Anger Management

I don't have a quick temper. It takes a lot to get me angry and I think this is because the Bible tells me to remain calm when someone makes me angry, so I could think clear. When I feel my anger grow I try to pray for strength to not let it get the best of me.

I have a pretty slow fuse, so I tend to do OK, but my hubby is just the opposite. Damn, he just KAPLOW!!! goes off the deep end. He is trying to handle it now that we have kids, because he is verbally abusive. He doesn't hit, but the verbal abuse isn't good either. I guess we all have our feet of clay........

i control it by close my eyes

When I get angry, I usually hold it in. That's not good either. It is better to let it out and it is healty to be angry sometimes. But if it gets out of hand, you can distrupt you life. You can hurt those around you. And if it's that bad, you need to seek a proffesional to help control it.

I can't remember what movie or book discussed this concept, but picture anger as a little monster (just like your analogy) that lives in your head. Make it look however you want. Okay, got it? Now, imagine that that monster always wants to get out. It doesn't NEED to get out, it's not desperate, it just always wishes it were outside your head. Now, what happens if you don't ever let that monster out? It's going to get angrier and angrier, until one day it just busts right through its cage and goes on a freakin' rampage, destroying everything in sight. However, if you let that monster out, just a few times here and there, on a semi-regular basis, it stays satisfied. It still wishes it were outside, but it's more content to stay in its cage, because it knows that eventually, it will be given a taste of the outside world. The point is, you have to let your anger feed on you a little bit every once in a while to keep it under control. In order to accomplish this, my husband and I will have a pretty good fight about once a month. It can be about "real" stuff, like money or work, but mostly it's about stupid stuff, like dishes or toilet paper. Either way, we enter these arguments with the full acknowledgement that we are "feeding our monsters." Our fights are never bad, they always end well, and neither of us ever blows up at someone who doesn't deserve it or who we shouldn't blow up at. Hope this helps!

Anger is a completely normal, usually healthy, human emotion. But when it gets out of control and turns destructive, it can lead to problems—problems at work, in your personal relationships, and in the overall quality of your life The goal of anger management is to reduce both your emotional feelings and the physiological arousal that anger causes. You can't get rid of, or avoid, the things or the people that enrage you, nor can you change them, but you can learn to control your reactions.

It's gotten easier as I've gotten older. I don't get really angry any more. If I get upset, I usually cry. I may blow up a little once in awhile, but once it's out of my system I get over it fast. I've spent years helping high school BD students control their anger and know how difficult it can be.