Apparently My Son Does Not Like School!!!

Canada
November 26, 2008 8:49pm CST
He told me this this morning and refused to go He told me that he wasn't going and that he was staying home...He even went on to say that his EA told him there was no school today! For those of you who don't know, I have a five year old boy with Autism and he has loved going to school since September but lately (the last month or so) things have been going down hill and this morning was the height of it for me where I ended up trying to carry him (Too Heavy) Push him pull him to school literally and he ended up down on the ground a couple of times and tried to go back home...He mainly just stood motionless on the side walk and was unwilling to move! We were late because of all this arriving at the school and then I could not get him to the class room...I had to get someone to go and get his EA to take him from me...It was ridiculous! I do not know what I am going to do with him!!! Can I run away now? I'm at the end of my rope here! ~Heavens~
3 people like this
7 responses
@_sketch_ (5709)
• United States
27 Nov 08
No. Don't run away. You say that he used to love school, so something must have changed. Perhaps he is having trouble with some classmates? It's gotta be a social issue. That is usually the case when kids dont want to go to school. Try to talk to him and find out the reason. If he wont talk to you maybe he will talk to a counselor?
2 people like this
• Canada
27 Nov 08
My son is five and has Autism... He often does not understand what I am saying to him and so he can not tell me what the problem is nor a counselor...I am sure it is a social problem...He is changing so much and it is making things very difficult! ~Heavens~
1 person likes this
@_sketch_ (5709)
• United States
27 Nov 08
Well even if he doesnt pay attention to what you are saying or respond to the conversation in any apparent way, he probably can still pick up some things u are saying even if unconciously. If I were you, I'd still talk to him and reassure him that school is a good place to be. You never know, something might just stick.
1 person likes this
• Canada
28 Nov 08
That actually sounds like a good idea sketch! Thanks ~Heavens~
@carmelanirel (20979)
• United States
27 Nov 08
I think around this time of year, most kids feel that way. The newest of the school year and the upcoming holidays and shorter days can make a child feel like not going. Your is showing his displeasure of school by physically not moving, mine on the other hand keeps asking me to home school him. I have no advice for your child, because of his Autism, you would have to ask someone who knows more about it. With my son, I told him the truth, I can't, I need to find a job and won't be here to home school him.
• Canada
27 Nov 08
Thanks so much for stopping by but I'm not sure that is the reason for mine I'm afraid something has happened at school socially with him that has made him not like it now! Autism is no picnic at times! ~Heavens~
2 people like this
• United States
28 Nov 08
Oh I am so sorry. I hope you can find out what happened and how to help him..
1 person likes this
• Canada
28 Nov 08
I hope so too Carmela! HUGS ~Heavens~
@gabs8513 (48710)
• United Kingdom
27 Nov 08
Sweetie I think you need to have a word with his Teacher about this and see why of all a sudden he does not want to go, there has to be reason for it When you run away are you coming to stay with me??? Big Hugs to you
2 people like this
• Canada
27 Nov 08
Thanks Gabs! I have a fifteen minute interview with her on the fifth of December...We'll see how much I can fit in then! Sure, if I can scrape up the money, I'll come and live with you! ~Heavens~
1 person likes this
• Canada
27 Nov 08
Can I come live with you too, gabs? Life sure has gotten 'challenging' of late for our family. Too many major changes on the horizon. My heart goes out to heavens here. I really don't quite get why the drastic change in her son, either. Big Hugs to you.
@someonesmom (5765)
• Canada
27 Nov 08
It's hard for me to know what to say here, heavens. I saw this discussion in the wee hours, and was planning on coming back to it. I'm so sorry, and I just don't get this. It seems like he's regressing in a few areas. You and your son sure don't need this. I know when you recently shared with me, about the difficulty his EA was having with him, it was worrisome. Then the fact that he no longer would participate in gym. Now this! I 'know' when you've mentioned here, that he expressed verbally that he didn't want to go to school, it would be something like "No school" etc. What a challenge for you to try to get him there. Again, I'm so sorry. I realize you have so much on your plate as it is. I was thinking the other day too, of the possibility of him having to change schools next fall, due to no EA. So many decisions, and then these changes. Unfortunately, it could well be what 'BC Mike' has expressed here. So many people don't seem to realize the full effects of autism. This could just be one of the sad realities of his condition. You'll likely need more than fifteen minutes to talk with his teacher (and maybe get his EA to sit in.) I do hope and pray for the best in all of this. I'm sorry I'm not very much help. I really do admire your tenacity and determination, when it comes to your son. Where would he be without you. Please try to hang in there. Love and Hugs to you.
1 person likes this
• Canada
27 Nov 08
Hi Mom!I guess you are on here now.... I have to work for three today so I'm not on here long but to respond to my topic here! Yes, he was fine all morning and even let me help him with his coat etc. but then when I said let's go he said, "No School, me stay home!" "Me no like school" I thought oh brother what now!?! I had no idea that he would be as difficult as he was He also said at one point, "Mrs. G said no more school today!" That is what he calls his EA! He was trying so hard not to have to go!! I was pushing, pulling, carrying him all the way to school and I had my cart because I had so much stuff to pick up yesterday...was out all day but that is another story....SIGH I too am afraid that Mike is right on this one...I think we have a long road ahead of us with school! I guess I am going to have to seriously look at the special classes for next year or it'll be disastrous I am afraid!! Love and Hugs to you! ~Heavens~ P.S I know Gabs has offered but you are so much closer, Can I just come and live with you?
1 person likes this
• Canada
27 Nov 08
Wow. He sure did let you know exactly how he felt. I do hope you don't have to go through this every school day now. As for the special classes for next year, this is how I feel too. Even though it's unfortunate to have to give his current school up, without an EA there's no way he'd be properly looked after. Who knows what might happen! Things are quite stressful 'here' nowadays, so I don't think you'd get much of a break. I sometimes feel like running away too. Seriously though, maybe next year when my daughter is at leadership camp, you can arrange to spend the night. It'd be just like old times, and if you could do some advance planning (regarding your son etc.) maybe we can do this. You never know, it may be your last chance to spend the night in 'this house' too. Hugs
1 person likes this
• Canada
28 Nov 08
So, She is attending Leadership Camp again in the new year... That would be real nice, if we can plan it ahead of time! Love and Hugs ~Heavens~
1 person likes this
@piya84 (2590)
• India
29 Nov 08
Hey dats nt atall abnormal thing...i mean many childrent dont like it relay...i was one such a fellow always who always hated schoool no matter how good frends i had there.FOr me doing somethin compulsory ....esp in wich i dont have any interest was most irritating thing for me.I use to bung school twice a week..any way in ur case i feel its somethin else going on...as ur child use to like it first...n then start hating it...there must be some fight ....or something related to homework teacher thing....try to speak with him when he is in good moood...n dont yell on him when he told you real reason....no matter how silly it is.:)
1 person likes this
• Canada
29 Nov 08
Thanks piya84 and welcome to My Lot! I do hope that you enjoy yourself here Thanks so much for the advice! My boy is five and has Autism and so it is hard for me to communicate with him so that he understands what I am saying or asking...He can't formulate clear answers either or hold on a conversation so it adds an extra difficulty to things like this! I feel as you do though that something has happened at school and aim to find out what the problem is through talking to the school and trying to piece things together about this! Thanks once again! ~Heavens~
@cfmedrano (240)
• Philippines
28 Nov 08
I may not really have felt what you are going through but I look up to you. I think it's really hard and given the task to take care of a special child is a very big challenge in life. I don't know how to lengthen your rope but just remember to always put love in your heart every time you deal with your son. I know there are times like this even with normal kids. If love prevails, you can conquer all.
1 person likes this
• Canada
28 Nov 08
First of all, Welcome to My Lot and thanks so much for stopping by with your kind and thoughtful words! It means a lot to me! ~Heavens~
@cynthiann (18613)
• Jamaica
27 Nov 08
This must be so difficult for you and my heart goes out to you. I had a son with learning disabilities and that was such a challenge but of course nothing like you are facing. Something has happened to make him hate school and the child just cannot express himself to tell you what it is. A 15 min interview wit his teacher is not long enough! Does he see a counsellor or anyone else? I don't know how autistic he is so you must be the one to stand up frim and find out what it is. Maybe someone in the class said something which has upset him. Is this possibler? How much does he understand? I wish that I could be of help to you. Try and be kind to yourself and do something just for you. God Bless. I hope that things work out with your son.
1 person likes this
• Canada
28 Nov 08
I know fifteen minutes is not long enough but that is what they are scheduled for! We are given no choice in that! I need to schedule a separate meeting to work all of this out I think! A counselor would be no good as he does not carry on a conversation and his understanding is very limited! I am wondering if the children are ignoring him when he is asking to play or if someone did say something to him or do something...I have no idea! He seems to be changing so much and fast!!! Thanks so much for your kind words here and your concern! ~Heavens~