Do you ever really worry about any of your kids?

@gemini_rose (16192)
September 23, 2008 6:55am CST
When I say worry, I mean any kind of worry about them in regards to their attitude or the way they are in themselves? Well I do, and it is something that has been building up for a while and it concerns my second son who is 8. At first it started off that he would keep saying he wanted to die, and he would always say that he was going to kill himself, it used to really upset me. I would talk to him about what he was saying and explain as best as I could what death was. Now, he does not say he wants to kill himself but rather that he cannot wait to grow up so that he can kill his family. I have spoken to him recently about this, because again I find this quite worrying and upsetting that he can say this so easily. Now I have come to the decision that if he keeps on with this I am going to get in touch with my health visitor or the nurse at school and have a word with them about this. Is this the right thing to do, do you think? How would you feel and what would you do if this was your son?
1 person likes this
13 responses
@Ithink (10618)
• United States
24 Sep 08
Im sorry to hear this although I kinda know what you are going thru. Our one daughter is like this .. long story but she kept acting out from the age of about 13 on. Then she started to sneak out and no matter what we did just didnt seem to matter. Took her to a therapist and things too. In the end she ended up getting pregnant at 15 and then kept getting in trouble with the law. I would stay up trying to keep an eye on her to finally fall asleep from exhaustion and then she would sneak out. Anyways we know have her daughter, got guardianship and she is in a girls home. So far she hasnt seemed to want to change but Im still hoping. She has been diagnoised with Bi-polar, Personality disorder and a few other things. I can only say know that you arent the cause. I went thru the guilt that I was, but out of 7 she is the only one like this. It is really hard when this happens as you dont really know what to do. All we can do is to do our best and keep everyone else as safe as we can. Hopefully getting some help and testing will help.
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@gemini_rose (16192)
24 Sep 08
Wow, 7 kids! You deserve a medal. I was so sad to read your story, it must be so hard for you. I hope it all works out for you all.
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@Ithink (10618)
• United States
25 Sep 08
Thank you, I still hope things turn around and she can accept the help that she needs. I can tell you that 7 wasnt that hard, it is running after a little one now that gets ya .. lol Yeah 8 is a nice rounded number thou. lol
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@anawar (2406)
• United States
24 Sep 08
gemini - hi. You are the only one who knows what is right for your son. You live with him and have watched him develop. It sounds like you have used all the motherly skills you can think of. Maybe it's time to call in the pros. Let them figure it out. Even if it comes to nothing, you will have the peace of mind knowing you explored every avenue. My son is 24 now, but if he spoke as your son does, I would take my son to a professional. I don't know what your health insurance covers, but I would start with my regular doctor and see if they think a referral is necessary. One time I heard a four year old tell his parents he wishes he was never born. How sad. I often wonder if his parents took him to a doctor and I can't ever forget the incident. I hope they took that little boy for help. travel lightly anawar
1 person likes this
• United States
24 Sep 08
I don't have kids...lol........i mean parents should worry about their kids and their and try to make them persuade to right direction.......for your situation you should to doctor or therapist ......why does he talk like that....My bro is 6 yrs ... i will beat the crap out of him if he say anything like that lol....Maybe your son is being influence badly by someone or in school.....you should take it seriously ask him question why he think like and who say to him stuff....try to talk him out of it....take control of the situation ..and show him who's the bad Boss..BE hard on him....and see if the things change...like take always his favorite things for while ground him....
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@weiwei88 (119)
• Singapore
24 Sep 08
i do not have kids but i was once a kid. Probably there must be attention given to them. If you realyl trust your kids, do let them do things that they like. Sometimes, they have their rebellious stage to go through. it is just a phrase. I guess knowing who your kids hangs out with is really important as it will reflect on the future who they turn out to be
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@cecelgay (563)
• Philippines
24 Sep 08
Sorry to hear that, at his erly age he says that thing? kids at their young age is a great imitator, what they hear or see they may imitate it, did you remember watching some movies or TV about killings? he maybe get that thought on that, at the early stage of develpment of children their brain is just like a sponge, they absorb everything that they see or hear, that's why there are some parents who prohibits their kids watching TV or any violent movies for them not to have any idea about it, I have 2 sons, my oldest son imitates everything that we've said, those words he want to utter it that's why we dont want him to see any fights or hear any badwords, it will be a big upset to us hearing our kids saying badwords, though they dont have any idea how bad what they are saying still it will upset us. why not try to ask any professionals for that about his it, for sure they can help you about it, they can help you how to reset his mind from that violence, As a parents we dont want our kids to do anything bad ar anything bad happend to them, at their early age we are in-charge in everything, you're son is still young and try to do something about it to erase it in his mind. Dont forget to pray about it, ask God's assistance and He will never fail you, just do your part and he will do His About your question if i really worried about my kids, yes i do,i am worried in all aspect, their attitude when they grow up, their health and their future, as a parent this is a natural thing on us.
@glords (2614)
• United States
24 Sep 08
I think your son is either watching too much TV or spending time with some bad influences. Where does an 8 year old come up with that sort of a thing. I would worry too, though I bet its probably a phase.
@tessah (6621)
• United States
23 Sep 08
you know quite well the worries and troubles ive had with my oldest. most recently left unmentioned was a call i had to place to the police dept when i found some emails shed written threatoning to kill people. so i have been in yer position.. and its a terrible place to be and it feels just awful. regardless of how old yer son is.. id seek some help now rather than waiting. if there is a problem, the sooner you get him some assistance, the better itll be for him and everyone else in your family. better safe than sorry yeah? youve got even younger ones to protect as well, and heavens forbid, if the worse did happen.. and youve known there was a potential problem.. youd never be able to live with yerself. *huggs tight* get in touch with someone who specializes with children, and get the ball rolling.
@gemini_rose (16192)
23 Sep 08
Yes I do know the troubles you have had, I have been sitting on this awhile, I guess with him only being 8 I thought it might be nothing to worry about. Truth is I am worried and it upsets me too. You are right I need to do something, thank you.
@gemini_rose (16192)
23 Sep 08
Thank you xx
• United States
23 Sep 08
If this were my son, I wouldn't hesitate to take him to some sort of psychologist to find out what is the matter with him. I hate to say this, but you have to remember that kids can be psychopaths as well. He's already eight, does he know where the knives are? This is a problem that shouldn't wait until he's made an attempt to do something. I believe in my heart of hearts that someone must have done something to the child to make him feel that way, but I would get to the bottom of it and quick!!!
@gemini_rose (16192)
24 Sep 08
Thanx, I know, I see the news. Its hard to know what to do for the best sometimes.
@bunnybon7 (43533)
• Holiday, Florida
23 Sep 08
its a good idea to get some kind of therapy. i dont think he truely means it because if hes capable of that he would not still be opening up to you. it is a cry for help and needs to be looked into how to help. my youngest used to say those things. it was assumed by the therapist that it was due to him being a daddys boy and i had left his dad due to abuse. i tried not to let him know all that but the older kids (a different dad) said things about his dad was crazy, etc. then it didnt help that his dad had another child, grown and married(not mine) that had killed himself! so, it had a toll on my son. he is 28 yrs now and hasnt done any of that, but he still has struggles with life.
@gemini_rose (16192)
24 Sep 08
No, I do not think he means it either, I think he knows that it upsets me but I do not think he realises how serious I am taking it. I talked to him yesterday and told him that I was considering seeing the school nurse and he was really upset, he could not understand why. I explained to him and he said he was sorry for upsetting me.
@checapricorn (16065)
• United States
23 Sep 08
[i]Hi gemini, I wonder what made him feel and say that way? was he hurt by anyone verbally or what? anyway that will alarm me also..I might be spending more time with him and trace what he feels deep inside and try to help him feel better and good, help him understand things after knowing the reasons! [/i]
@gemini_rose (16192)
24 Sep 08
I think I know, but he is very sensitive, they are all like me in that way. I think he does need me more, it is just finding a way of spending me and him time as his brother hates to be left out.
@katsmeow1213 (28910)
• United States
23 Sep 08
I think I would have seeked councelling the first time he said he wanted to kill himself. I don't think that's normal for such a young child. Those thoughts don't normally enter a person's head until the teenage years, and even then it's scary. I would definitly see councelling, and quick.
@gemini_rose (16192)
23 Sep 08
Yes that is my thoughts thanx.
• United States
1 Oct 08
I believe it would be best for you to contect them exspecial if this has be going on for a while. I'd really be worried where learned about this from. What could be making him say that stuff. If you get him therapist or something that can talk to him about what going on with him and maybe understand what his feeling to why his saying it. Best of luck with it. Happy Mylotting!!!!
• United States
23 Sep 08
I suggest that you get your son into counselling ASAP. He obviously needs it. No child at that age should be having those kinds of thoughts