My Mother is turning 70 yrs old in December and is raising great grand kids-Ouch
By yparson
@yparson (581)
United States
December 2, 2008 4:58pm CST
My Mother is the great grandmother of 7 and out of the 7 she has out of the kindness of her hearts decided that she could raise 3 of them ages 2 yr, 4 yr & 6 yrs old plus a 13 yrs old grandson which she had to adopt. All from one daughter who has a drug problem and can't even keep her own grandkids or her own son. My mother has always taken in other family members kids. The 2 year old is the 4th generation that my mother has raised since raising my aunt on my fathers side. I know it sounds a bit complicated. But, when Mother gets tired, I have to remind her that these are great grand kids and its too much for her especially at her age. I help when and where I can, but I tell my sister that she needs to get her act together and help out with her responsibility. Ouch! My mother is a retired Nurse so I understand her caring side, but I also understand that she needs to take a break and enjoy life go visit the kids instead of them visiting and staying. Am I wrong for feeling the way I do?
1 person likes this
2 responses
@Lindalinda (4111)
• Canada
3 Dec 08
My goodness, I really admire your mother. I don't know where she will get the energy to deal with three little ones. I almost feel guilty. I will be turning 70 next year and I always told my kids that don't ever think even in your wildest imagination that I will raise your children. I believe in day care and early learned social behaviour that can be best acquired in day care centres where the workers have no other obligations except looking after the little ones. I have one little granddaughter. She is 16 months old and I love her to bits. I visit her in the day care centre and sometimes I pick her up and take her to her house when the parents can't make it before 6 p.m. The penalty is 1 dollar per minute if you are late. Also I go to their house when she is sick and spell off one of the parents who then works from home. I feed and change her, play with her, go for a walk with her and leave when the second parent gets home. Even that tires me out, but it gives me joy and when I get home I can relax and put up my feet. Hats off to your mom.
1 person likes this
@yparson (581)
• United States
3 Dec 08
Thank you for your response. I'm trying to get her to learn the meaning of "Just Say No". I'm also looking for daycare for the younger two, but they are still in the behavior training process learning to interact with other children. My two kids now 25yr & 18 yrs were in daycare and were latchkey kids at 6 weeks old because I had to work. Yes, my mother is tire and I hate reminding her but someone has to and God bless my 82 yr old father for putting up with it all. Sometimes I feel its good for the kids to be around because it keeps my parents active when before they just sat around after retirement not involved into much.
@warmweatherwoman (2233)
• Atlantic City, New Jersey
3 Dec 08
No you are not wrong for feeling that you mother needs a break. It's only fair- she is 70 and should be enjoying these years ~ but ~ on the other hand- thank heaven for her that she is able and willing to take on the delicate task of making sure her grandchildren do not suffer due to the choices of your sister. I applaud her!
@warmweatherwoman (2233)
• Atlantic City, New Jersey
3 Dec 08
I ask that question to myself more than too often. I made the consious decision NOT to have children because I know I wouldn't put my all into it- I think people need to do more "THINKING" before hoping into bed to make babies!
