do you think your husband can be ur best friend??

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India
September 9, 2008 3:54am CST
i have heard many ladies saying that they hide about their friends who are boys from their husbands...they fear that their husbands cant digest their BOY=friends......watever pure n good their relations may be...but still they fear...if their husbands doubt them? also many things they keep just among friends.... wat u think...u share everythng with ur husband...even abt ur boyfriend u had b4 marriage? and u think u have to disclose each n everythng to ur hubby????tell me wat u feel?
9 people like this
47 responses
• Croatia (Hrvatska)
9 Sep 08
I'm married for 6y and in my marriage there is no secrets.If my husband knows me then he will be ok if I have man-friends.And there is one thing that is very important u and ur partner have to be best friends in the first place.
1 person likes this
• United States
10 Sep 08
I couldn't have said it better. I trust him completely so he is allowed female friends, and he trusts me so I am allowed male friends. We've always been open and honest with eachother. I also believe a good marriage will happen if you are friends before marriage. Just thought I'd share my thoughts. Thank you! :)
• India
11 Sep 08
i have always thought tha my husband is my best best best of friends and for that reason i had never maintained any friends otehr than him till date ever since i was 13 year old. and i have discussed every minute to trivial to very vital and quintessential matters with him. only to realise and understand that he is best friend for someone and not for me. regretting now wouldn't help.
• India
11 Sep 08
take things lite...everything will be all right.Think positive.What happened in ur life was good....because now you know who to believe and not....
@kavinsh (78)
• India
11 Sep 08
hi sandhyababu as i belong to india. still we people are living in such situations where we are talking about women rights.but not implementing. still we don't want girl child. men can talk about anything but women can't. i feel if u want to lead happy married life,then forget ur b4 marriage life and don't share ur secrets with ur husband. how much he is good friend of yours. if at the time he is not reacting then later on he will definately react may be in form of comment,joking whatever. take care
• India
11 Sep 08
thanks a lot for ur response... there are many unfortunate people like u are telling. but am fortunate enough to get a husband who is best than any best friends.To whom i tell everything, be it my past, or present... He is matured enough to take everything in the right spirit. i thank god...
@jammyt (2822)
• Philippines
9 Sep 08
Yes,I agree with this. My husband has been my bestfriend even before we had a relationship. This is why I know all about his past relationships and all that. He also know who my guy friends are, In fact, when he is not around,he knows who to call to keep an eye on me.
• India
9 Sep 08
thank u for your response.... my husband is my best frnd to whom i share evrthng...i pray for u..may your life remain happy..happy myloting
@SViswan (12071)
• India
29 Nov 09
Though technically I do believe that your husband can be your best friend and you need not hide things from him, I know it's not true in all relationships and sometimes it is not even practical to disclose some things to your husband. People are human and not all husbands are understanding and trusting. Why break up a wonderful relationship just to unburden past experiences which are better left alone? This isn't true for everyone. I know couples who are open to each other about everything and have a really good relationship...I also know couples who have broken up because one has been too trusting of the other.
• United States
24 Sep 08
Yes, my husband is my best friend. I feel like I can tell him everything. I can even talk about past relationships with him and he doesn't feel threatened by it. He knows that he's got me and I'm not going anywhere. I have some guy friends and he doesn't care cause he knows they are just my friends and nothing more. My husband and I trust each other so we don't have to hide anything.
@onesiobhan (1330)
• Canada
15 Sep 08
My husband is my best friend. We were friends long before we became a couple. We do still have other friends of course. Both of us have friends who are both male and female. But he's number one to me.
@Ohara_1983 (4120)
• Kuwait
12 Sep 08
I can say yes, my hubby can be my best friend & friend, im not hiding anyhting to my huibby evenlot of my co-workers my BOY friends but for him h knows that he still the best for me.
• Nepal
11 Sep 08
Husband could be a good companion. It helps to make the lover for the ever lasting. The partnership and coperation make man to be loved and beloved so both should be help ful towards eachother.
• United States
10 Sep 08
Yes. But you have to remember you cannot tell your close friends everything. Especially, if you want to keep their friendship. If you talk to other male friends, its best not to mention the friendship, unless its necessary. It creates insecurity in your husband. But if you and your husband are very close and you instill in him good principles about you. He will not feel threatened by another male friend. Its best not to have another close male relationship that would compete with your husbands relationship with you.
• Pakistan
10 Sep 08
hm... i think husband can be your close friend... very close indeed... you can share everything with him... but STOP..... NOT everythingg... you should not tell him about your previous affairs.. or break ups... coz they can use this as your negative point... and dude, boy= friends are a big NO.... even if they do not show, the husbands do not like it... so beware.... do not share such things which make them think of you as a wrong person.. and men do not think like women... remember MEN ARE FROM MARS AND WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS.... he might have a girl= friend, and he might want you to accept her... but if it is other way around... Wofff you are spoiling the realtion then...
@savypat (20245)
• United States
10 Sep 08
My husband is my best friend. I couldn't live with him if he wasn't. I really need that closeness.
@Pose123 (21665)
• Canada
10 Sep 08
Hi sandhyababu, Of course husbands and wives can be best friends, although most feel the need for a best friend of the same gender. Blessings.
• United States
10 Sep 08
Everything has to be shared between a husband and a wife. For starters if you lie (or hide something) you have to remember that and sooner or later you will slip up. But even more than that, your husband is your best friend. He is the one person you can always count on being on your side. He is the one person you should want to share things with. The only reason a woman would want to hide other friends from her husband is if there is something fishy going on.
@Djbrat (333)
• United States
10 Sep 08
I want to be honest and open with my husband, but jealousy gets in the way of that. It seems I need to try harder to be open with him, as well as him being open with me.
@mlh8087 (370)
• United States
10 Sep 08
My husband knows just about everything there is to know about me. He has stood me when I was down (depression), thru my recovery, and thru all the rest that comes with marriage. Our belief is this, "It's okay to look but don't try them on!" He knows who my guy friends have been, he knows who my girlfriends are. Heaven knows, he really tries to keep up with the shows I watch on TV but he works days and I work nights so he never knows what I'm recording and watching. The key words there are "he tries". Yes, husbands and wives should share as much as they can, afterall once they were married they "became one".
@mflower2053 (3227)
• United States
10 Sep 08
I share everything with my husband. The good the bad and the ugly lol. We have been together for 13 years and married for 8. I could always go to him for everything. Yes we get into it but making up is fun and no we don't have a perfect relationship but who does. I believe we are soul mates and I trust him enough to share everything with him. I even tell him how much I don't like his mother. lol
@quinnkl (1667)
• United States
10 Sep 08
I have two very close friends who are best friends with their husbands. One has know him since grade school, and they still do everything together and enjoy each other's company, and talk like best friends do. The other friend met her husband when they were both in their 30s and have this same type of relationship. How wonderful when couples find that. I think it is very rare indeed to have this type of relationship - a true best friend type of friendship - between spouses, but it gives me hope to know and see that is can and does happen for some.
@enavnai13 (509)
• Philippines
10 Sep 08
i am a single person and i don't know the feeling of getting married yet. however, i personally believe that honesty is the best policy... LOL! seriously, everything depends. but i prefer to tell my partner everything... i have a boyfriend right now and he knows everything about me.. even my past relationships, i told him everything about it. down to the smallest details.. sometimes i feel like my privacy is gone.. but i've never been happier.. it made me feel very comfortable being with him. so i think it's ok, i mean it's better if you share it to your partner just as long as you know he won't feel bad about it. i believe that open communication is essential for a relationship to survive.. the point is, why keep it a secret when you got nothing to hide?...
@leenie50 (3992)
• United States
10 Sep 08
I absolutely think that my husband can be my best friend. For that matter he is. My other best friend is a woman named Paula who lives 3000 miles away. I believe we can have more than one best friend. Their is no one like my best girlfriend and no one like my best boy friend(husband). If I had a male best friend before I met my husband, then he absolutely would know it. And yes I do disclose everything, even when I know an argument might erupt. I truly believe in honesty at all cost. If we can't be honest with our own spouses then we are living in a rocky and volatile relationship. It also leaves too much room for deceit and unfaithfulness. If we can't be trusted then how can we expect our spouses to be trust worthy? leenie