Querying the Mantra of loosing weight

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I have been over weight from the time I have understood what over weight is.( now age 40). I have been reducing my food intake hoping it would give some help in reducing wt. No gusses, I have failed. Can any smart lady (because they usually are slim and know food very well) give me some input on food habits. Such as what not to eat and when not to eat etc. thanks