Is he trully sincere?
By Llonorra22
@Llonorra22 (1150)
Philippines
December 5, 2008 1:07am CST
Hello fellow mylotters, for the past two years, I remained single but happy after a two-year old relationship. Then, just last week this guy approached me (when I was in church)he suddenly asked permission to go to my house to formally court me. I was really surprised when he told me that. For him being a gentleman, I allowed him to do so. As he went on, I asked him if he is that serious with what he is doing. I asked this because, I really can't believe that a normal guy, would court or like someone with disability. (i have cerebral palsy) He told me that he is very aware of that and he doesn't care what people might say to him and that he is ready for it. He even told me that he love me and he is willing to love me whole-heatedly... I admit it's really good to hear but I really can't tell how far will his 'love?' last? Or is he really that willing to spend the rest of his life with me. How can you tell if the man is really true or sincere to his word. Should I give this man a chance? (he'll be here tomorrow to visit me again) Do you think that he will really love me, inspite and despite of my condition? Please share your thoughts and opinion on this. Happy posting and Godspeed...
7 people like this
29 responses
@Pose123 (21635)
• Canada
6 Dec 08
Hi Llonorra, I cannot of course speak for this man because I do not know him,what I do know however that it is possible for a normal person to want to court and be with someone with a disability. Love is so much more than a physical relationship and two people can be happy together if they truly enjoy each other's company. If this man is a gentleman as you say, he would not want to court you if he was not sincere. I would advice you to take time to get to know each other well, don't rush into anything, and if he enjoys being with you, you will know this. If you don't want a physical relationship until you are married, he should respect your wishes in that way as well. If it works out and you fall in love, your disability should not matter at all. Blessings.
1 person likes this
@annierose (19118)
• Philippines
5 Dec 08
Well, you cannot tell if a guy is really sincere with his feeling on you if you will not give him a chance.Everyone deserves a chance. It is better to give him opportunity rather than having regrets in the end.Let him prove to you his words. Do not judge him without him proving his sincerity.Weather he is sincere or not, it will be shown later on.His actions will reveal it.Let time alone test the words he said to you.I can say that you should not look down on yourself just because of your disability.Everyone deserves to love and be loved. Your condition right now is not a reason for someone not to feel real love for you. Maybe he has seen something on you which he had not seen before to other women.There is a beauty in you that captures his attention.I believe that God created us equally.And I know that He gives beauty in each one of us.And beauty does not just lies in outside appearance only but can be inside of the individuals heart also.And that is the one that really matters.
@laydee (12798)
• Philippines
6 Dec 08
I totally agree annierose.
I mean, why shouldn't you give him a chance? After all, he knows your condition, you've warned him. Plus, what have you got to lose? It's not as if you're going to marry him tomorrow.
Give him a chance and just see from there where it would take you too. Plus also, enjoy the moment. It's mighty courageous of him to approach a woman in church as a stranger you know, that's actually priceless this time of generation, men tend to want things fast and they're impatient enough to know you more.
Good luck!
God bless.
Great response by the way, annierose.
@robert19ph (4577)
• Philippines
17 Dec 08
[i]Hello Llonorara22,
I think, there is nothing impossible in love. He something in you that he fall in love with. You can give him a chance to prove his love to you. Time will tell if his love to you is lasting. I think you can work it out and make you relationship work. The first step has begun and it's now up to you two to work it out.
Regards. [/i]
@Llonorra22 (1150)
• Philippines
23 Dec 08
yah... i think so.. thanks for responding!
1 person likes this
@candymarie (1368)
• Canada
8 Dec 08
....wow, you're just starting to date him, and he thinks he loves you? And you're talking about spending the rest of your life with him?
Why the rush?
Or has this been going on for a while now?
Because from what I read above in your posting, you were in a 2 year relationship, then single for 2 years, right?
@Llonorra22 (1150)
• Philippines
10 Dec 08
Yes, you're right. He is really rushing things.. I already told him not to rush things and enjoy our friendship first...
@UtopianIdealist (1604)
• United States
7 Jan 09
I would like to assume someone with not so sincere intentions would not approach you in church to ask for your companionship.
I feel horrible that you have been made to feel that someone without a disability could not understand you. You deserve love, companionship and happiness. The worst that it could be is temporary, which sounds like it isn't the case. Either way, it is better to feel that joy than to miss it. Perhaps him approaching you at church is a sign?
@UtopianIdealist (1604)
• United States
7 Jan 09
People do underestimate friendship. A good friend can get you through difficult times and be an ear without the complication or pressure of intimacy.
@Llonorra22 (1150)
• Philippines
7 Jan 09
Thanks for the kind word my friend but I already rejected him. I tried but I can't feel anything for him I can only give him friendship nothing more nothing less.. Happy posting!
@crystal2008 (21)
• China
5 Dec 08
er~~`~ actually, i am not sure about that ,but i think you should give him a chance, and try to believe him, but you can not trust totally only if you know him very well.
maybe he is really love, be confident,you are great!give both of you a chance!
Hope you two can have a good result!
@Sheldon25 (193)
• Jamaica
6 Dec 08
Hello, I think you should give him a chance to prove if he really care. But please dont trust him a 100% give yourself time to know him. If he is not what you were looking for you wont be hurt because you didn't put your all in him I promise you this will work.
@vanities (11395)
• Davao, Philippines
6 Dec 08
great!! that is good!! i guess he is sincere!! and yet loving somebody means you are prepared to get hurt at the same..just be careful and think wisely..but since he knows your condition beforehand then i guess he is sincere...just follow your instinct and your heart in situation like this..be happy and God Bless..
@savypat (20216)
• United States
6 Dec 08
Why not take what he has to offer and just wait and see. Enjoy this relationship for now and don't read to much into it. Many people are care givers and these people have a lot of love to give. Don't let your heart get involved until you know him much better and can see why he is attracted to you. Remember to live in the present and let the future take care of it's self. Blessings
@becnh83 (806)
• Philippines
6 Dec 08
hhhhmmm...sounds complicated...but try to give him a chance anyway you will know in the future if he really serious you can see it in his action but i guess he is sincere with you because a man who visits the girl in the house is not as easy as that especially nowadays...
@Llonorra22 (1150)
• Philippines
9 Dec 08
Yes, it's really unusual these days.. Thanks for responding...
@messageme (2821)
• United States
8 Dec 08
That's kind of early to say you love someone...It seems sort of weird. I would do what the first person said and be careful. Get to know friends, family, ect. Don't let him take anything from you until you are 100% certain he is for real. There are a lot of really nice people out there, but there is also that bad mix too. I don't ever hear of anyone formally courting anyone anymore and to say he loves you after a very short period of time? Hummm, makes me wonder, but I don't know him either. Go with your gut feeling you will know what is right.
@freda529 (136)
• China
8 Dec 08
It happened all of a sudden.But if you have a good impression of him,and I can tell you have a hope on him,I should say yea,you can give him a chance.But you know,hope the best and prepare the worst.And you be careful.Don't fall in his love so quickly.Give him a chance while confirming if he is sincere.
@Llonorra22 (1150)
• Philippines
10 Dec 08
Luckily, I'm not in love with him. It's just that I wanted to give him and my self a chance. And we'll see what happens next. If God will allow I'll gladly accept him as my boyfriend. For now we;re just enjoying each others company. Godspeed...
@NikkiLuvsAlex (319)
• United States
6 Dec 08
Everything happens for a reason. He could be someone sent to you by God to shhare your life with, or your worst nightmare with some hidden ulterior motives in mind. Pray about it and watch him closely for a little while. Talk to him a little about it if you want to and see what he has to say.
@lagirl1966 (709)
• United States
6 Dec 08
I would have to say check him out to. It would be a wonderful dream if he was really an old fashioned guy with old fashioned beliefs, but you never know. I would be careful. Find out if he has any money and what he does for a living. Guys can lie and they have certainly lied to me. I have intestinal and stomach conditions and depression that are quite serious so I have stopped looking for someone. I didn't think anyone would want to be with me because of that. But he knows your condition and he dosent seem to care. So he might be just one in a million. Those kind of guys are hard to find. I would still be cautious. Good luck to you.
@Llonorra22 (1150)
• Philippines
9 Dec 08
Yes I know that. That why I'm really thinking hard about this. Godspeed...
@Suzette265 (51)
• Philippines
6 Dec 08
What i can say about it is that you should think positive. Never allow negative thinking ruin your mind because for me, it's better to give him a chance to know you better and know him more better and whatever it takes, just be happy always because God knows and see everything... Just be friendly and be sincere to him so that he will do the same thing which is to become Sincere too... take care and smile always my friend...
@mjmlagat (3170)
• Philippines
5 Dec 08
There's nothing wrong at all if you give the man a fair chance especially that you've noticed his sincerity. I believe in women's intuition so if you feel he deserves to show off himself to you, then go ahead and be happy about it. Good luch and God bless.
@Llonorra22 (1150)
• Philippines
9 Dec 08
Yeah, I'm doing that. In fact, he was here yesterday.... I'll just wait and see what happens next.. Godspeed...
@infoeaglesforce (49)
• Nigeria
5 Dec 08
Hey, it is very dificulty to really know the state of man's mind, sometimes what we say is not what we meant. Mind you, he may also be sincere in what he say's. What i will advice you to do is to give him a chance to discover if he trully love's you because the more time you spend together the more chance to know who he really his. One more last advice, never let him know all about you especially if you are more ok (reach) than him until you discover who he really his. Thanks
@kitttenskysong (676)
• United States
5 Dec 08
Give him a chance, that's what I say. It might be the best decision you ever made. Or it could be a bad on.
But and this is the big thing you'll never know if you don't take a leap of faith. Besides everyone deserves a chance.
@minhaj09 (236)
• Bangladesh
5 Dec 08
dear,its your right having love from whome who feels you. its known to you very well than us that how he is. so, only you can decide what are you going to do. just close your eyes & ask God whats about your future together,if your heart says its ok,then proceed.
you've to decide will you be able to offer him mental peace or not.if your heart says,you'll try by your best,i think you should pay positive response though disability.
love is inherent, never think negative about love but be sure if he really loves you or not as its a lifetime journey for both of you.
&................ have a deal between you that you both will sacrifice for both than other.it'll help you building a great understanding for the days above honey!
@shebeck (114)
• Jamaica
5 Dec 08
Hello,Do not trust this man he probably want to take disadvantage of you because of your disability. Just let him know that you do not want a serious relationship right now, just be social friends with him and please do not be alone with him because he might hurt you. If he is sincere about what he said only time will tell, by just being social friends with him and going out in groups and from there you can tell if he will stick around or just want to use you and run.
I will hope that he has not ask you for you to be close with him. Just be careful men can be very slick when they are after something or someone.
@Llonorra22 (1150)
• Philippines
9 Dec 08
Yes, that's what I told him yesterday. I made friends him and told him not to rush things and know each other more. Godspeed...
@jun_sabumnim (37)
• Philippines
5 Dec 08
OOOOh thats great if he really loves you will God giving you a nice gift, give him a chance and am sure for lesser number of days you knows what is really his intentions it good or what. see yahh and good day
