more fiction and crappy are more popular here. I understand that as long as 2 people responded to your post it will receive credit. Of course if you have many people responding to your post then your popularity and rating automatically goes up and it speaks volume for the income as well.
1 person likes this
@Lakota12 (42600)
• United States
27 Jul 08
No I dont. as I have none I Want to share wioth the world! and I would prefer not here read others dirty seacrets .
1 person likes this
@Elixiress (3878)
26 Jul 08
I don't see a problem with it, whether it is a dirty secret or clean secret, people need advice. Sharing a secret with someone online is different to offline, because it has more dangerous consequences offline and people will judge an individual a lot more harshly in real life in my opinion. I think that people's dirty linen is quite interesting, however I have none to share.
1 person likes this