What Can They Be Thinking...

I wouldn't get involved in that kind of situation...no way. I wouldn't want to hurt anyone in the family or cause embarassment like that....

wow, what a blow that would be! i do not condone cheating in any situation, and it would be outright strange and disrespectful for it to be with a member of the family! i would feel so betrayed if that happened to me, even moreso than if it was with some random stranger that my hubby cheated with. my husband and i are very faithful and honest, and have a wonderful relationship. i feel bad for those who get hurt by people they love like that. :(

In this situation I would be more disgusted with the family member than with the person who cheated on me. I feel this way because you expect family to be there for you, through thick and thin. You know friends, boyfriends and girlfriends will do things to hurt you. But you should be able to lean on your family. I would still let my children see their father, because they need him regardless of his ill choices. Of course it would be up to him to explain the situation to the child because I wouldn't want to be the one to clean up his mess.

That surely would be a confusing situation especially for kids...I would be hurt for starters...and probably go through the "Why Me" bit...But I do believe I would just move on...and hopefully with my children... It is hard to say, but unless it was actually happening to me I don't know what I would do...

I know how it hurts to be cheated and nobody could heal the broken heart except yourself.Its your choice what your going to do concerning your own feelings.For me i would move on and try to live a happy life with my daughter.I would let her understand what had happened and when she grows up it would be her choice to forgive the people who hurt us or maybe just ignore everything.I know it was already part of our lives but i want her to be happy and go on with her life without thinking the past but instead live up for her future.

I know this discussion was started four months ago but I seen that some people still replying so I thought I would respond also. I know of two different families that have dealt with this. One deals with my ex-husbands nephew and the other one is my brother. My ex-husbands nephew got married to a woman and they let her sister move in with them, the next thing you know, him and his sister-in-law had ran off together. After while he got a divorce and married his sister-in-law. He had children by both of them. My brothers wife ran off with my nephew. This really tore the family apart. He has two children that are about ten years younger then our nephew. It took a long time before him and my sister would even talk because of what her son and his wife had done. My feeling on this is if your that unhappy living with someone, leave, divorce them, but don't start a relationship with one of your partners family members. There are just to many people that will get hurt.

it is very much discussed these days on mylot! the situation is not very right to do.at least not a favourable situation. there are break ups everywhere. its apain still time heals.

Falling in love with someone else while being with another does happen. I have not done this but many do because they have found something they don't get at home. Usually that understanding from another and a companionship they also don't have at home. The family does suffer in this cases, but sometimes they find true happiness. And the family is better off than having parents that fight all of the time. I don't know what I do or say since I have not found myself in this situation.

I would consider this a very disloyal thing for a family member to even consider dating or even trying to date someone that is involved with a family members ex or b/f...I would not even consider dating a person that had ever been involved with one of my family members ,unless of course the family member just walked off and left a perfectly nice person for someone else,i might could see that happening maybe,but i have never been in that situation,and don't ever want to be...I know of a man that has two daughters.One daughter was married to this certain man,and she just fell out of love and left him...It so happened the sister of this one liked this man,and she started dating him and they ended up getting married...They did not fall out because of it and the (two sisters that is because the sister that had him first just did not love him anymore and he was a nice guy,and it did not bother the other sister...I though it strange somewhat but the sisters did not mind so i guess everybody was happy...I just don't like those things really..I have a friend that was married for like 20 years to this man and they divorced,this guy has tried dating me but i just do not like that and would never do such a thing...She left him for another guy,but i just could never ever see myself dating him even though she was a friend,and she left him....It just feels a little creepy to me....

I look at it this way. If that happens, I would think my partner was less of a person than I thought he was. This happens all the time. You think you know someone. If I had children, I would explain what happened and that it was wrong. Then I would let the children decide if they wanted to spend time with him.

My daughter was in a relationship and very much inlove with her partner, unfortunatley he took a likeing to her best friend, she may not be family but has always seemed as if is she is..of course my daughter got pregnant but her other half didn't want the baby she had him anyway but then found out that her partner had slpt with her best friend and others after, she was totally distraught and never spoke to her friend infact hated her for it but eventually she forgave her friend..her partner had split up with my daughter before she had her baby, and wasn't on the scene for a long while, my daughter and her friend are now ok their friendship will always be close but not as it was a long time ago and my grandson's dad now see's him every other weekend..even though I don't like it it is my daughters decision....blessings littleowl

it hurts to know that your partner is cheating,,,but it hurt you more if he/she cheated with one of your relative! i can just imagine the pain...

I think that would be a really hard one. I think it would be good if you talk about this with the whole family as well as the partner's family. I know it's hard but I think that's the only way to fix up things.

I dont think cheating on one of your family member is appropriate. Not only you committed a mistake of stealing someones partner but you also have ruin your relationship with a member of your family. I think that it is a selfish thing to do. If that will happen i dont think that person can still be considered as part of the family. Betraying a family member for me is something that is hard to forget and forgive. I dont either think that children still needs to be told about what is right from what is wrong. It is already a common sense that when a person is a spouse or a gf/bf of a family member you should not betray him/her. Not only it is immoral it is also the biggest mistake a person have done in his/her entire life.

That is an interesting question. While I can't say what I would do, I have often wondered about it myself. Why would I do so? Well, the people that live across the street from my roomie's folks has a woman who a few years ago took in her half-sister/half-cousin to raise with her daughters. It seems that her father married her aunt (mom's sister) and produced this girl. These people were such bad parents that the child was removed and placed with her sister/cousin. to top it all off, she was younger than the sister/cousin's 3 daughters. WEIRD!

hi twoey68 oh my yes I think I would feel even worse if I were in that situation and my hubby had cheated on me with a family member. Bad enough if it was with a stranger to me but worse with one's own family. I was never in this situation as my hubby never cheated on me, and I had verylittle in the way of family either. I dont know how I would handle it if I had been in that situation, I wou ld hav e been very angry and would ask for and get a divorce, and I would tell my c hildren that their dad was a louse, first and foremost.

i would never let myself get invoved in that kind of situation to start with. that's pure stupidity to start with.

It has never been in me to cheat on my husband, not even when we went together. But some certainly don't think a thing about cheating. Anything usually goes. They don't think about hurting their spouse or the children! I know; my daughter went through it two times, with 2 kids from both husbands. The first one never even gave her time to have the 2nd child! Men who cheat on their wives and have children are cheating on their children as well. I think you should be able to move away and forget them! Children deserve better. And for a man or woman to cheat with a relative is unthinkable to me! I'd cut off ties with the family member, even if it was a sister or brother! If they didn't love me enough to think my spouse was off limits, then they didn't love me, period! But there are so many people that think of themselves before anyone else. And they'll go behind your back and cheat with anyone. I've heard of a sister cheating on her sister with her husband and they later married. I couldn't handle it. I don't have a sister, so I wouldn't have to worry about that, not that I've ever worried about my husband cheating on me anyway and likewise with me.

Hi twoey68, What an awful sistuation to be in, firstly I would let the member of my family to have him and disown her, but I have no children so I don't have to worry about that. My husband and my sister's family gets on very well so we are all ok in that way. Tamara