Relationships
By shylesson
@shylesson (360)
United States
November 5, 2006 4:06pm CST
In mine, my gf does not want to talk to me when she has something going on and needs to talk to someone. She doesn't like talking to me about money issues or stressors in her life. She does not make me an equal partner and gets mad and upset when I get mad and upset for her not letting me in. How can I help her when she doesn't let me? Money concerns me too; I can't be just handing over hundreds of dollars each month and not be saving for the car we are supposed to be saving for at the same time. She keeps saying she will save with me, but she doesn't and I'm always needing to bail her out each month with a few hundred or so dollars. It's not productive at all. And it's not just bills-- she goes online and plays the damn casinos or goes to the slots in the nearby city and just does all this knowing i will bail her out cause it deals with me too (I live with her so rent needs to be paid and food does need to be stocked). Her daughter contributes MINIMAL for having 2 kids with her. Her daughter takes up 75% of the house and pays 40% the bills and yet she won't do crap to get ahead. I don't know how to have a relationship that is one-sided. :\
2 people like this
3 responses
@sbeauty (5865)
• United States
5 Nov 06
I would say that this young lady is trying to royally screw you. This is not a relationship. It's more like daddy and his spoiled little girl. I would advise you to get rid of this gal pronto and find one who is more into the give and take that makes a secure, long-lasting relationship.
1 person likes this
@shylesson (360)
• United States
5 Nov 06
hard thing to do when we've been together for 2 years now. Maybe eventually I will; my defenses have been drained and as of late I almost did. I'm just more pulled by old ideals of love conquering all I imagine. :\
@shylesson (360)
• United States
5 Nov 06
yeh tried that-- i get the whole 'you are trying to break up my family' routine. I can't win. Then I thought about moving out myself, but then I would still worry about her and try to help her with the added bills/stress of my own payments so that would kind of be counter-productive, lol.
@magikrose (5429)
• United States
5 Nov 06
What you need to do is to just stop bailing her out. I realise it is not easy to stop an old habbit but you have other obligations that are more important than her habbits. A car is way more important than playing the slots online. When she comes to you for money you need to simply say Icant keep bailing you out and i am not going to do it anymore. I need a car, rent needs to be paid. Those things are much more important.
1 person likes this
