Do you like the way your mother love you?

@rytnlxm (310)
China
August 12, 2008 2:56am CST
My mother is a typical chinese lady.She is laborious ,virtuous and pay all her energy out for my family.She loves me in a selfless way.I work in another city far away from her and she calls me every three days.I used to tell her all my trouble because she is always here to help me whenever I need. But with the time going,there are more and more problems she can not give me useful advice.Sometimes when I was in the bad mood,she asked me why and try to help,but she was not know the situation clearly and explain to her is a hard work.So the talk always end by dispute. I am so painful,because I love my mom deep in my heart,but I don't like the way she loves me.I am now learning to be tought and try to solve problem by myself,and I decieded not to tell her all my touble next time. Do you like the way your mom love you?What is the relationship like between you and your mother?(Friends or teacher and student?) Or, if you are a mother,can you tell me what do you want to know about your child,the joy or the trouble?
4 people like this
29 responses
@lily3753 (390)
• China
13 Aug 08
Your situation is the same with me . I love my mother and my mother love me back .I still remember that when I was a little kid ,she took care of me and teached me so many . At that time I thought my mother can solve every problem , and I told every troubles to her . But after I growed up , I have learned many and many science knowledge and I can independent think . I have the thinking update the social ,but my mother is still have simple and traditional ideas .So we are not agree with each other in many times ,especially in work and wedding and something else . for example ,I majored in clinic medicine ,but I don't want be a doctor ,but I don't like to be a doctor, then after graduated, I became a project assistant . that make my mother so disappoint . She can't even understand me yet. though she love me so much ,but she don't know what exactly I want .
1 person likes this
@rytnlxm (310)
• China
13 Aug 08
Hi,lily3753.I admire you because you have the courage to pursue your dream.My major is information management,and I am now doing a relational job,but I dislike it very much so I want to have a change.Fortunately,my mom support me because she want me to be happy,so she collected the information for me.But that is the problem,she doesn't know what I really want and sometimes gives me too much advice and made me too tired.For example,she thought that civilian is a good choice for a girl so she told me to prepare for the exam,I tried my best but the result is not good.There are exam twice a year and I need to read the boring book after my work everyday. But anyway,I love my mother.
@EbbyLiu (16)
• China
21 Aug 08
yes,we have to admit that sometimes we are very boring about our mothers~!but because she loves you ,she did that as her way.though we don't like this way,but i think we should not upset her!i think we can't make her shut,but we can don't take her advice.Because she loves us ,she gives us advice!
@rytnlxm (310)
• China
22 Aug 08
Hi,EbbyLiu.We have the same family name.Nice to meet you here. Thank you for sharing. Have a nice day.
• China
23 Aug 08
thank you ~!i will!i hope you can understand your mother~!
@msedge (4012)
• United States
18 Aug 08
Don't say that.You said she helped you everytime you needed her but now that she can't able to. you said you don't like the way she loves you.One day you will become a mom and you will understand how is it like to be.Your mom loves you but she can only do her best to help you and sometimes her best is not good enough.I am a mom also.I have a daughter whom i love so dearly.She is my life and everything revolves around her.I try to give her everything that she needs and even her wants.I always wanted to see her happy but there were times that i fail to give her something in a certain time that i promised and i knew she feel disappointed about it but the good thing is she really understand me whenever i explained something to her.Shes on her teens now and i just hope, i can always help her everytime she needs me.Well,i always try to be be there for her and i will always will.
@rytnlxm (310)
• China
22 Aug 08
Oh,msedge.I wrote this post after my mom and I argued on something.Maybe I was still a little angry at that moment.I love my mom and after I read all the response you give me,I have realized that I am wrong,I should be more patient to my mom,because it is she who save money and send me went to college. Thank you for sharing.
@msedge (4012)
• United States
22 Aug 08
I am glad you feel better for your mom now.Take care!
@johnson3 (152)
• United States
13 Aug 08
Great discussion! It give and give with my mother. We didn't have a great relationship when I was younger due to some of her decisions. But now that I'm older and more in tune because I have children of my own, I understand everything that she tried to teach me. I got married very young and I also have younger sisters and my advice to them is that "mom knew what she was talking about". Not one thing that my mother told me or warned me about--I didn't see. I saw everything and when I encountered it God made sure that I remembered what she had said. Being a mother myself, I just want to have a better relationship with my children now so that it will be great later. I want them to know that I am there for them no matter what. I teach them now, what is right so that later they can be capable of choosing what's right later. I want them to come to me and not to someone that will destroy their confidence or mislead them. I want to know their success, failure, and troubles. So that I can pray for them and tell them to go to God and allow him to lead them on what to do and how to sustain. The best advice that we can give our children is the way we live our lives. johnson3
@rytnlxm (310)
• China
14 Aug 08
Hi,johnson3.I saw your children in your photo,I think they are happy and it is your achievement. Thank you for sharing.
@johnson3 (152)
• United States
14 Aug 08
Thank you. I try my very best to love them as I should. johnson3
@shinymood (406)
• China
13 Aug 08
Hi,there. I used to feel the same as you do. But now, things are different since i have my own babygirl. I can understand my mom's way of doing things by being a mom myself too lol. Our moms are brought up in a way that differs from ours. Maybe they are not fashionable or perfect moms like the ones we saw on TV, but they are the way they are. Since we cannot choose who to be our moms, it's wise to accept them as they are and see what we can do to make a happy family lol. Now that I'm a mom too, i try to be as good as i can. But i'm not surprised if one day my babygirl posted the same discussion topic in mylot lol. Good luck and happy mylotting!
@rytnlxm (310)
• China
13 Aug 08
Hi,shinymood.May I ask you another qustion?Do you have enough time to spend with your mother after you have your own babygirl?My grandmother has 3 daughters,and I think they paid more attention to their children.It is a pity that we understood our mom after we became mothers ourselves but we have no time to pay back for her love. Have a good day.
• China
14 Aug 08
yeah,since she's now staying with me to help me take care of my baby. Thanks for asking. Happy earning and posting!
• United States
12 Aug 08
My mother loves me, but when it comes to money, she has trouble with it all the time.
@rytnlxm (310)
• China
13 Aug 08
Many people are in the same boat with you,so you are not lonely. Thank you for sharing.
1 person likes this
• United States
13 Aug 08
Yes, I know. I know that my mother means well, and that she loves me a lot, and my brother when he was alive (anniversary week is this week and that is why I have not been on mylot that much), but she spends her money like there is not tomorrow and she does not save any of it or invest it. She really should.
@jheaps2 (15)
• United States
16 Aug 08
As a mother I can understand what your mom is going through. There's some kind of motherly instinct that comes out when your child is in distress. She wants to solve all your problems because she feels like that is her role in life. I would give anything to make my son happy. Everyone has to go through their own trials but she is doing everything in her power to help you get through it. She'll never understand all the things you are going through, so the only thing she can give you is love. Embrace it because there are so many people out there that don't have that! ~jheaps2
@rytnlxm (310)
• China
16 Aug 08
Hi,jheaps2.Maybe it is a shortcoming of mine that I was easily became impatient.I know my mom loves me and she does all she could only wants to help me,but sometimes when she can not get my meaning,I will lose my patient and get angry.After that I always be compunctious and call her to apologize.So I think I should change the bad side of my character. Thank you for sharing.I hope your son do better than me and can give you more understanding.
@jaffna (778)
• India
16 Aug 08
me too a sought of character like you...but i would worry too much for even simpler things of life ....i would like to tell both ma joys and sorrows only to ma mother though i have ma friends near by...the moment am upset,she is also upsets..she would call me frequently until am alright and she would cheer me up...mothers are always mothers..love her
@rytnlxm (310)
• China
16 Aug 08
Hi,jaffna,take it easy,don't too much attention on the petty things.It seems as if your mom is a good friend of you,so you are lucky. Thank you for sharing,have a good day.
@bellis716 (4804)
• United States
14 Aug 08
Please remember always that your mother loves you unconditionally and always wants only the best for you. Don't tell her your troubles unless you are ready to listen to her advice. You don't have to heed it, but once you have told her your problem, you are obligated to listen and consider what she says. Don't argue with her, ever. She may or may not be ready to be your sounding board to bounce your ideas off of. You may have to find someone else for that. She may be old fashioned in her way of thinking, but that way worked for her generation. Listen and consider.
@rytnlxm (310)
• China
14 Aug 08
Hi,bellis761.Thank you for your advice,I will be more patient to my mother. Have a good day.
@deemple (164)
• Philippines
13 Aug 08
being a mother is a tough job to consider.i wasn't treated by mother the way a mother should to her daughter,considering im a battered child in my younger days.now im a mother of 4 and proud to be a mom.i dont want my kids to suffer what i have gone thru,so i consider them my bestfriends and give them the right to be open to me,and have my trust and they are to me too.in troubles,i am to the rescue.but you have to consider too,that you are not growing any younger and you have to be considerate because your learnings are too far from what your mother has,just like me.it's just a communication gap dear.understand your mom.she has lots of things to think of,not only your problem but all problems in the family.should she cannot understand you about some,then,she must have bigger problem than you.be considerate.
@rytnlxm (310)
• China
14 Aug 08
Thank you deemple,I will keep your words in my mind,and I am sure that the relationship between me and my mother will be better after I saw all the response you give to me. Have a good day.
@newtondak (3950)
• United States
13 Aug 08
My mother was always very distant. I knew she was as we got older, but wondered about when we were small. I asked my sister why I couldn't remember my mother hugging or rocking or reading to us and things like that - she said I don't remember it because it never happened - our mother didn't do those things.
@rytnlxm (310)
• China
14 Aug 08
Hi,newtondak.There is another explanation that people always keep the painful memory longer than the happy one.
• India
13 Aug 08
Mother is the only person who can sacrifice her life for her child. Mother is a symbol of unconditional love. Remember, when you were a kid, how often did you irritate your mom. But she still took care of you, never ignored you and never stopped loving you. Now when you are matured, it's your responsibility to unconditionally love her. She tries to solve your problems which she can't apprehend, that's because her love for her child doesn't know any boundary. You are in her heart all the time. You have to understand that when you were a kid, your activities irritated her, but she managed you never tried to avoid you. Now time has come up to repay some of her love. If, sometimes you find her irrational, since now you are matured, manage her in a loving way. Let her feel that you understand her concern. Ending in a dispute isn't a good idea. Pl Control yourself. Make her rest assured that you are doing fine. As you love her, you must not hurt her rather give her as much comfort as possible by your acts and words.
@rytnlxm (310)
• China
14 Aug 08
Hello,tapnaroy12.I have known I was wrong and I should give her more understanding and just like what you said to manage her in a loving way.Sometimes,I can not control myself well,so I say something deeply hurt her.I know that means I am not mature enough,but I will keep your words in my mind. Thank you for sharing.
• Malaysia
13 Aug 08
Hey there rynlxm, I have a relationship with my parents similiar to yours. I always depend on them to solve my problems and expected them to know the answers to my questions as I always assumed that as people who have live long in this world, they should know everything there is need to know about life. However, this is not always the case and I realized that now. We need to solve our problems ourselves. Our parents lived in a different era and they do not have to keep up with the new trends and ways of doing things as they have already been successful by doing it the traditional way. What we need to do is discover for ourselves how to solve our problems.
@rytnlxm (310)
• China
14 Aug 08
Hi,koharukusumi.You are quite right.I know it is the time for me to solve the problems by myself,I just have not adapt that,I think I should adjust my thinking mode.
@subha12 (18452)
• India
13 Aug 08
actually with time many things changes. my mother very frankly speaking had never been so much liking me. she used to find fault with me. I will not say she is not at all caring, but she was like that. i was not her favourite i can say. with time some understanding has grown. but still i feel something missing
@rytnlxm (310)
• China
14 Aug 08
Hi,subha12.My mom always nags me and corrects me to do what she thinks right.Sometimes,it is really boring.But now I have realized that all my mother had done and tried to do is for me.Since your mother has changed her attitude to you,you should forgive what she has done and find what you lost in future.
@sanzi1201 (644)
• China
13 Aug 08
Sometimes,mother is a little nag.But ,we know that whatever she dose wants us to live better.Although she may not give us a good or useful advice ,she could give my courage ,confidence and comfort.I will be better.They are our supporters for ever,won't change.So,tell your mother what happend if you meet some difficulty.
@rytnlxm (310)
• China
13 Aug 08
Hi,sanzi1201.You are right,my parents always give me courage to face the difficulty because I promise myself to give them better life and I am now tring my best to do everything not only for myself but for them. Thank you for sharing.
@reckon21 (3484)
• Philippines
12 Aug 08
I love the way my mother love me. She is the most understanding, loving and considerate mom in the whole world.
@rytnlxm (310)
• China
13 Aug 08
Lucky guy,enjoy your happy life. BTW,may I have the phone number of your mother? Just a joke. Thank you for sharing.
• India
12 Aug 08
yes i do like the way mom loves me..she is the best person 4 me. i wish that always she wud be my mom..she realy have done much 4 me.
@rytnlxm (310)
• China
13 Aug 08
Hello,ManastheMatrix.Be sure to make your mom know that,as for me,I rarely do something or say something to make my mom know that I love her,and I am now recognized that I am wrong. Thank you for sharing.
@momz2gd (295)
• United States
12 Aug 08
Well I wish I had a mother like that, My mother is mentally ill and my step mother was cruel to me. Just hang on to her, she seems understanding and helpful. You seem that you want to deal with your own problems, which is fine. But unlike me, I grew up without a mother that cared and loved me.
@rytnlxm (310)
• China
13 Aug 08
Oh,momz2gd,I am sorry to hear that.You must be a strong person because there are so many troubles we have to face on our way to be mature.Think nothing of it and looking for the person who really care about you,good luck. Have a good day.
@APPCHEM (113)
• Pakistan
12 Aug 08
Few years back, i used to think the same way as you do.At that time i thought that why can't she give me some privacy of my own? Why she's irritating me about everything?Why she's spying on me for whatever i do& why she has to be over protective? But now the entire view has changed. Its only after becoming a mother i completely understood her feeling towards me....spending sleepless nights to look after me when i was sick........worried when i used to skip meal. Now i have understood the meaning of "motherhood". Living in a different country,made me feel the importance of her in my life. I
@rytnlxm (310)
• China
13 Aug 08
Hello,APPCHEM.I think I am fortunate that your and the other friend's responses made me understand my mom earlier. I have called her and told her I love her just now. Thank you for sharing.
@ersmommy1 (12596)
• United States
12 Aug 08
Yes I do, I am very close to my mother. We are affectionate to one another. I miss her terribly. She lives 1300 miles away. Since I cannot see her daily, we talk on the phone 2-4 times a day. My mom is very supportive, most of the time. My daughter is only 5, and my son isn't born yet. I hope they will both come to me if there is a problem. I want to be there for them both.
@rytnlxm (310)
• China
13 Aug 08
Congratulations,ersmommy1,so you are waiting for your son's coming?A girl and a boy,you are a happy mom.You mom must be proud of you. Thank you for sharing.