Empathy can be a BAD thing!

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What do you think? Does this sound ridiculous to you? I've always been a big advocate of empathy. I've always felt it's important to be empathetic to how others feel. I've been a big believer of the golden rule. I've had a change of heart. No, no. I haven't given up on empathy completely. But I have realize that there is such a thing as too much empathy. One way that empathy can be unhealthy is when you get into the habit of contantly caring about how others feel, to the point where you start neglecting your own needs. It's easy to do. I did it. I think all parents want to give their children some of the things they did not get as a child. Well, one thing I didn't receive much of as a child was empathy. Therefore I promised myself that I would always be an understanding parent. This isn't to say that I never had rules and was never tough. Just not often enough. I was never a morning person. I have a child who is not a morning person. So...I understand. What does that mean? I have called his name and pushed him along about 50 times in a morning. Too much empathy! Another example. My father. He is aging. I don't want to take away his quality of life. I don't want to strip him of his dignity. I've tried to defer to his wishes on a regular basis. This has allowed him to neglect his nutrition and neglect himself to the point where he is now worse of than he would be if I'd been more assertive. I'm not advocating that people give up on empathy. I'm not saying it's good to always try to get your own way. What I am saying is that we all need to look more closely at where the line is between a healthy dose of empathy and too much empathy. I chose to put this under "love" because it is often those we love, who we give too much empathy to. What are your thoughts and experiences on this topic?