physical appereance or character?

relationship - men and women holding hands
@skenthal (1022)
Turkey
August 15, 2008 1:14pm CST
i was wondering nowadays relationships really end faster when its compared to old times, i think thats because of people attracted by male/female physical appereance more, well for me of course physical appereance is important but if i dont like her characteristics at all there no chance for us to be together,so for me i think both physical appereance and character is important but character is more important however even our characteristics matchs up i would like a girl who looks good ... what do you think about this issue? physical appereance or characteristics are more important? or both things are important when you are getting in a relationship with someone?
4 people like this
20 responses
15 Aug 08
I think its just natural that when you meet someone you generally know if you are attracted to them physically but I think the problem is when people start their relationships off sexually not really knowing the other person. Once those people finally find out who that person is then they notice they dont look as good as they did before. I think personality is most important and if but I would be a hypocrite if I didnt say that I look at the physical apperance first. I think my huband is the perfect package but to someone else he may not be so it depends on each individual person. I just dont think a relationship can last on just looks alone it would get extremely boring after a while.
1 person likes this
@bamakelly (5193)
• United States
15 Aug 08
I would like to think that a person's physical traits aren't as important as the character traits. It is nice to look at a person with beauty. But it should really only matter what the person is like on the inside. Sometimes looks can be deceiving. You could meet a beautiful woman or handsome man and you might not like their personality. You could have a chance of a lifetime of happiness with someone if you have something in common or they have a sense of humor and if they just make you happy. It is on the inside that counts.
@hiddenwing (3721)
• China
16 Aug 08
Your discussion is always hot. This is incredible. Anyway, people with a good character look much more beautiful than they are supposed to be, I guess! In a same way, bad people look much more ugly than their original appearance. According to ur discussions, u are a good person. Thus, u look much more handsome now than the time I haven't read ur disscussions. Never mind!
16 Aug 08
for me I will choose character because this is important for the relationship, to build a strong relationship.
• Philippines
17 Aug 08
Character matters. That's all
@dotesign (36)
• Philippines
16 Aug 08
nowadays relationships really end faster not because of their physical appearance it is because of their character... which means they just like each other because of what they see physically without seeing whats inside their heart. still im looking for someone who has a good character rather choosing a good looking girl but have a bad personality or character....for me it's just a bonus having a beautifulgirl with good character.... but if you have love one''s be thankful and accept him/her for what she/he is.. be proud and show how you really love and respect her/him...
• United States
16 Aug 08
I think both play a vital role. While most of us would like to think that we don't revolve ourselves around looks...that ultimately is how we choose to approach someone. If we choose to start a relationship with someone we should be picking someone for the right reasons. I believe that one can not base it off of looks or personality alone. As for relationships ending faster than before I think it is for many reasons. For one thing we tend to rush into things. We know that we have more choices so we like to weigh our options. So while we like the feeling of being in a relationship, the minute we don't like something about someone we are so quick to walk because whether it's braking up or divorce...it is no longer frowned upon in society. Back in the day you made things work for the sake of the family and because it just wasn't right. If you don't match up with someone you shouldn't stay with that person. That is no way to live your life. I think that both looks and personality have to play a role. Soemone could be attractive but you don't have a thing in common with them and tend to have no meaningful conversation...that's just boring.
@YourGod (36)
• United States
16 Aug 08
I think character is more important.. Well I am pretty sure of it.. Although physical appearence is also important..
• United States
16 Aug 08
I'm always suspicious of someone who is really beautiful, male or female. When someone is very beautiful, everyone wants them, all the time. So it's harder for that individual to fight off the temptation of having multiple relationships. They are being besieged constantly by others who want "own" their physical beauty. I've always believed that beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. An "ugly" person can be beautiful in the eyes of their beloved. When love is blooming within the heart, then beauty is also there. Also, I think an "attractive" person is different than a "beautiful" person. It depends on the soul, what's really going on in the heart of that person. A beautiful soul makes anyone beautiful. A bitter and angry soul makes even the most physicall beautiful person, ugly. Also, when someone is really beautiful, it's very difficult for them when they get older, as it's hard to let go of that beauty they possessed when they were young. That's why plastic surgeons are so busy. That brings me back to the soul..the soul is eternally young. So if we understand this, no matter how old our bodies get, we will always appear "young."
@towongfoo27 (2989)
• United States
16 Aug 08
The answer to whether physical appearance or character is important in a relationship depends on the parties involved. Also ask yoursefl whether you want Mrs. Right Now or Mrs. Tomorrow. What is more important to you? Maybe as a person ages, physcial attractiveness kind of goes out the door anyways, so I would think for a long lasting relationship, character is more important. Time can do funny things to a person and thier "appearance." Who knows, in 10 years you might have wrinkles or go bald? Good luck finding a hot chick then..
• Singapore
16 Aug 08
Hello Skenthal, For me, physical appearance is what I look for in the short-term, but in the long term, I will definitely look into the character and attitude of my partner. No choice, this is the reality. How can anyone be first attracted to anyone before first accepting the appearance? Even we human subconsciously make the mistake of proritizing appearance to function. Thing about it, when you shop for something in the mall, will you pick up a something which has a nice packaging or something that is ugly in appearance?
@lingli_78 (12836)
• Australia
16 Aug 08
i go for character definitely... there is no use having a good looking partner if the character is bad... i would prefer to have an ordinary looking partner but he has a good heart and treat me well... take care and have a nice day...
@cecelgay (563)
• Philippines
16 Aug 08
Hi skenthal, for me both are important (Im just being true) but character will decide whether i'll stay or not, of course everybody wants thier partner to be a good looking one but if his character is'nt good why should i waste time to be with in that person, It just give me headache and too much frustration and depression.
• Philippines
16 Aug 08
of course, physical appearance has its importance. most people want to know persons who LOOK interesting. but that's it. what goes after that is the personality. as of myself, i really value the character more. some of my friends ask me why i like this person when he doesn't even look good. well, i get attracted to those whose character i find interesting
• Philippines
16 Aug 08
yeah relationships right now are worse! its because many are just inlove of the physical appearance, and its what we called LUst or infatuation, if this is the thing then it really wont last long, for what is really important is the beauty inside of the person and not just the appearance of a person
• Philippines
16 Aug 08
i think i would go for character...character is what builds a strong relationship..
@magna86 (1787)
• India
16 Aug 08
i completly agree!! both physical appearence and character is very much important!! i would categorise it as 40%physical and 60% character!!.. the character ofa person is very much important.. inorder to be together!!
@ronreyes (4724)
• Philippines
16 Aug 08
I go with both. Physical appearance plays a big part of attracting someone, since that's the first thing they will notice when they see you. My point is that even though you're not really good-looking, but when you dress neat and be presentable, then I think people will find you interesting.
@palonghorn (5483)
• United States
16 Aug 08
I would have to say that character is more important than good looks. I mean if he is not honest, hard-working, good moral character, respectful, and only has his good looks to stand on......count me out. My s/o is all those things and has a fantastic sense of humor, is he the world's most handsome man, probably not, but he is good looking to me, and my girlfriends have all asked if he has a brother lol. One of his favorite sayings 'I might not be much to look at, but I'm fun to watch' I always tell him to stop it when he says that lol He isn't hard on the eyes.
@skaterx (530)
• Finland
15 Aug 08
I think the reason alot of relationships break apart nowadays might be because in the 'old days' people considered divorce kind of bad, i mean say a century ago, it probably was not very common to break apart from your husband or wife whether you still loved them or not. Nowadays, in for example, some Western societies, its pretty much accepted that you can divorce your partner for whatever type of reason. People don't try to stick as much together anymore. They keep trying to find the perfect person for them, so they pick apart every flaw that their partner has. So people often don't stay with one partner for their whole life now.
@P3T3R_P (14)
• Indonesia
15 Aug 08
for me, both things are important because physical is i see first, that's natural for human being, eyes play for first time. After that characteristics play how our relationship will go. For me, if i want long relationship, i must learn much about her so i can know what i must prepare in the future.