Feeling guilty....

@Paula1966 (1102)
United States
January 3, 2009 9:24pm CST
After visiting my mother-in-law in the hospital today (she had surgery to take out tumors in her colon on Wednesday), my husband and I were talking about how things will need to be modified when she gets discharged. He mentioned that she is probably going to need help showering (a nerve got tugged on during the surgery, according to the surgeon, and her left leg is pretty weak still). I panicked, and said I wouldn't be able to help with that because I will be at work, and perhaps her friends can be enlisted to help. It's true that I will be at work, but really I am not comfortable with that level of openness. I feel bad, but I haven't had that close of a relationship with her. I've noticed too that a lot of the "iron stomach" I built up as a young mother has worn off now that my son is almost grown, and I have become squeamish again. At what point does it absolutely become your responsibility to take care of someone else's physical needs? Is it OK to ask someone closer with the person in question to take over due to your own squeamishness?
1 person likes this
2 responses
@underdogtoo (9591)
• Philippines
4 Jan 09
I suppose we all need to do what we need to do. Sometimes, there are occasions when we have to do the things we are squeamish about. Who know? we might turn out to be good at it. Cheers!!
@AnakSuNamun (2084)
• United States
4 Jan 09
I'd say I do have an iron stomach and I'd be OK with that,especially if it was my relative. A mother-in-law can be pretty akward,though,but you should probably help her if she asked you for it,that might lead to tenseness later and helping her would be only human. I've had to help a drunk neighbor a couple of times and got blood and less pleasant substances all over my jacket. Wasn't fun but I did my good deed which doesn't happen very often