if u are asked to let go from your partner will you let go?
November 7, 2008 3:27am CST
i have this friend whom i cant give any advice to her situation. its simple but its jst very hard to choose. okay, my friend is just 16 years old and now she's pregnant from her partner. the guy is nice but two of them havent yet finished their studies in which on thier country its very difficult to find a job without any eduacational attainment. two of them decided to speak to the girl's parents and the situation started now. the parents are willing to support the child but the man (who's the father) must never see his partner neither his own child. they couldnt live together coz they cannot afford to support a child but they love each other. my friend keep on crying and i know its not good for the baby. i dont know what to say to her.. if i could only support the child, i will but im also just a student. "sigh" can anybody tell me what to say to my friend??
3 people like this
8 Nov 08
oh,that's terrible.they have something urgent.so the best way is finding a way to tackle it.in my eyes,making a better talk between parents and them.if she gave birth to the baby,who will afford and feed ?if the problem can't be solved well,it will cause plenty of troubles.they must be cautious and clever.
8 Nov 08
ir we are already married of course i will not let go. but looking back at my previous relationship... i know i will let go. if you dont worth the person by asking you to let him go. them let him go. life doesnt end up with depending yours in one person. you could have done more things by being with a lot of friends... without any bitterness or what...
7 Nov 08
migenKC, I think apart from the fact that the unborn child will be given to the girl's parents upon birth for care. I am sure that they are forbidding the couple from continuing as lovers and/or married couples on the grounds of their academic well being. Look, I am sure that after the birth of the child nothing as far as the relationship is concerned, is certain and definite. Who is to say that they will remain together? Who is to say that the boy will not have a change in heart one day? Who is to assure that your friend will not be able to find another man to love and be loved? What is the reason? Because of the child? Even marriages today end in divorce, so what makes you think that the relationship between the both of them is a SURE thing? Don't be idealistic here, for love does not hold anyone at ransom. I think as parents, they have taken more salt than the rice you have taken and it is not easy for them too to arrive at such a decision. But, if you would just sit back and think about the reasons behind their decision here. I am sure you will easily get the answer thinking along the path of my questions. The last thing they want would be their child loosing an equal opportunity to excel in their studies and turn out a better person and carve out a better future. Rather than throwing oneself back to the threshold of uncertainties in a relationship with so much other uncertainties in life, it would be for the best of the both of them to remain as casual friends. Not binding anybody to this relationship and concentrate on what is the task ahead of them. Life has to move on and right now at such a tender age considerations like immaturity, feelings, hardships and harsh realities are so green to all of you, isn't it better to take a step backwards at both ends and begin from where one had fell and dropped off? Tell your friend to accept the conditions, as her parents are just thinking ahead for them. Casual friendship will be alright nothing else, because one unwanted pregnancy has resulted in their carelessness and inability to handle each other. So, in order stop history from repeating, I think it will be good to go along the flow of the the parents, at least for now till graduation. Take care and learn the meaning of obedience for once.
8 Nov 08
you've got the point. it might be hard at once but my friend has to face the consiquence of her mistake. the only tough part is the period of time that she knows what she needs: the father, the only person who can make the moment complete. it is on one angle that it seems like the parents are very rational and but never considerate. but if we weigh what has the whole situation, the parents at this moment is the only key to make the child atleast be provided of what he/she needs. thks.
7 Nov 08
I think it's better to think of the baby in her.. It's a human life after all, and that she should really take good care of it.. As for her bf, he's older, and he knows how to take care of himself to a certain extend, and he also has got his parents to guide him.. Though they are still quite young now, but it's responsiblity we are talking about here, and are the both of them ready to commit to each other?? If not, it's betetr to be separated now than in the future when things go horribly wrong..
7 Nov 08
Your friends' situation is really hard. But if we are going to take it rationally, the parents decision is the best thing to do. Life isn't easy as what we think it is. They are still young and it wouldn't be good if they're going to think of their feelings only. Anyway, everything has it's own time.
• New Zealand
7 Nov 08
Hey there I was just in this situation about 2 weeks ago and I leaved him but we have missed each other since but in your friends situation sorry but I could not tell you other then some times family's can be pains when you have a big choice like that to make good luck to your friend though.