A Broken Bestfriend`s Trust...

Philippines
October 9, 2008 2:19am CST
I and three of my bestfriends have been together as bestfriends for almost two decades already. And I could say that I am always the counselor in our group. But right now, I really have problem, that even I can`t really answer accurately. Two of my bestfriends got conflict with each other just last year and there have been a broken trust between the two. Even they won`t tell me what`s the score between them, I know for sure what`s going on with the two... I can sense it and I can surely feel it... action speaks louder than words. It may seem to anyone who`ll see us whenever the four of us are together that there`s really nothing wrong, but as a bestfriend I know there is... I know my bestfriends so well. But the thing is, they don`t want me to be involved, they don`t wanna share to me the problem, worst, they don`t wanna listen to me. I know, even if how better they pretend it, that there is really wrong with them. I know they have conflict before but I thought it was already solved and that they`re okay now... But how come that their issues are still there... I know for sure that it is a broken bestfriend`s trust... but I just don`t know how long are they gonna keep it...
2 responses
10 Oct 08
Best friends have disagreements like most humans. I'd wait till one of them told me what happened before doing anything. I wouldn't place myself in the position of counseling since I don't have a license to do that. Why don't you just ask outright and let them know that the friction is causing stress in the friendship and that you'd like to get the friendship back on course. Who knows, it may strengthen the relationship/friendship once it's out in the open. And if the disagreement is caused by breeching an unspoken promise of messing around with another's partner, then it must be brought to the surface and handled appropriately.
• Philippines
14 Oct 08
I guess you`re right... The thing is, I guess they don`t want to talk about their issues and they`re pretending the they`re okay. But of course I know they`re not. I really wanted to help them solve their issues since it`s suppose to be part of the past.
@Shandy14 (71)
• United States
9 Oct 08
It depends on the level, but once you break a persons trust..It can be the most difficult thing to gain back..Trust must be earned...Sometimes trust is irrevicably broken and can never be retrived. There is forgiveness, but there are some things that stay with us forever. Some things no matter how long ago it happend will stay with us 4ever! My best advice is to just let it go...If they can retrieve the trust they will, if not, then it may be best to part and move on. Friends should be having fun together and not be so stressed out when around each other. Maybe they should let their issues go when they are in your company. It seems like they are unwilling to let you help, so I would just let it go...Have fun~ Try to move beyond and think positive! Best Wishes~
• Philippines
9 Oct 08
Thanks for the response Shandy14, I am somehow enlighted. I know it, I mean I know that it is really hard to regain someone`s trust that someone had broke... What I am just really thinking is that we`re bestfriends, and so I thought it would be easy to regain the broken trust. Yes, maybe I just really need to enjoy our time together and have fun.