"I can't live without you...."
By Storm
@jcj_111776 (3216)
Philippines
January 2, 2009 11:15pm CST
How many times have we heard this?From romantic movies to real-life situations. Then we stop and think. Can this really be true? Is it true for you?
The first time I fell in love... was also my first heartbreak. I can still remember as if my heart was literally breaking into pieces. It was hard to breathe, as if there's something crushing my chest. To be honest, I really thought, it wasn't worth waking up anymore to a brand new day. My line of thinking was, what's the use of breathing and living when I'll just be so miserable thinking and missing him the whole time? Knowing that there's no chance we can get back together again. And knowing that the day will come that he will soon forget me and love someone else.
But I lived through it. The whole miserable and lonely two years without him. It was hard and I have to fight my way through. I had to keep giving myself a reason everyday why I need to get up in bed and continue my life without him. I told myself, I owe myself a chance to heal and wait for the time that love will find me the second time around.
And it did find me. Now, I'm happily married for seven years to a wonderful and enigmatic man. We have a 5 year old son and now, we're waiting for our second child to be born, three months from now.
In my case, I don't believe that when you lose someone you love, you stop living your life. You still can live your life, if you just have the strength and determination to fight your way through the thick loneliness that will surely overcome you. It's just a matter of choice.
In my case, I don't believe that when you lose someone you love, you stop living your life. You still can live your life, if you just have the strength and determination to fight your way through the thick loneliness that will surely overcome you. It's just a matter of choice.2 people like this
10 responses
@michaeldadona (5684)
• Malaysia
3 Jan 09
I am excited reading your nice and firm synecdoche in your story. With your verve words making reader can feel the energy contain in each alphabet till the last small dot for full stop. Agree with your statement where there is an equilibrium in our life negotiating between loss and gain, where better take loss at the first place and take gain next to it.
I Can't Live Without You
( Harry Nilsson )
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=btaGemAihYY
1 person likes this
@jcj_111776 (3216)
• Philippines
3 Jan 09
Hi michael
Thank you for the link. I actually like the song eventhough it's a sad one.
Thank you for the link. I actually like the song eventhough it's a sad one.1 person likes this
@jcj_111776 (3216)
• Philippines
3 Jan 09
Thank you for telling me that, Michael and I'm glad you're back on your feet. That was some close call you had. And thanks again for the another link to my favorite song.
1 person likes this
@michaeldadona (5684)
• Malaysia
3 Jan 09
OK I answer your question one-by-one, accordingly, to my paragraph. Here we go;
Yeah on YouTube commented by englishman1960.
Barbara Streisand and Bryan Adam's "I Finally Found Someone".
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RUJKtLMCClk
My absent 'coz got to do with my offline work. Actually am an American - an expatriate in Malaysia. My late mom(d:8.8.2008) from Malaysia and my father a Marylander(Ocean City). January 15, 2008 I got heart attack(angina & infarction) and undergone angiogram + angioplastiy treatment(ICU - 5 days). Doctor asked me to go for bypass surgery. I avoided it and took an alternative treatment for 'Chelation' and 'EECP Therapy' - 20 & 35 protocols, respectively. Now am back to normal.
I'll be back permanently to Ocean City, Maryland on Dec. 31, 2010.
1 person likes this
@kprofgames (3091)
• United States
3 Jan 09
I don't know how this is going to sound, but I'm pretty much a straight shooter.
Love is a wonderful thing; however, if a person thinks they "can't live without another" well then, they didn't have much of a life to begin with did they. I know the feeling and I admire those who hold tha candle burning for their spouse or s/o over the years, but you still have to be an independant person. You can't always rely on another person to complete you. If you do, they you simply aren't a whole person and in all reality, you don't have what it takes to completely give back in a relationship.
Is this some romantic sentament? I think so. I also think the fairy tale of everything is going to be okay because you are in love with a person is the wrong message to be sending. To me? That just says you're not a whole person to begin with.
I think I'd much rather be in a relationship with a person that wants me there over they need be there to complete themselves.
1 person likes this
@jcj_111776 (3216)
• Philippines
5 Jan 09
Hi
I like the way you answer. You remind me of someone telling me that when we fall in love, it shouldn't be a 100%. That we ought to leave at least 10% to ourselves. So that if the inevitable parting comes, we're still left with something.
It's nice to hear those lines like, "you complete me", but I know better. I'm very much in love with my husband but I still make sure that I don't give everything. Because I know it will be my own downfall if I lose him.
The first respondent in this discussion compared it to something like parasitism. Relying on another person to complete them. And what you said is true. If we rely on another person to complete us, then how is that relationship to survive if in the first place, we are only expecting to be the receiving end of that relationship?
Thank you for sharing your insight about this. I really liked how you answered it.
I like the way you answer. You remind me of someone telling me that when we fall in love, it shouldn't be a 100%. That we ought to leave at least 10% to ourselves. So that if the inevitable parting comes, we're still left with something.
It's nice to hear those lines like, "you complete me", but I know better. I'm very much in love with my husband but I still make sure that I don't give everything. Because I know it will be my own downfall if I lose him.
The first respondent in this discussion compared it to something like parasitism. Relying on another person to complete them. And what you said is true. If we rely on another person to complete us, then how is that relationship to survive if in the first place, we are only expecting to be the receiving end of that relationship?
Thank you for sharing your insight about this. I really liked how you answered it.@kprofgames (3091)
• United States
5 Jan 09
No problem, as I said - straight shooter. Say it like I see it. That's the only way to be true to yourself and thank you for seeing that.
1 person likes this
@Lakota12 (42600)
• United States
3 Jan 09
hmmmmmm no it wasnt here.
so I will try again
yep I have heard that but was never said to me.
HAd a wonderful life with 2nd hubby for 42 1/2 years . wehn he passed I just wanted to lay in thebed where he was and just not get up.
BUt then other things had to be done.
I cried for almost 3 years as daughter said at a drop of a hat.
SHe couldnt talk to me with out me cring its getting better now.
been 4 years adn I beleive he is still close by like my gaudian angel!
1 person likes this
@jcj_111776 (3216)
• Philippines
5 Jan 09
Hello again Lakota and a Happy New Year to you
It's a good thing your post remained. I still wonder what happened to the other one.
So many memories to treasure in those long years. And I wish my husband and I will have the same. And I'm glad you're coping better. I understand that it's hard to get on with life, living it without him. And I know the most difficult part is missing him everyday.
In my case, I had to stay at my sister's place for two months just this October last year, so I can recover my health due to my very delicate pregnancy sickness. And I missed my husband everyday.
It's good to hear from you again
It's a good thing your post remained. I still wonder what happened to the other one.
So many memories to treasure in those long years. And I wish my husband and I will have the same. And I'm glad you're coping better. I understand that it's hard to get on with life, living it without him. And I know the most difficult part is missing him everyday.
In my case, I had to stay at my sister's place for two months just this October last year, so I can recover my health due to my very delicate pregnancy sickness. And I missed my husband everyday.
It's good to hear from you again 
@raijin (10345)
• Philippines
3 Jan 09
I just can't resisit entering onto this topic of your's my friend, as you can see, I haven't been here for a long time now. But since I've read this wonderful post of your's, I might as well rejoice with you! Hehehe!
But before anything else, let me first say Hello and Hi to you!;)
Loving someone else is like living your own dream, in which sometimes you can't even imagine that it would be this good and as to where you don't even want to wake up at all, anymore.. I'm proud of you my friend, keep loving each other and goodluck to you and your second baby..
P.S. visit my message to you on your friendster..;)
@jcj_111776 (3216)
• Philippines
5 Jan 09
Hi raijin and welcome back!
And before I forget, let me greet you a very Happy 2009! You've been MIA (missing in action), too here at Mylot. And I did, too. Thank you. My husband and I are very excited especially as the month of April fastly approaches. Our 5 year old son is excited too, to see his baby sibling. Still don't have any idea if the baby's a boy or girl. Because we planned to keep it as a surprise!
And I have already sent you a reply to your message for me at Friendster. Didn't realize you were out of the country.
You're right. Being in love is like living in a wonderful dream. But sometimes, dreams has its own unhappy parts. But then, I believe that what makes being alive and deeply in love so much more exciting. Hmmm... but you didn't mention if you have been in love yourself. Being mysterious huh?
Hope to see more of you here at Mylot and if you have the opportunity, post your own discussions. I missed replying to them. Take care.
And before I forget, let me greet you a very Happy 2009! You've been MIA (missing in action), too here at Mylot. And I did, too. Thank you. My husband and I are very excited especially as the month of April fastly approaches. Our 5 year old son is excited too, to see his baby sibling. Still don't have any idea if the baby's a boy or girl. Because we planned to keep it as a surprise!
And I have already sent you a reply to your message for me at Friendster. Didn't realize you were out of the country.
You're right. Being in love is like living in a wonderful dream. But sometimes, dreams has its own unhappy parts. But then, I believe that what makes being alive and deeply in love so much more exciting. Hmmm... but you didn't mention if you have been in love yourself. Being mysterious huh?
Hope to see more of you here at Mylot and if you have the opportunity, post your own discussions. I missed replying to them. Take care.
@noniefam (284)
• Indonesia
3 Jan 09
i heard it so many times from romantic movie to real life. it can be true in our life n its true for me. but sometimes someone we love leave us n love somebody else n we cannt do anything even breath but we must live for our live. its hurt to loose someone we love. but we still can pray for someone we love n show that he/she is so special for us
1 person likes this
@jcj_111776 (3216)
• Philippines
5 Jan 09
Hi noniefam
That's what I did. After being so lonely for two years, I got tired and prayed for God to help me. Meet the right man I can spend my life with. Recovering from a heartbreak seems like an impossible challenge but the rewards from overcoming it is so worth it.
That's what I did. After being so lonely for two years, I got tired and prayed for God to help me. Meet the right man I can spend my life with. Recovering from a heartbreak seems like an impossible challenge but the rewards from overcoming it is so worth it.
@zandy985186 (434)
• China
3 Jan 09
You are right!Whether you love someone so strongly but he not belongs to you or fall in love with someone else.Learn to forget him and restart your life and make it is better than before.There is no person can not live without another.
1 person likes this
@jcj_111776 (3216)
• Philippines
5 Jan 09
It's said if you truly love someone, let them go. If they come back to you, then they are truly destined to be with you. Moving on with our lives after a heartbreak is much more challenging. But then, we come out a stronger person from that experience.
@abhi_bangal (3686)
• India
3 Jan 09
May I tell you for real? There's nothing like "I can't live without you" theory. Everyone has got his or her life and leads it. There might only be one in a lacs who really goes upto the extent of ending one's life for someone' sake. Because as they say, it takes guts to shoot a alive man. But, the one's who are in love sometimes happen to say this line as you have correctly pointed out. But that too when one is in love. As a matter of fact, I too was used to this line. And I had very very intense feelings for someone. And that time I really was so addict to this line and to that person that it was really getting difficult to live without or to live alone. Life becomes miserable at such times. But you know, one used to live before meeting such a person and keeps living even after breaking up. So, I don't think, that anyone ends one's life just for a 'simple' reason as breaking up. But yes, the first few days and months are really painful. And you know, I too have gone through the same situation as you are talking. I read your post quite carefully and I hope you too will. And that's why I completely agree with you that one can still lead a happy life even after breaking up.
As far as my case goes, I too am happily married to a very very beautiful girl who loves me more than anyone else would. And we too are expecting to be parents soon. This love makes one foget about one's past. My wife has made that happen. 
HAS YOUR HUBBY BEEN THAT SUCCESSFUL?
HAS YOUR HUBBY BEEN THAT SUCCESSFUL?@jcj_111776 (3216)
• Philippines
3 Jan 09
Hello
To answer your question first, yes. My husband has been that successful. Not only did he come to a point in my life when I was so lonely, but he made me smile again. He use to tell me that he loves giving me a reason to smile. Because he loves seeing my "different thousand kinds of smile". Now, if he's not being romantic, then I don't know what.
Second, congratulations to you and to your wife. When children enter the marriage life, it's both nerve-wracking but blissfully happy at the same time. There will be challenges ahead, but when two people are willing to be supportive of each other, then nothing is impossible for them.
And lastly, you said, "one used to live before meeting such a person and keeps living even after breaking up"is true. Those who kept on living even after a break-up are those who chose to keep going on. I guess, those who chose to end their lives have no one to give the support that they need. They have no one to turn to. That's why they easily succumb to their loneliness.
To answer your question first, yes. My husband has been that successful. Not only did he come to a point in my life when I was so lonely, but he made me smile again. He use to tell me that he loves giving me a reason to smile. Because he loves seeing my "different thousand kinds of smile". Now, if he's not being romantic, then I don't know what.
Second, congratulations to you and to your wife. When children enter the marriage life, it's both nerve-wracking but blissfully happy at the same time. There will be challenges ahead, but when two people are willing to be supportive of each other, then nothing is impossible for them.
And lastly, you said, "one used to live before meeting such a person and keeps living even after breaking up"is true. Those who kept on living even after a break-up are those who chose to keep going on. I guess, those who chose to end their lives have no one to give the support that they need. They have no one to turn to. That's why they easily succumb to their loneliness. @JenInTN (27514)
• United States
3 Jan 09
This story remind me of that Shania Twain song "It Only Hurts When I Breathe".I love that song but it's so sad. I have been the victem of heartbreak as well. I think that if I had laid down for a moment I wouldn't have got back up. You sure can't mope around life living in the past if you want to find happiness again..even if you think there's none to be found.Just when you least expect it..it will come.I'm glad you have found yours.
1 person likes this
@jcj_111776 (3216)
• Philippines
3 Jan 09
That's the hard part of going through the heartbreak. Convincing ourselves that it's not the end of everything. Telling ourselves that there's still something great to look forward to.
Do you know that I first got acquainted with my husband when we were in our teenage years? Then fate intervened and we went our separate ways. Then after six long years, we met again. And that's the start of our love story.
People who go through heartbreak and get pass it, sure deserve love the next time around. And you're absolutely right. I did find mine. That's why my husband and I both like the song "I Finally Found Someone". And in some occassions, the song by Air Supply " Two Less Lonely People in the World."
People who go through heartbreak and get pass it, sure deserve love the next time around. And you're absolutely right. I did find mine. That's why my husband and I both like the song "I Finally Found Someone". And in some occassions, the song by Air Supply " Two Less Lonely People in the World." @babyania (161)
• Philippines
3 Jan 09
wow. congratulations! just like you, i felt the same when my heart broke for the first time. but eventually, after how many months, the guy who broke my heart came back to me. i accepted him and until now, we're still together. :)
@jcj_111776 (3216)
• Philippines
3 Jan 09
Hi babyania
Thanks. And it's good to know that things between you and your guy are going smoothly. As they say, love is sweeter the second time around. He must have realized that he does truly love you and took a risk of him being rejected when he came back to you. Forgiveness is something really hard to accomplish especially when we've been hurt too deeply by the people we love.
Thanks. And it's good to know that things between you and your guy are going smoothly. As they say, love is sweeter the second time around. He must have realized that he does truly love you and took a risk of him being rejected when he came back to you. Forgiveness is something really hard to accomplish especially when we've been hurt too deeply by the people we love.
@salbahis06 (234)
• Philippines
3 Jan 09
there was one of my discussion about that line, but i just forgot the whole thing about it. there's only i thing i remembered about it, its called parasitism, because you tend to depend on the other person about your own life. [;
1 person likes this
@jcj_111776 (3216)
• Philippines
3 Jan 09
Hi
I remember someone gave me this advice. That is, when you find yourself deeply in love, love that person 90% but leave the remaining 10% for yourself. So, if the inevitable comes and break-up enters the scene, we'll still be left with a piece of ourselves.
I remember someone gave me this advice. That is, when you find yourself deeply in love, love that person 90% but leave the remaining 10% for yourself. So, if the inevitable comes and break-up enters the scene, we'll still be left with a piece of ourselves.