How well do you deal with sarcasm? IS it a lesser form of wit?

@James72 (26829)
Australia
August 14, 2008 1:54am CST
I am someone that I guess is pretty much known for having a sarcastic and somewhat cynical sense of humour. My mind also sometimes moves pretty quickly in this regard and before you know it I have said something straight after someone else's comment that can definitely be misread from time to time! Those that know me realize I mean no harm; but those that don't know me at first can sometimes be taken aback and I have to quickly move to ensure that they realize my comments are tongue in cheek. How do you deal with sarcasm yourself? Do you see it as immediately offensive and become defensive and hurt? Or do you not take it personally and shoot something straight back! I personally appreciate a healthy dose of sarcasm and as long as it doesn't get too personal am pretty much prepared to cop it sweet if someone says something sarcastic. A sarcastic exchange can actually be pretty fun and entertaining in my opinion!
4 people like this
21 responses
@DonnaLawson (4032)
• United States
15 Aug 08
I agree with you 100%.. I am a person who has a great sense of humor, I have to.. I also have friends who know they can say almost anything to me and I don't get upset.. I would rather joke and kid around than be a dried up old stick in the mud.. I responded to one of your post about the worth of a housewife and immediately got called down by another Mylotter because of my response, so I did fire back rather quickly.. I responded in jest and it wan't taken that way by someone, so I guess a few people don't respond well to a dry sense of humor, or any other humor for that matter.. I take very few posts seriously, as I know that most of us are not discussing our deepest most intimate thoughts on Mylot, so I believe most of them are in good fun.. I enjoy being entertained by my friends and their sarcastic remarks and believe most of them can take the return sarcasm in good humor..
2 people like this
@James72 (26829)
• Australia
15 Aug 08
Yes I know exactly what situation you are referring to here..... This is definite proof that some people just don't get subtle humour I guess. But so be it! It is these differences that make things interesting! A group of sarcastic people collectively digging at each other can be a LOT of fun! The challenge is in keeping everyone from going too far! Thanks for responding.
1 person likes this
• United States
15 Aug 08
I do sometimes go too far but so do my "real" friends.. We enjoy trying to get the best jab at each other.. We also try to outdo each other and can sometimes say things that take each other off guard, it is almost like a contest, but it is so much fun, especially when the other one has a totally straight face.. We do each know that the other one is just joking, and the winner is the one who is standing there smiling while the other one has his or her mouth dropped open.. I like to be the winner as well as the loser in this type of wit..
1 person likes this
• United States
15 Aug 08
I don't think it is offensive. It is only rude if you don't know the person. I always use sarcasm. They dont get mad they know I am just being me
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@James72 (26829)
• Australia
15 Aug 08
I agree, Sarcasm used against someone that doesn't know you can backfire very quickly! Thanks for responding.
• Australia
15 Aug 08
Well said Mr James 72, are we brothers dude? You have described me almost perfectly, I am known, [and my page at myspace testifies]as the 'Sultan of Sarcasm'. A Blonk is someone who can laugh at anything including themselves, play the fool without hurting the feelings of others, or crossing the line. I live for a bit of Sarcasm in my day to day life, look at the world and you'll see how important humour is these days....cheers Bro!!
@James72 (26829)
• Australia
15 Aug 08
Ah! A fellow Aussie! You have NO IDEA how much I miss the banter like this between me and my Australian friends. Australia is one such country where sarcasm is practically a way of life! I have not been home for some time and becasue I am in one froreign country after another I am constantly having to tone things down and explain myself. Praise be to the Sultan! Thanks for responding.
1 person likes this
• United States
15 Aug 08
I'm afraid I tend to be pretty sarcastic. Sometimes I am humoring people, but often I am the only one who sees the humor. And when someone is sarcastic with me, I will take up the gauntlet in a heartbeat. The best thing would be for you to test me and see for yourself, then you can let me know whether I am fun and entertaining or impolite, lacking manners, and full of vitriol, as so many others have accused me of being. If you judge me fun and entertaining then of course I will agree with you, but if you consider me the latter I will just say oh well, and write you off as yet another mere mortal who does not recognize divine humor when they see it.
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@James72 (26829)
• Australia
15 Aug 08
Oh there has been many a time when I shoot back a quick comment that as far as I am concerned is pure gold! lol. Yet because I am in non-English speaking country at the moment it goes way over everybody's head and I then feel somewhat deflated because no-one can share in my wittiness! I am what I am! Thanks for responding.
1 person likes this
• United States
16 Aug 08
Well, even though it is a very frustrating waste of excellent humor when your non-English speaking audience fails to grasp the profound nuances of your wit, it is even worse when your English speaking audience fails to comprehend it. At least the 'foreigners' have the excuse of not being familiar with the language, especially not it's subtle nuances. I think that the English speaking world's obsession with politically correct words and the tendency to take life so friggin' seriously has resulted in a society full of obtuse, stick-in-the-mud personalities - who laugh heartily at a fart joke but take offense at the slightest hint of sarcasm.
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@James72 (26829)
• Australia
16 Aug 08
Sad but true! People need to stop being so serious and concerned with political correctness sometimes and appreciate all forms of humour for what they are! And yes, it IS painful to share what you think is an extremely witty comment and have it completey ignored or misunderstood! lol.
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@mimpi1911 (25474)
• India
14 Aug 08
Hi James! I get what you mean. Yes sarcasm could be quite fun when between two quick witted people. Otherwise it could spoil the party or even the whole relationship! I kind of choose to use my wit. Like when I am with company who I know would take it in the right spirit I would retort or give back. Healthy humorous repartites make life so much fun! On the other hand when I am with people would would not understand the meaning of the sarcasm and get hurt, I choose to refrain from it outright. I would never like to see anyone hurt! Facing humor can be difficult and I have had my share of bad days. But now, I guess, I am wiser. I allow others to laugh at me and guess what I laugh with them! That makes things easier. It gets even more easier when we can actually understand our shortcomings. Many times our denials to obvious things upset us. I guess, I have learnt to accept the subtle sarcasm to some extent and growing with the spectrum of emotion that life has to offer. Happy living.
1 person likes this
@James72 (26829)
• Australia
14 Aug 08
I miss the type of people you are referring to! Seeing as I am working in a foreign country where English is a second language for most people; an absolute majority of my comments seem to go WAY over people's heads. I then have to back track and explain everything.... Sort of takes the fun out of it! I have a pretty thick skin myself and as far as I am concerned, you HAVE to be able to laugh at yourself once in a while! As long as the humour is never too personal and based towards me and not my family or something then I am generally OK with a roasting! Thanks for responding.
@mimpi1911 (25474)
• India
14 Aug 08
James yeah, tis happens with me as well. Sometimes it goes over the heads and I choose to change the context as fast as possible before the bitterness could be perceived. And another point that you have raised is very important as well. The differences in region, custom, culture play a vital role. You cannot get away with the same kinda sarcasm when in a different country! I get that, generally, you are fun loving guy who knows where and if at all to start or stop. That's the most important thing. Thanks.
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@James72 (26829)
• Australia
14 Aug 08
Thank you for the compliment! I would like to think that I am this type of person yes; but I do also find myself having to say to people that they need to let me know if I over step the mark! So for sure I do sometimes take things a little further than I should even though my intentions are harmless.
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@Modestah (11192)
• United States
15 Aug 08
using the definition of sarcasm I think that it is a malicious form of humor and always at the expense of another either by character or to reputation. however, I think facetious humor is pretty good.
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@James72 (26829)
• Australia
15 Aug 08
Being facetious is far more subtle I guess! But saying that sarcasm is malicious is a little harsh in my opinion! Yes it can be borderline but is mopstly tongue in cheek when used among people that do know each other. The only time sarcasm becomes malicious is when things get out of hand and people become defensive and then way too personal. In these instances I don't believe you could really refer to the exchange as sarcasm anymore! Thanks for responding.
@Modestah (11192)
• United States
16 Aug 08
from L.L. sarcasmos, from Gk. sarkasmos "a sneer, jest, taunt, mockery," from sarkazein "to speak bitterly, sneer," lit. "to strip off the flesh," from sarx (gen. sarkos) "flesh," prop. "piece of meat," from PIE base *twerk- "to cut" (cf. Avestan thwares "to cut").
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• Malaysia
15 Aug 08
I agree fully with you .. each individual comes with certain level of sense of humor and sensitivity .. At certain times some sarcastic remaks really hurts especially coming from people who we think do not know us.. For me if someone like this gives the sarcasm remarks which is hurtful, i will totally ignore the person and not entertain them .. for me being sarcastic .. not very often. Sometimes there are some people who are not smart but think that they are .. and straight to your face in public they will tell "STUPID" "FOOL" which is embaracing ..
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@James72 (26829)
• Australia
15 Aug 08
There is definitely a fine line you have to tread when using sarcasm; and there are also many people that do not tread this line well and end up just being plain mean. This is why it is so important to pick and choose how and where you use sarcasm. Using it among people that know you is a far safer environment! Thanks for responding.
@crazed_moma (1054)
• United States
15 Aug 08
I enjoy sarcasm. :) It's my favorite form of communication. lol I don't know what I'd do with out it. I like you expect people to know me to know I'm usually sarcastic.
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@James72 (26829)
• Australia
15 Aug 08
It's one of mine also! And having people realise that it is a personality trait and not a personal attack certainly makes things easier! Thanks for responding.
@ltsaxcash (197)
• United States
15 Aug 08
It really depends. If it is someone i know then more than likely i will just think they are trying to be amusing. But a stranger uses sarcasm i might assume they are trying to be rude (but it also depends on their tone).
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@James72 (26829)
• Australia
15 Aug 08
Yes it does depend. Sarcasm from a stranger can be really hard to work out becasue we don't know them well enough to realise if they are being serious or not. So of course we have a good chance of being offended or getting defensive. Sarcasm is far better suited to be used among those we know and who know us as well. Thanks for responding.
• United States
15 Aug 08
no you didnt! - Picture of a animated orange cat with its eyes wide and cheeks big and full of air holding its breath
My father was always real quick to his jokes growing up but unfortunately I didnt pick that up quite how I would of liked because I do admire that. But if I do not know you and you try to throw alot of spit at me being 'cute' then I do not think i would like it and probably find it annoying and share my thoughts but once I got to know you I think I could deal with it as long as your not compromising anyone elses feelings because I tend to stick up for my friends first and foremost but I know there is some people who seems like they live and breath sarcasm every bit of the day and to me thats not healthy and just plain annoying and it appears like a lot of insecurity to me and you always hear the stories about that annoying person because they didn't know when to stop, well, thats my point. If you funny in your sarcasm and make me laugh--It doesnt take much, I noticed Im usually the one laughing when others aren't--thats fun.
@James72 (26829)
• Australia
15 Aug 08
This is the key really. To truly appreciate sarcasm you can't immediately get on the defensive. A true "sarcasm afficianado" is able to think quickly on their feet. And yes, sometimes people don't know when to stop and take things a little to far. I have to admit that I too have done this on occasion! Thanks for responding.
@magojordan (3254)
• Philippines
15 Aug 08
I really think that being sarcastic only implies that you really don't know that much about a problem. If you're sarcastic about it maybe you should just focus on solutions. Also I see a lot of sarcastic people really don't do anything but get sarcastic with things and problems. I agree that a little bit of sarcasm is good but too much of it could get people hurt.
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@James72 (26829)
• Australia
15 Aug 08
Interesting..... So in a sense you are saying that people who use a lot of sarcasm do so as a defense mechanism? Hmm. Maybe in some cases you are absolutely right but I do not agree totally woith this. For some of us it is just the way we approach humour. Some tell jokes, some make faces..... Some are sarcastic! And yes, it can hurt people if not used carefully. Thanks for responding.
@valeria1 (2723)
• United States
14 Aug 08
I am sarcastic as sarcastic can be and my hubbie is worse than me. I just love this type of humor and feel sorry for those that goes uh? Did you see that before? Some people do not get it! I just have the ball. If for example my hubbie copies me in something, he loves that, to copy my faces, I just laugh and laugh and do the same to him in a cartoon way so we have really so much fun. I love sense of humor more sarcastic, better!
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@James72 (26829)
• Australia
15 Aug 08
By the sounds of it you and your husband must have some AMAZING confrontations! Thankfully you both also appear to take it from each other well which is even better! I too enjoy this type of humour. Thanks for responding.
• United States
14 Aug 08
People should say what they mean as oppose of using sarcasm to answer questions or to express on how the feel because a joker can go by what they say instead of what they mean.
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@James72 (26829)
• Australia
14 Aug 08
This is an interesting perspective if I understand you correctly..... I do however disagree with you in saying that for some people this IS their way of joking around with others. Sarcasm is just a little harsher is all! Thanks for responding.
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@Bluepatch (2480)
• Trinidad And Tobago
14 Aug 08
Sarcasm is a higher form of humour in which a relevant situation is referred to in an abstract manner. Some people are highly offended by this because they see it as a kind of contemptous response to their concerns. It should be taken as humour unless its intended to insult. Sarcastic insults, to be honest, are really pointed most of the time, if you know what I mean.
@James72 (26829)
• Australia
14 Aug 08
Nice definition! An "abstract manner" is definitely a good way to describe it! Yes sarcastic words can certainly contain a sting so I do know what you mean! Thanks for responding.
@TessWhite (3147)
• United States
14 Aug 08
I'm well known in my group of friends and family for my sarcasm. Its an art form that has taken me years to develope. LOL However, sometimes when I quickly respond to something with some form of sarcasm I realize some may not realize I am not intending to offend. I personally enjoy a witty conversation with lots of humor and sarcasm thrown in. Its a shame not everyone can understand those of us with this warped skill.
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@James72 (26829)
• Australia
14 Aug 08
"Sarcasm as an art form!" Now I like the sounds of that! I enjoy a witty conversation too. It's just hard to find one these days without someone getting upset! Thanks for responding.
• China
14 Aug 08
maybe i donnot agree with you . someone may don not like others'sarcasm for he may could not stand it .
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@James72 (26829)
• Australia
14 Aug 08
Sure! Not everyone is going to understand or appreciate sarcasm. This is why those that use it really need to be wary of the situations in which they DO use it! Thanks for responding.
• Malaysia
14 Aug 08
Hey there James72, I can take most sarcastic comments about myself just as long as it is in good intention and is funny. However, I can not handle people who do it for the fun of it and likes to degrade people. For example, I ahve a friend who keeps making fun of people who gets emotional like sometimes when people try to be serious he's like mocking them and tease them as if he is too cool to be emotionally unstable.
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@James72 (26829)
• Australia
14 Aug 08
I agree that there is a fine line between sarcasm and just being plain mean. I have seen both sides of the coin in this regard myself. Thanks for responding.
@alokn99 (5717)
• India
14 Aug 08
James, A sarcastic exchange as you say can be entertaining or witty if the other person/persons are close friends, or if you are on the same wavelength with them. I have experienced a few of these exchanges. They have been fun for sometime, but you have to know when to stop, else the one upmanship starts and then it becomes a wee bit nasty.
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@James72 (26829)
• Australia
14 Aug 08
Oh I have DEFINITELY seen things turn nasty when all of a sudden someone gets offended or is outdone by someone else's comment! You need a really thick skin to be able to go the distance with exchanges like these. Thanks for responding.
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@mysdianait (65070)
• Italy
14 Aug 08
I agree that sarcasm ccan be fun BUT it is so often misunderstood in the written form and that can backfire with terrible consequences. Sarcasm between two people speaking in the same native language is great fun but it takes a while to get to know the people well enough to be able to experiment it and befoe it can take off - once that happens WOW!
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• United States
14 Aug 08
I'm trying to think of a sarcastic retort to this post, but am coming up dry. Oh, well.... maybe next time. Sarcasm can be fun, I agree.
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@James72 (26829)
• Australia
14 Aug 08
I wish you DID come up with something! I don't think I have ever had the opportunity to have a sarcastic back and forth exchange on here yet? I know I have made the odd sarcastic comment to others on here before but it always seems to stop there! Thanks for responding.
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