Suggestions please!!!

My youngest son - He will be turning 6 on July 30. How time goes by.
@dhangski (3194)
Philippines
July 27, 2008 10:23pm CST
[b][i]My youngest son will be celebrating his 6th birthday on the 30th of the month. I asked him what gift he would like to receive. He answered, he would like to have a bicycle. I told him, I don't want him to have a bicycle because it's not safe. I don't want him getting hurt (as all moms do). He's good in sketching and art works. And I'm planning to buy him an art set, which will be useful for his development. My question is, am I right not give him what he really wanted on his birthday? Or should I push through on buying him a bike. I'm really confused at this moment. I wanted to be happy on his special day, yet I only want him to be safe. Any suggestions on what to give him aside from art set, that would really excite him? Have you ever ben confuse on what to give to your child? Everyone's welcome to suggest and share. Happy postings to all. Hugz![/i][/b]
13 people like this
55 responses
@sudalunts (5526)
• United States
28 Jul 08
The purpose of asking someone what they want is simply to get them what THEY want. It is not fair to ask someone what they want, and not getting it, what then is the purpose of asking. Your son is definitely old enough to have a bike. Training wheels helps them to learn to ride on their own. At six years he shouldn't be riding without you around, so you will be there if an injury occurs. We can not stop doing things in life because we are afraid of getting hurt. If that was the case most people would do nothing. Explain to him the rules of bike riding, and everything will be okay. Wishing him a happy birthday
3 people like this
@dhangski (3194)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
I think your right about that. Thanks for the suggestion and for the greetings. HUGZ!
1 person likes this
• United States
28 Jul 08
I am one of the biggest worry-wart mothers on the block, but yes you should get him the bike. Every child deserves a bike, it's like a right to childhood thing. However, buy him pads and a helmet that he must wear everytime he rides the bike. Your little boy will think that you are the best in the world and he will feel like the luckiest little boy too. If he doesn't know how to ride without training wheels, then make sure that there is training wheels. Designate him an area to ride in with visual boundaries. That will cover your safe issues pretty well. Sincerely from one anxiety ridden mother to another....Amandalyn
@dhangski (3194)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
Thank you so much amandalyn for enlightening me. I will consider your suggestion. Keep posting. HUGZ!
1 person likes this
@capirani (1841)
• United States
28 Jul 08
Bicycles are just as safe as the training and instruction the child gets along with the safety devices such as helmets and knee pads, etc. It is a part of life and a rite of passage. Just like getting old enough to drive. If you are not able to let go enough for him to have a bicycle at this stage, will you be able to let go when he is old enough to have a car? Sooner or later he is going to have to learn the rules of the road and how to keep safe. Accidents happen on bicycles, yes. But they happen doing anything else too. You cannot protect your child from everything, and there is such a thing as being too over protective which can lead the child into a big rebellion come those teenage years. It is actually much easier to teach and train a child the rules of safety when they are young than it is when they get older and think they know it all. That's my opinion anyway.
2 people like this
• China
28 Jul 08
i can't agree with you any more!
1 person likes this
@dhangski (3194)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
Thanks for sharing your opinion. HUGZ!
1 person likes this
@magojordan (3254)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
If you have the money why don't you buy him a bike, but I'm suggesting you that you get him safety equipment and always watch him whenever he plays with his bike. I think an art set is good and he would be happy if you give him that but if he really wants a bike I think it's good you let him learn how to ride it.,
2 people like this
@dhangski (3194)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
Thanks for responding my dear friend. He already knows how to. But the problem is we live in a farm-like where there is stones everywhere, and we have no gate. The only place he do it is in the main road wherein it is cemented. But I guess, I have to be with him if ever I would give him the bike. And I will buy him also his art set. Happy postings! HUGZ!
1 person likes this
• United States
28 Jul 08
I have 3 kids and I worry constantly about all of them! But, every kid should have a bike. As long as you teach him to ride it and teach him how to be safe, he'll be fine. My kids all got bikes by the time they were 4. There have been wrecks and "road rash" but they have all come out pretty much unscathed! And, they still ride them! I would buy the bike. Good luck with your decision!
2 people like this
@dhangski (3194)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
Thank you so much. I guess I have to give him what he really wants but of course, have to buy protective gears also. HUGZ!
1 person likes this
• United States
28 Jul 08
I'm always confused on what to get my son. I don't understand him as well as I do my daughter. As for what you should get him - I think you should get him the bike. Almost all kids ride bikes, and for the most part it's very safe. If he's never ridden before, be sure to get one with training wheels. Also be sure to get the safety equipment - helmet, kneepads, and elbow pads - they cover the most fragile parts of his body. Try to find a set of safety equipment featuring his favorite character. Not many children actually wear them, but they usually are legally required (that's just a law that is frequently overlooked). Make sure you're very clear with him about the safety rules as far as riding (i.e. not to ride in the road, to look both ways before he crosses a street, etc). As long as you're there with him, especially in the beginning, a bike is perfectly safe for a boy his age. I would also go ahead and get him the art set, to encourage his creative side as well - but then I almost always go overboard on the birthday presents!
@dhangski (3194)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
Oh thank you so much for your tip. Maybe I should buy him both. The bike will be his dad's gift and mine was the art set. HUGZ!
1 person likes this
@selece (2357)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
Hello my friend! You're pretty much restricting him that way. I know you want him to be safe, but it's a part of growing up that they want to explore new things,and determine their capabilities. You can deal with the "safety" issue by accompanying him as he learns to ride the bike, do not let him ride it alone, not until he is already good at it or has the state of thinking where one is capable of keeping himself safe at all times. My dear friend, it's actually part of him growing up. And the there is even a saying that "no one learns how to learn a bicycle without falling". I had the same experiences when I was a child. So there, please think about it. It would make him happy but I do know how you feel about it. Safety always comes first. Anyway, any gift would be appreciated, I'm sure. Good luck! Regards to your son!
2 people like this
@neildc (17251)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
28 Jul 08
This is just my opinion and I don't wanna be misinterpreted here. I don't usually ask anybody especially my kids on what do they like to have or what present they want from me on their birthdays. The reason for this is I don't want them to be disappointed. I don't believe I can give them all what they wanted. And besides, I have no such funds to give them that. What if they ask more of what I have in my pocket (which is most of the time is empty. LOL). I can't think of anything more for my kids, if only I have enough money to give them their happiness, I will.
1 person likes this
@neildc (17251)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
28 Jul 08
By the way, my best. Happy birthday to him.
1 person likes this
@dhangski (3194)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
I understand my best. But in my case, my husband asked him what he wants for his birthday, so my husband sent a budget for it and at the same for his party at school. Thanks for the response and for the greetings. Hugz!
1 person likes this
@diansinta (7550)
• Indonesia
28 Jul 08
Hi there dhangski, When he got his bike, you will never see him at home, he will be wonder around with his bike at friends house and spending his energy to use it on bike. So when you consider to allow him having a bike, we need too supervise his action for more. Good luck!! oxox'dian
1 person likes this
@dhangski (3194)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
Thank you for sharing your opinions on this my dear friend diansinta. HUGZ!
1 person likes this
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
h!.. i think give what he want.. cause he will learn.. about the good and bad from what he've want,,, and he will explore from it... me...i have my little sister,,, and she is 3 yrs old.. and i give what she wants.. and she knew a little bit from the object that she wanted to use... after using of them... she learn more...she explore... and some bad happen... but i explain why it happens... and after that bad happens... she never wanted to use it... thnx muneyuki here
1 person likes this
@dhangski (3194)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
Thank you so much for helping me decide. Happy myLotting! HUGZ!
1 person likes this
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
Hi there my friend! I'm sure everyone hopes for the best when it comes to their kids.Well,the point of asking your son of what he wants for his birhtday is for you to know what would really make his day. If I were in your place as a mom,I would let him have what he want. In the case of safety,maybe you can set him a rule or limitation,if he really wanted a bicycle he should follow certain safety precaution. You may explain to him your worries,and you should try to make him understand the risk and consequences.Rules like no biking outside busy streets,or where so ever. Danger is everywhere we all know that,be it a bicycle or a toy. I hope this make sense to you my friend.
1 person likes this
@dhangski (3194)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
Thank you so much! I'll be talking to him about this. I'll set some rules first. Keep posting! HUGZ!
1 person likes this
• Japan
28 Jul 08
There is nothing great for children to get what they wished. You give the sky and heaven, they won't like it, if they wished to have a stone from sea shore. That stone is great for them, because they wished for it. For all moms: Don't push for what you like to have them own. It is the desire of the small mind and as a mother you have the responsibility to provide it. I remember the same situation, when I asked bicycle and my mother told against it due to safety reasons. I got it finally approved from her. The pleasure of getting what we wished is great. And Let your son have those feelings.
@dhangski (3194)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
I will. Thank you so much! HUGZ!
1 person likes this
@howard96h (11643)
• New York, New York
28 Jul 08
I would get him the bike for sure. There are childhood memories that we all remember and cherish, learning to skate and getting our first pair of skates, getting our first bike, different sports equipment etc. This is part of growing up. You can always monitor where he rides to make sure that the area is safe and you can also buy him a helmet if you wish but I would not deprive him of this, I am sure all his friends have a bike. Remember we have all been there, now it's his turn.
1 person likes this
@dhangski (3194)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
You're right. Thanks for enlightening my mind. HUGZ!
1 person likes this
@neilchua (888)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
well i guess being hurt is part of life. and yes you should give him the bike. it's actually a good thing because having a bike means he will be playing outside and not just concentrate on those playing consoles which most of the kids nowadays are addicted to. learning how to ride a bike actually develops his balance. and i guess learning to actually ride a bike is one of the best achievements that a kid could ever have done. have a good day dhangski:)
1 person likes this
@dhangski (3194)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
Thanks you so much neil. have a good day too. I'll consider your option.
1 person likes this
@anex08 (868)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
Hi dhangs!! I think you should give your son a bicycle. It is true that parents does'nt want their children to get hurt but it's the only way they could learn great things through their own experience. if they get hurt, they should be more careful and cautious in doing things that they enjoy. We should let children explre if needed and let them go so they'll see the beauty of life and that way they will learn to appreciate more the advices us parents give them. Don't forget, experience is the best teacher ever, remember when we are still children, we love to explore things and that way gives us specific knowledge of some mystery that we uncover itself. Just a piece of advice... happy posting
@dhangski (3194)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
Hi anex08. Thanks for the advice. I'll keep that in mind. Happy posting too. HUGZ!
1 person likes this
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
Good day dhang.. you have a charming son. Honestly, you shouldn't ask him what he wants if you have already something on your mind. You should have surprise him, that way he'll not be disappointed by not getting what he ask for. Anyways as for being safe, I'm a man when I was a boy that exactly what I'd asked for my birthday and I got it with the condition that I'll only bike if no.1 I have someone older to accompany me outside our house. 2. That I would ask permission if I've decided to bike outside of our house and 3. most of all biking on the street is strictly off limits and if I ever caught breaking one of this rule I have to say goodbye to my bike. Those were the conditions I agreed upon and I upheld it till of course I got older to look out for myself. He wants a bike and if you can give it to him why not? It's better he learns under your supervision because I believe whether you wanted to or not he'll learn it somewhere else and it might be in an unsafe place. Believe me peer pressure and curiosity are strong motivators. Just give him sets of rules that he needs to follow and an agreement that if he breaks any of it even once he'll loose his bike. Anyways the last say is yours, you can also ask his father and your friends about it. Good luck.
1 person likes this
@dhangski (3194)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
Thanks for the suggestion and for helping me decide. Have a nice day. HUGZ!
1 person likes this
@bookworms (351)
• Pasig, Philippines
28 Jul 08
well if i wer u i will give him what he wants.... but ill the the one with the training wheels and some safety gears so he wont get hurt too much... if he fall or something ....
1 person likes this
@dhangski (3194)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
Thanks for the suggestion. Have a nice day. HUGZ!
1 person likes this
@salonga (27830)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
Hi friend! If bike is what he wants then go and give him if you really want him to be happy on his birthday. But to make sure that he would always be safe, don't allow him to go biking without anyone watching him. And also tell him you would give what he wants provided he will follow the rules you are going to set in using the bike. My son was 4 when he asked for a bike and he got it but he was never hurt because someone would always be watching him whenever he went biking. At the age of 7 he got a new bike again for his birthday and he also did not get extremely hurt except for some minor falls that did not really hurt him to the hilt. Hurting once in a while is but part of growing up but for as long as we are monitoring, it will always not turn to the worst. The key is for you to really keep an eye and be strict in implementing your rule.
@dhangski (3194)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
Thank you so much my dear friend for the help and for sharing your opinion about this. I really appreciate it. Hugz!
1 person likes this
@TessWhite (3147)
• United States
28 Jul 08
I see no reason not to buy him a bicycle. He is certainly old enough for one. Just be sure to get him a good bike helmet too. At the age of 6 my son was already attempting to jump his bike off ramps. NOT something I wanted him to do, but he has always been a bit of a dare devil. Besides, he has to learn sometime right? I say go for it and make him happy.
1 person likes this
@dhangski (3194)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
Thank you so much TessWhite for helping me decide. HUGZ!
1 person likes this
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
its normal for all moms to worry about their children because of the love and care that you want for him/her.for me you should bought him a bike in that way your son will notice that my mom loves me so much and im sure that he will appreciate it too much if you bought him what he want.if you buy him a bicycle,guide him in doing it and show some concern about him,in that way your son will feel that my mom is concern about me she does'nt want me to get hurt.in childhood days most of them is looking for appreciation,love,care,concern and many other things.being good parent to his/her son/daughter will binds you closely and in that way both of you will have a good reationship as parent and son.
1 person likes this
@dhangski (3194)
• Philippines
28 Jul 08
Thank you so much ghidz for sharing your opinions on this. HUGZ!
1 person likes this