I really don't think I like being on the second generation...

@reinydawn (11649)
United States
August 6, 2008 10:36pm CST
As we get older, it's a fact of life that our older relatives die. You know, they're they ones that are (normally) a branch or two higher than us on the family tree. Well, our top branches are getting pretty close to me and my generation and I really don't like it. On my mother's side of the family, I am on the (precarious) 3rd branch down. My grandmother is the only person left of her generation and once she goes I'll be on the 2nd level. I'll be the next-oldest generation on the family tree! I'm already there with my fathers side of the family, but my grandmother has always given me that "cushion" feeling by being on that top generation. Well, today we lost another member of the family on the 2nd generation. My uncle - my mother's brother - passed away after complications from routine surgery. It really makes me see how close to being the oldest family member I am. One of these days I might be in my grandmother's place, the oldest person in the family, with no one of my generation left. I was talking to my cousin - my mom's the oldest kid so everyone was calling her all night, I just went over to help out with the phones. But, anyways, I was trying to remember the last time I saw my cousin. He doesn't make it to the family reunions, so I'd say it's been 6 years or more since I saw him. I'm sure he vaguly knows who I am, but we were not close growing up - in age, location or in knowing each other. It really just hit it home a bit harder for me how important it is to make it to as many family gatherings as you can. The last time I saw my uncle was last summer at our family reunion. We're in the midst of planning our next one now and my cousin is planning on coming now. This getting old thing is for the birds!!!!
2 people like this
4 responses
@sunshinecup (7880)
7 Aug 08
I'm sorry to hear about your Uncle. Yep getting older, bites BIG time! On my father's side, me and my brothers ARE the top branch, have been since I was 12, so that doesn't bother me much. But on my Mom's side, it's just her and her siter & brother, then there sits me & my brothers. I don't like that much. What's worse is in two years in a row, I have become......GREAT AUNT!!! EEEKS!!!! I have already made my mind up I will not be Great Aunt Kelly, nor Aunt Kelly, just Kelly. That's my way of escaping the reality a bit It not the gray hair that bothers me, I love mine and I will never die it. But it's the other things that come with that top branch, that seem to be coming fast. My eye sight for one. I no longer just wear my glasses for reading, but when ever I want to see...that isn't cool. I noticed that getting up in the morning has become a painful event, sore back. Now I'm noticing I'm starting to really sound like my mother more and more everyday and I catch myself saying things that start off with..."well when I was kid..". *sigh* yep, I agree getting older is for the birds.
2 people like this
@reinydawn (11649)
• United States
8 Aug 08
I feel really old when I say "I remember when Grandma gave us a quarter and we'd go to the news stand and buy a lunch-bag full of candy." But I have a lot of great memories too. So that's a good thing! My nephew's sons call me Aunt, not great aunt - although I am a wonderful one! My kids also call some of my cousins Aunt because it's easier.
• United States
7 Aug 08
I sympathize with you! :) I'm going thru all of this right now myself. Both of my paternal grandparents have been gone for a while...but I just lost my grandmother (Mom's mom) in April, and just got the news today that my grandfather is going...probably sometime within the next week or two. (Heart complications with Alzheimer's). My mother's parents are divorced/remarried-and their respective spouses and a handful of grand-uncles and aunts is all we'll have left of that generation. (And the spouses aren't faring much better themselves.) It's the way of life though-the mantle gets passed from generation to generation. Definitely makes one stop and think about this life...My husband and I have been holding off on having children because the time, or the money, or the situation, "just wasn't right". Everybody keeps telling me if you wait until you're "ready", it'll never happen. All of this really brings that home. My grandparents-none of them-will ever know their great-grandchild(ren). Not on this earth, anyway-I think they'll always be looking out for us. :) I guess I've been having a bit of a pre-mid-life crisis of sorts-thinking a lot about the passage of time and how important it is to use it wisely. It's up to us not to drop the torch. :)
@reinydawn (11649)
• United States
7 Aug 08
Your words have rung so true, and yes, don't wait until you're "ready" because that may never happen. We've been very blessed that my grandmother is still with us. We actually have 5 generations. My grandmother, my mother, my sister, my nephew and my nephews 2 sons. That is really cool that our family was able to experience that. I know we wont see 6 generations though.
1 person likes this
• United States
17 Aug 08
Reiny I am so sorry to hear about your uncle passing. It is so sad to lose them like that. I am in your boat, the third generation out, once granny goes we will be in the second generation out. Granny is now 90 and has a bad heart. We are getting to the top of the tree
@reinydawn (11649)
• United States
28 Aug 08
While I was away, my grandmother came home from the assisted living facility. She was there because she had fallen and hurt her hip or something. I'm so glad she's back home!!!
1 person likes this
• United States
2 Sep 08
It is always good to know when they are home if they can take care of them selves. My Granny how has decided she cannot walk when she goes out. She wants to be pushed on her walker. She sits on the seat and has my sister push her. What a pain in the butt. Granny will get nasty at times but not as bad as she use to.
@rae777 (110)
8 Aug 08
Sorry for you loss. We were just talking about this a couple of weeks ago because I have lost 2 relatives this summer. I don't like this feeling. I am not ready to being on the top branch. I don't mind getting older. I just don't want to lose my relatives because I love them and I feel they are what is keeping the rest of us together. I feel that once I hit that top branch things will change for the rest of us. :(
1 person likes this
@reinydawn (11649)
• United States
8 Aug 08
I know exactly what you mean. Although I have done a lot of the planning and things for our family, I always know that I'm not "in charge" because I have older relatives who take precidence. I'm going to miss that and I'm so not looking forward to it. Our family reunion this weekend will be seen through different eyes.