Would you rather be head over heels in love with your partner or....

@Masmasika (1921)
Philippines
October 16, 2008 8:06am CST
When one is very young, being in love is very exciting. Love paints everything she has and she lives by being in love. But when people grow older there is more to being in love. Sometimes, it is better to marry someone whom you are not so in love with but you have great respect to. Love could fade but respect wouldn't. Love could be developed when partners will get along well and understand each other. On the other hand, love could fade if partners aren't compatible. Sometimes, being head over heels in love is dangerous. Love that is developed and nurtured is better than instant love. Would you share what's in your mind? Would you rather be head over heels in love with your partner or have a great respect for him or her?
11 responses
• Hong Kong
17 Oct 08
i've great respect for my husband..and this makes me love him even more
@silverglint (2000)
• Philippines
17 Oct 08
I don't think a person can love someone without having respect for the other. Sometimes, the reason why love seems to fade is because somewhere along the way, one mate loss respect for the other,maybe due to failures and shortcomings. Feeling the rush of emotions is not exactly love so i guess its still a lot better to have respect for the person.
@tlb0822 (1410)
• United States
16 Oct 08
I think that both is needed for a great relationship. I think you need to be deeply in love with your partner and have respect for them. My fiance and I have had some issues, but we are madly in love with each other, and have respect for one another. I think that a long lasting relationship has so many layers, trust, respect, friendship, and unconditional love. Love is the greatest thing that two people can share between each other.
@carl1105 (114)
• China
17 Oct 08
that is dangerous and maybe will let you lost your direction and also make you forget yourself,life is complicated and not full of sun light all the time ,sometimes you have to keep your mind quietly ,crazy love will led to a crazy result,maybe good ,maybe bad!
@jesssp (2712)
• Canada
16 Oct 08
I think that every couple has different priorities in their relationship. But ultimately I think there needs to be a balance between love, respect, compatability and many other things for a relationship to thrive. There is absolutely nothing like being head over heels in love but sometimes once you float back down to earth, so to speak, you realize that you have nothing in common, different values etc. and that's when that initial spark can start to fade. I think that a perfect couple has great respect for one another, are super compatible w/o losing their individuality and still get that swoony feeling when they look at each other - even after 10, 20, 30+ years!
@donn_juan (325)
• Philippines
17 Oct 08
ever since i was a child, i said to myself, ill marry only for love. i guess respect follows if you truly love the person. respect is gained and not given. does love grow base on respect? or does respect grow base on love? i think its more of the latter..;o) i'll have a discussion on this, you better share your point of view..thanks!
@austere (2812)
• Philippines
16 Oct 08
i would want to have both.. i mean loving entails rerspect for the person you love, trust and friendship among other foundation to make it really strong. i said i want both because though i know love can fade, but if you respect teh person and you are friends and being with the person stays as pleasnt as alwyas then love doesnt fade. love only fades if doubts arise, and with doubt trust and respect is a blurr, then you get to hurt each other.. so guess we should always make sure we have a good relatiosnhip and we stay happy with ecah other so that negative energy that could ruin the happy relationship would not be triggered.
@kedves (728)
16 Oct 08
Respect can be lost as well as gained. Love can be lost as well as found. you know for me I think the most important thing is that you are friends with your partner as it will help the love grow more and respect build and last longer. being able to talk to your partner and share things as a friend is more important because it lasts longer and does not be affected by ups and downs of love. dont get me wrong if you can love and be friends with same person then you are in heaven :)
• India
16 Oct 08
I am a strong believer in arranged marriages. If you do not know your spouse before marriage and start knowing her after marriage, youbegin to confront strengths and weaknesses simultaneously. and love begins to grow. and lasts longer.
@Shar1979 (2722)
• United States
16 Oct 08
it's hard coz i feel both for my husband. i'm so head over heels inlove with him and i have so much respect for him. respect is something very important to us.
• United States
16 Oct 08
Both...I am head over heels in love with my partner and have nothing but respect for him. And relationships that are meant to withstand the test of time are a constant work in progress. There's no such thing as "instant" love. Instant attraction, yes. Crush, yes. But instant true love, no. Every marriage has to have some degree of respect and nurturing or it's doomed. And I can think of many more things in this world that more dangerous than being head over heels in love.