Late Birthdays affect school?

United States
September 25, 2008 10:01am CST
Do you feel that a child should be held back from starting school just because their birthday falls late in the year? My BF's daughter is going to be 4 this October and we were wanting to put her in preschool. We were denied this year because she is not 4 yet. So she wouldn't be able to start until next year. That means she wouldn't be able to start kindergarten until she was 6. I believe that its unfair to her to be behind her age children in school.
4 people like this
23 responses
@grammasnook (1875)
• United States
25 Sep 08
I am not sure where you live but up here in Massachusetts children are able to start pre-school as young as 2.9 months as long as they are potty trained. Also up here in Mass as long as by the end of the year the child is of age they may attent the grade they are in. Lots of states prefer for a child to be the older 4 verses the younger 4 for maturity reasons. I think this is insane. I believe that if you take a child that is 3 and put them with older children they tend to follow the leader and increase thier ability to learn quickly. My 8 year old is very very mature and the reason for this is he is the baby of 5, my oldest being 25 and the fourth child being 17. It should not have to do with age but with the ability that the child has, lots of children at young ages are very advanced they should have a test for them.
1 person likes this
@mommyboo (13191)
• United States
27 Sep 08
I agree too! I think that parents know their children, and if you know your child is ready for school and they are still four, you probably know what you're doing. having a way to evaluate readiness would be a wonderful tool - it could indicate children who are four that are fine starting kindergarten, yet also identify children who are four that should wait until they are five.
@GemmaR (8520)
25 Sep 08
I admit that this might not seem fair to you, but at the same time you have to understand that they have to have a cut-off point somewhere. My birthday is in early september, to the point that if I had been born just a couple of days earlier I would be in the year above at school. I was happy about this though, as it gave me a whole extra year at home before school, and being the oldest in the class means that I have my birthday first and it's often still in the summer holidays, which is good. Now that I am going to university next year, I know that I will never be in school for my birthday again, as university's in this country only start back around September 21st.
1 person likes this
@mommyboo (13191)
• United States
27 Sep 08
My birthday falls around the beginning (traditionally) of the school year, but back when I was still in school we did not go back till after Labor Day. Here in California my kids start at the beginning of August because they get out at the end of May. I like having them get out early because it is so hot here, and then you have all of June and July for a break.
@fasttalker (2796)
• United States
25 Sep 08
When my youngest son started kindergarten (birthday 9-18) he was 6. He is a senior this year and has done very well. He has always been the oldest one in his class which has conributed to making him a leader type person. The biggest down side I see to it is that if you have a child that is having problems or maybe some rebellion going on they turn 18 before they graduate. And as we all know they think that 18 mark is a worldwide event! LOL So I guess that could cause a problem of quitting school or something. But if it helps any it has worked out well for mine!
• United States
25 Sep 08
I'm sure it will work out fine for her too. my biggest fear is, what if something happens down the line and she has to be held back. That would make her 19 graduating instead of the normal 17 or 18.
@foxyfire33 (10007)
• United States
25 Sep 08
There's actually a greater chance of "trouble down the road" if you start a child too early rather than late. Maturity has a big impact on sucess in school. A child younger and less mature than classmates will be more likely to be held back at least once. S/o's oldest son has a late June birthday and started when he was just 5. (the cut off date here is Septembr 1st). He repeated 4th grade which would have had him graduating right before his 19th birthday but then struggled in high school. Had he stayed in school he wouldn't have graduated until right before his 21st birthday. Had he been held back a year and not started until he was 6 I think his maturity would have caught up with him more easily and he would still be in school and looking forward to his graduation at the end of this year before his 19th.
@dropofrain (1168)
• India
26 Sep 08
I think what ever you have said is absolutely correct. Being late in the birth should not lead to problems in the admissions. It is the brain which has to work and why do they consider the birth date for the same. I think the schools should have different criteria for judging the children for admissions.
• United States
26 Sep 08
I so agree with you, just wish they would have some kind of entrance test like they do for some private schools and college. Thanks for the response.
• China
26 Sep 08
this happened in the past years in china. i was denied to attend teh preschool before 6years old, but now, age is never a prolem. if parent agreed to pay month, his child can go to scool at any age. you are from USA, i feel surprised at the news.
• United States
26 Sep 08
Ya, you would think things would be a little different. Thanks for the response.
@heaven11 (1159)
• United States
26 Sep 08
Well here in Tn you can start pre k at 3 but still at that you would still have an issue if your birthdate was after the cut off they still wouldnt allow them to start kenedrgarten the reason they say is because they have a prek program used to be that if you had went to pre k then you had a chance of going to kendergarten when you were 4 but they no longer allow that and i dont think its fair because in my opioin a 4 and 5 year old are on the same learning level heck there are some 4 year olds that are on the same level with 6$7 year olds
• United States
26 Sep 08
I live in TN too. I just don't understand why they put an age limit on preK programs. Some daycares do offer it, but it's not by teachers. Thanks for the response.
@sudalunts (5526)
• United States
25 Sep 08
Maybe, you should check out the age and date for kindergarten admission. My son's birthday is in Dec, and he was able to start kindergarten at age four, because he would have turned five in december. He was actually the youngest child in his class, all the other students were five already. Maybe that is just the prerequisite for pre school in your area and not for kindergarten.
• United States
25 Sep 08
We did check and the cut off for kindergarten is the first week of September. Our elementary schools here offer preschool/headstart programs that get kids ready for kindergarden. We can put her in a headstart program that will be very costly.
• United States
25 Sep 08
My daughter missed the birthday limit by 3 days (this was many years ago) and they refused to make any exceptions. I understand them wanting everyone to be on the same learning level and ability but I think the only way they can do that is by at least giving these children a chance and if it shows that they are not able to learn on the same level then maybe make them wait til the following years. At least give them a chance though.
• United States
25 Sep 08
That is what i asked them. I wanted her to take a test or something to show that she was able. We have been working with her for the past year now, she can count to 100 can read small words so i know she would do alright with her age group.
@belk89 (1103)
• Philippines
2 Oct 08
It is the policy of the school that needs to be followed unfortunately. I think she is already at the right age to go to school since she will turn 4 soon. I think the teacher could take it into consideration. But some schools are strict when it comes to the admission of children. They believe that children that are not yet at the right age to go to school will not pay attention to any activities since they are still too young to do those stuff. But if a child is going to turn 4 soon should be accepted.
@ms1323 (259)
• United States
2 Oct 08
There are a couple issues to talk about in this: First, does she have to go to preschool? Here in CA it is not required, she sounds like she would do well going directly to kindergarten, which would not put her behind a year by going to preschool. My 8 yr old could do those things as well, he went straight to kindergarten and has always been in the "smart" groups in his classes (3rd grade now.) Second, if she doesn't have to go to preschool, is she MATURE enough to go directly to kindergarten. Some kids can be exceptionally smart, but lack the social skills needed in order to make their school experience fun. My nephew was 1 day past the limit, my sis-in-law lied (in the early 90's it wasn't required to show birth certificate) and sent him to school anyway - he hated school, didn't get along with anyone in elementary school, was disruptive to the other students and in the end, BARELY graduated from high school. I believe it was a direct result of him not being ready, both mentally and emotionally. He spent 13 years in school and hated every single one of them. If he hadn't been forced to go before he was ready, I believe he would have been a much more positive experience for him. I think it should be a per-child basis. And hopefully, every parent knows if their child is ready or not. My son could have easily gone a year early, he missed the date by a couple of months. I seriously considered trying to get him in early but decided against it. As a result, he is always at the top of the curve and enjoys the confidence that comes with that. He LOVES school. Good luck!
• Canada
27 Sep 08
The reason for this is because there has to be a cut off point somewhere and no matter what month they have this is going to affect some child out there somewhere because of how a birthday lands . She will still be of an age group of her peers when she starts as there will be other children that were held back because of when there birthday fell and you can look at it as this is another year that you can spend with the child before she starts the whole school . I was happy when my son was held back because of his birthday because it meant another full year that I would be able to spend with him . There really would be no way to make everyone happy because if they allowed your boyfriends daughter to go and pushed the date back to accomodate her then someone else would be upset because the date was pushed and there child should be allowed to go because they were so close to that date and it would end up that one years old would going to school . Do you understand what I am trying to say ? I have a hard time trying to explain what I mean . Just try to look at this as a positive thing and that it is another full year to bond with the child and she really will not be that far behind her peers because like I said there will be other children with late birthdays as well and the other children will only be a little younger and because she is older she will probably pick up on things quicker :)
@donburi (316)
• Philippines
26 Sep 08
I also think that's unfair. I think what they should do is not look at the age but the year of his/her birthday. Because it would really be unfair if a child would be going to school a year late just because his/her birthday falls late on the year. Also even getting an early start at school is not also bad as long as the child can cope up.
@Anitamo (50)
• Bahamas
26 Sep 08
I am not a parent butI born the 15 October I was allow to be in Kindergarten because my mom knew the teacher so they allowed me in but to go to primary school I wasnt allow to start so I was the oldest in Kindergarten which really affect a child because all your friends are leaving and wondering why? not you. It so unfair. It was'nt my choice when I was born and I think children who in this situation should be allowed in school.
@lishiwei (1551)
• China
26 Sep 08
Oh,it's really a pity.But you shouldn't think too much of it.Maybe is good for her.I think the children shouldn't go to school too early!
• United States
26 Sep 08
Ya it was true.Late birthdays will definetly affect children joinig in school.... My brothers is my best example.According to indian rules schools begin in june and brother born in july,one month late.So he have to complete 3yrs full to join in school.This is my exerience.....
@chowdhri (37)
26 Sep 08
ya sweety, when a child born in dec in very prblm because when he completed 3½ yrs he joining to pre schooling so the people who were borning in dec, nov are to schooled late.........but people who were born in june were lucky fellows like me were studying correct classes in same years......but anyway we failes in studies what to do??????
@sam1987b (64)
25 Sep 08
there is 2 days age gap between my sister and my cousin, yet my cousin started school at 4 and sister had to wait until she was 5 it makes me so angry.
@foxyfire33 (10007)
• United States
25 Sep 08
But she won't be behind because those same standard are applied to all the other kids with late birthdays also. Anymore it's quite common to give those kids with late birthdays an extra year to mature. Kindergarten curriculums are starting to be geared more towards the almost 6 year old students.
• Canada
25 Sep 08
I guess there's always got to be a cut-off for pretty much everything. There's probably always going to be a group of people who are at a disadvantage because of the cut-offs. I really don't see it as too much of a problem, I have plenty of friends whose birthdays are in October and they seem to be perfectly fine with it.
@ANTIQUELADY (36468)
• United States
25 Sep 08
the same thing happened to my son, his birthday is in oct. i was fixing a teachers hair at the time & she said the students held back like that did alot betterthan ones who were on the borderline.that satisfied me, hope it does y'all.