push them gently in the right direction, have patience and it'll all work out.
By Ravenladyj
@Ravenladyj (22902)
United States
October 9, 2008 8:47am CST
So as some of you know, my son turned 15 on Monday...something I'm pleased with yet sad about too since I wish my kids were still itty bitty....NEXT YR he'll be driving (OMG).....Anyway, the past couple of yrs at school he's not been up to par due to various things so his grades werent the greatest and he was finding himself in semi hot water at times due to his mouth and attitude...part of it was the company he was keeping...Well THIS YR, before the school yr started I gave him a one time only warning that I WILL NOT tolerate any nonsense because he's in high school now and he cant afford to be messing up etc....Well it worked....Not only did he do very mature things like apologize to teachers he's butted heads with and other students as well but he brought home a fabulous interm report AND (check this out) he is STUDENT OF THE MONTH!!! 
I was SO PROUD of him when he told me that I darn near cried LOL....
I've never been a mom to ORDER my kids to be a certain way, act a certain way think a certain way etc...I mean yes I have rules and of course respect and commmon sense comes into play etc but for the most part I've let them learn on their own, been open for communication, been very honest with them all their lives and basically let them become who they are on their own ya know....Well..as much as it'll bust my mothers bottom (long story) it's worked out amazingly...For all my kids have been through, they could have taken the bitter, violent wrong road in life but they didnt...sure there are hiccups here and there but over all...they are growing up to be DAMN FINE young adults...
Do you gently guide your children or do you have set ways that things must be done?....Whats your parenting style like and hows it working out for you? Looking back (for those who's kids are grown up and on their own) would you change things if done over again? And for those who want kids but dont have any yet, what do you think your parenting style will be like?
I was SO PROUD of him when he told me that I darn near cried LOL....
I've never been a mom to ORDER my kids to be a certain way, act a certain way think a certain way etc...I mean yes I have rules and of course respect and commmon sense comes into play etc but for the most part I've let them learn on their own, been open for communication, been very honest with them all their lives and basically let them become who they are on their own ya know....Well..as much as it'll bust my mothers bottom (long story) it's worked out amazingly...For all my kids have been through, they could have taken the bitter, violent wrong road in life but they didnt...sure there are hiccups here and there but over all...they are growing up to be DAMN FINE young adults...
Do you gently guide your children or do you have set ways that things must be done?....Whats your parenting style like and hows it working out for you? Looking back (for those who's kids are grown up and on their own) would you change things if done over again? And for those who want kids but dont have any yet, what do you think your parenting style will be like?1 person likes this
2 responses
@CanadaGal (4304)
• Canada
11 Oct 08
Many congratulations to your son, for making such GREAT choices this year!!
For the most part, my parenting style has set ways in that things must be done. I'm working on me, and learning to be more open to some alternatives, as long as the end result is the same (for example, certain chores have to be done by the boys by the end of the weekend, but I'll give them the chance to choose in what order, and when... but they also know that if it's not done by the time limit, then they lose privleges).
My system seems to be working well so far. My boys are now 7, 7, and 9, and they know what to expect from me, and what their roles are in the family. I do my best to allow them the opportunities to bring new ideas to the table... afterall, if they can come up with more efficient ways of dealing with certain things, then that's great. And I am open to compromise with them as well. Not as much as I could be, but I'm a work in progress. :)
@Pose123 (21635)
• Canada
11 Oct 08
Hi Ravenlady, You have every right to be proud as I can see that you are doing a great job. I know it can't be easy raising kids today. My three boys are men now with Children of there own. I think that our style in raising them was a lot like what you are saying here. They turned out fine and now it's their turn, I hope they will find the right way to do things today. I think if you are honest and fair as well as showing unconditional love, they will respect you and not hide a lot from you. If they call talk openly with you it's half the battle. Blessings.
