how do you know if the love is still there!!!!
By bern28532
@bern28532 (1)
United States
August 1, 2008 1:53pm CST
Hello I am a twenty three year old black male.Living in this world trying to do whats right in least my eye.I am married I have been for a year but we have been together for five years.I am currently in the United States Marine Corps.I am just trying to understand. is it normal after awhile that sometime you pretend to care or just do or say whatever to make things right?I don't understand because we really don't communicate but we try to make sure things stay on track but its hard.We have kids so i'm sure thats what keeping us together!Does anyone kno wha I can do to improve my marriage cause it seems it is slipping quik.I am trying to be a better man and fix it before it slips to far away!!!!
2 people like this
4 responses
@turtlegirl (148)
• United States
4 Aug 08
You must be able to communicate and hang out with a person first and foremost. When everything else fades, this carries you through. If you can't wait to be with this person when you get home, if you both still laugh together and play together, if they are the most fun you can have in a night, if they are the person you can't wait to tell every secret you have to, if they are equally glad and excited to do all these things with you, then you know love is still there, on both sides. If you are finding yourself drifting, you are lacking something from the person you are with. You need to communicate. You need to talk all the time with your partner. If you have nothing to talk about, then...
Ask him to tell you what his plans are,watch him talk rather than listening more to what he has to say.
Fix problems up if you can ,but if not just hang it up my dear. @Hatley (163772)
• Garden Grove, California
2 Aug 08
hi bern I am an elderly widow who has seen a lot of life, and I think you and your wife need to see a marriage counselor as it should be more than just the kids that is keeping you two together. Does the marine corps have some sort of family or marriage counseling or a chaplain that offers some king of marital help. you two need to be able to talk to eachother and someone who is not a family member, like a chaplain or counselor would be inpartial and help you two to get on the same page. best of luck and good wishes.
@Amanda81587 (3042)
• United States
1 Aug 08
Well Bern28532 first of all I would like to welcome you to mylot.
I would love to help you with your situation but I am not married.
I would suggest maybe doing something together that would spark the relationship again and if thats not available to do since you are in the military. I would say when you talk to her talk about the past. Like when you first meet and the good times. 
Just to remind her of why it is that you two married. Just a little walk down memory lane! Hope this helps and sorry I couldnt be of more help! Add me if you would like!
I would love to help you with your situation but I am not married. I would suggest maybe doing something together that would spark the relationship again and if thats not available to do since you are in the military. I would say when you talk to her talk about the past. Like when you first meet and the good times. Just to remind her of why it is that you two married. Just a little walk down memory lane! Hope this helps and sorry I couldnt be of more help! Add me if you would like!