No More Roommates...
By twoey68
@twoey68 (13627)
United States
August 11, 2008 9:16am CST
Over the years we’ve tried a time or two to let ppl live with us. It’s always turned into a nightmare. I don’t know if it’s just that I’m hard to live with or if it’s that I have a low tolerance to other ppl.
My youngest brother and his g/f lived with us twice and both times it ended badly. I’m responsible and tend to keep things picked up and put away, she’s the type that drops it where she stands and leaves it there. While I like the PC I take time to do other things like shower, cook, clean, run errands…he likes to park on the PC and leave everything till the last second (and it often doesn’t get done). I also try to budget money and pay bills first, they like to eat out all the time and go shopping. So it didn’t work out.
Another time we let one of our previous foster kids stay with us. That didn’t work out. He stayed up all night reading and watching TV and then slept all day long. He liked lllllloooooonnnnnngggg phone calls and staying in the bathroom for hours. He also liked getting on the PC and going to gay websites trying to meet ppl…and having them call him…on our phone. So that didn’t work out either.
We now just have the two of us here. We’ve agreed that the only way anyone would move in with us is if it was my Niece and/or Nephew if something happened to their dad.
Would you let someone move in with you? What’s been your worst roomie experience to date? What’s your one exception if you weren’t going to let anyone move in with you?
**AT PEACE WITHIN**
~~STAND STRONG IN YOUR BELIEFS~~
10 people like this
26 responses
@coolseeds (3919)
• United States
12 Aug 08
Fortunately my house isn't big enough. However if it were large enough there would have to be some rules. They would have to contribute. If not then they can freeload at their parents house. I need my space.
If I had to pick up after them their stuff would go into the trash. They would have a room to do as they please. If I wanted to clean up after someone I would adopt a child.
I've shared apartments with relatives, friends and total strangers. Total strangers make the best roommates. They have been more considerate and do not try to get away with things that relatives will do.
I don't have any horror stories.
I've shared apartments with relatives, friends and total strangers. Total strangers make the best roommates. They have been more considerate and do not try to get away with things that relatives will do.
I don't have any horror stories. 2 people like this
@34momma (13882)
• United States
11 Aug 08
things turn out badly when you don't put the rules down on paper before a bag comes through the door. i have had people stay with me a few times. i have not had anything end badly, but i have had people stay with me that didn't do what i tought they should have done. and they didn't do it because we didn't say what the groud rules where up front.
so the next time(which i doubt ever again) i have someone live with me, I will have in writting what i expect, and what i will not put up with. so if these rules are broken they are out on their A$$
@sweetdesign (5142)
• United States
11 Aug 08
I am the same way. I thought it was just that I am hard to live with or something. I have had some truly nightmare experiences cause I am so soft hearted and try to help people. One time I let a cousin of a friend of mine moe in cause she had no place to go. The agreement was that she was to do housework, watch my kid (my daughter was 6 at the time)after school and help with the groceries till her disability came threw then she was going to also help with the house payment. I worked fulltime and had to walk back and forth to work which added another hour or more to my work day as I walked across the town we lived in to my job as a baker/cake decorator. Instead of taking care of my kid she taught my 6 year old and her cousins 6 year old (the girls were insepereable at this time) how to use the microwave to fix their own meals, she would make them wait on her by shaking her glass for them to get her something to drink and she rarely ever did any housework. the disability never came in so she never helped with the bills, it got so bad I thought about moving out in the middle of the night! Finally i just told my friend that her cousin had to go so they found someplace else for her to live that only lasted one month before they were tired of her. She was with us for 3 months.I have had other nightmares also. Right now it is mom me and my daughter and the only one we would let live with us is my nephew or one of our good friends.
2 people like this
@jezzmay (1845)
• United States
12 Aug 08
I room with my son and his wife.So far everything is good.
We have our own computer,his wife and I are on the computer
at the same time.We have laptops and we share time together.
we share cleaning.Our bed times are about the same time.We
seem to get along.She has a older disabled son,who stays up
all night,and sleeps all day.We just basically leave him
alone.
1 person likes this
@gemini_rose (16264)
•
13 Aug 08
I have had a couple of people live with me over the years, they were only friends but I found it really hard. I lived on my own from the age of 17 and was an only child and I found it really hard to accept anyone else coming into my space.
I was always very tidy and they were always so messy and so it never lasted for more than a couple of weeks. I learnt my lesson and have never allowed anyone to stay since! Mind you saying that, I would not have the room to have anyone to live with us anyway, all our rooms are full.
1 person likes this
@sudalunts (5523)
• United States
11 Aug 08
I know exactly what you mean. My husband's oldest son stayed with us. First of all, he is the type that thinks it's all about him. He would drink up everything in the frig and not buy anything to put in it. He wouldn't leave a litte left he would drink it all. I remember one day I could not finish a pepsi in the bottle, put it in the frig, went back later for a drink and it was gone. It was him, my husband does not drink soda.
I came home from work one day, and all of my linens were removed from the closet, so that he could put all of his toiletries in it. He would stay up late watching tv, cell phone ringing at all hours too. I fed him everyday, and he never offered a penny towards the household.
He also would wear the loudest smelling cologne, that really affected my allergies.
When he was home he would not interact with my husband and I, he was too busy on the cell phone. I got tired of collection agencies calling my house for him, and since my husband and him have the same name, it became rather aggravating.
He's gone, good riddance, see ya later
2 people like this
@Polly1 (12644)
• United States
11 Aug 08
Its so hard to have people live you you. I am an expert at it. Right now I have my son, DIL and two grandkids living here with me. Mostly things are fine, but sometimes I have to bite my toungue, for the sake of family harmony, and peace. I would like the house kept together more then what it is, my grandson can be messy sometimes, same with my grown son. Years ago we did have someone stay with us, it turned out to be a nightmare. This women was homeless and helpless, she had no money, had a broken leg and no place to go. We had her on our couch for 9 loooooong months. This women being at my house caused so much harm to our family dynamics, it truly was a nightmare. If I had known how it would be I would not have let her stay, but we didn't know what to do when she called. And to top it all off when she finally got her SS, she did get herself a place, didn't give me any money and worst of all never said Thank You, needless to say I no longer talk to her, and don't want to neither.
1 person likes this
@lovespecialangel (3632)
• United States
8 Sep 08
It sounds more like you are set in your ways and thats why it never ends good. It's not bad, I am the same way. I couldn't let anyone live me except my kids. I like things done a certain way and since it is my house and my computer, when I want on it, no one better be. I like my house a certain way and I have a certain way of doing things. Any one living with me would either have to do things my way to take the highway. I know that sounds mean, but I'm old and set in my ways and I'm not going to change. There is no way I would have a roommate living with me.
@reinydawn (11642)
• United States
12 Aug 08
I haven't had many roommates. The first time was great! We got along great, barely bugged each other over anything. Only one problem every I think and it was very minor. She used my curling iron on her hair thinking it would straighten it - this was after she applied her gel. No biggie, she did buy me another curling iron.
Another time I offered a girl a place to stay in exchange for babysitting while I worked. That lasted about a month then she decided I was using her - she got almost free room/utilities. She moved out and took my TV with her.
We've talked about renting a room out, but I don't know that I want that invasion of privacy...
1 person likes this
@highflyingxangel (9225)
• United States
12 Aug 08
I really hate living with other people. I just can't stand some people. I've lived with my family and 5 other people over the years. That's since I've started college. One of them was OK but turned into an annoyance once she thought I was trying to start drama then she turned evil and moved out. I had another roommate that was nice but hardly there. However one of her friends stole one of my school books and sold it so I lost out on a book and the sell back money. Now, the other roommate I have currently is just one huge nightmare. She wants to have pity me parties anytime something in her life goes wrong, she constantly throws temper tantrums when she doesn't get her way and locks herself in her room. She tries to ruin our days whenever she has a bad day because she can't stand it when someone has a better day than she does. She is the nightmare from heck and I really can't stand her but the thing is, I'm kind of stuck with her now unless she decides to move out on her own.
1 person likes this
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
22 Aug 08
Hubby and I have had only one roommate in all our 17 years of marriage and I've gotta tell ya, it's our last!! He was such a hypocondriac but a manly man and a know it all, oh gosh I could go on forever but I won't. The only way we'd have a roommate is if it were one of our family members and maybe a close close friend but that's it. Never again will we take one in with such arogance like the one we took in.
@Linda4ualways (2282)
• United States
11 Aug 08
Well that is a touchy thing there. It's sad to say but there are certain family members that I definitely wouldn't want to live with me and that is why I pray that they wouldn't have to but push come to shove, I would like to think that I would let them in. You always take a chance with letting people live with you whether they are family or not.
Different personalities, home ethics, and lifestyles are all elements that have to be dealt with when allowing people to stay with you. It is a wonderful thing opening up your home to others but can also be a pain in the azz. Take care twoey and God Bless!
@fluffnflowers (1594)
• United States
11 Aug 08
We've currently got my guy's sister living with us, and it's a royal pain but she's not nearly as bad as some of the roommates I've had. The last roommate I had, living on my own, I ended up having to call the police on because she had a child in her room (which wasn't allowed, to begin with) that she had illegal custody of. She'd also let the trash sit in the kitchen for two weeks while I went on vacation. Just a nightmare!
I've decided that there will be no further roommates, regardless of where I have to live. I like things done my way and don't want to have to pick up after other people and listen to their noise. I definitely have a low tolerance for people living with me!
@pehpot (4762)
• Philippines
12 Aug 08
I have lived with my sister and so far we have no problem with it. Because they listen to e, but afar from my sisters I wouldn't want to live with anyone else. I am a control freak type and my sisters are the only that can live with it.
@academic2 (7000)
• Uganda
12 Aug 08
I think I would find people with funny mannerism like your foster kid really hard to tolerate-I have a few relatives who come have their school holidays with me-they watch TV from sunrise to 2 am, they live lights all day on, and these are not energy savers-they are 100 watt bulbs and electicity bills are always on the high side!
@carolbee (16230)
• United States
18 Aug 08
Sounds like you experienced a major nightmare all 3 times with roommates. Don't blame you for not another roomie into your house.
Just the two of us here. Our 3 kids moved out when they married. One did get divorced and moved back here for a year but that wasn't the best experience for any of us. Our grandkids live out of state and are little. My husband, myself, the cat and dog are here and it's peaceful and rather quiet.
@lucy02 (5015)
• United States
11 Aug 08
I have never liked the idea of someone living with me. I was 39 before I got married.
I just did not think I could live with someone or they could live with me. My mom lives with us now and that was my one exception. I don't think I would feel comfortable with anyone else. The only other time I have lived with others was when I was in college. One roomate I had worked out very well. Then a friend of mine (and former roommate) from another college decided to move to where I was attending and room with us. The three of us living together did not work out well at all. Those two did not get along and of course that created tension for all of us. Just a bad situation.
@checapricorn (16060)
• United States
11 Aug 08
Hi twoey,
[i]Wow...Good thing it's over I can feel the relieve living with those type of people..
ANyway, We have not tried to have roommates in our house, MY dad is not comfortable asking relatives to stay with us, he likes a lot of privacy and so far no relatives also asked to stay with us since everyone was living with their own family..
But, I have tried renting an apartment with my Sister during our College years until we got a job...It was hard since we will be meeting different people with different attiudes!
What irritates us before are the roommates who don't want to help in cleaning and those who are not particular about cleanliness, those who are bossy and those who don't respect other people! But, we have to adjust..LOL! We had a lot of meetings each year for rules and we do have some follow up once in awhile, it helps a lot too![/i]
@MOMMASAM (1003)
• United States
12 Aug 08
i think the older i get
the more set in my ways i am.
i've never had a room mate
well, i've had 2 husbands that became that !
but, never had to rent out a room.
i have friends who have rented out rooms
or allowed friends or relatives to move in
for short periods of time.
it just never has a happy ending !
