Is it right to go to a church where your ex is one of the members of this church

Philippines
January 10, 2009 11:51pm CST
There is a church near in my boarding house,and i wanna go there but the problem is that,i saw my ex there.Is it still okay if i continue in going there?i am a married woman but still young though,im 22.I told my hubby about this and he said its okay as long as i am very careful,the fact that he's very far from me coz he is in the other country now.Any advice?thanks
1 person likes this
7 responses
@fwidman (11515)
• United States
11 Jan 09
I don't see a problem, you are going into a church after all and I assume you are going because you like the service they offer or the way the minister preaches. I don't think you are going there to socialize, so there really shouldn't be a problem with your ex being there too. Besides, your ex may be wondering the same thing, should they continue to go to that church?
• Philippines
11 Jan 09
yeah,i dont see this as a problem also but the problem is that,the gf of my ex texted me last time and ask me if im still interested with her bf.I told her that i am married only and i love my husband.My only intention really is to go to church coz i like the service and most of all,i dont go there to socialize or to see my ex,i just want to hear God's word and christian music..my intention is God,not my ex.But i guess the gf of my ex just got jealous.Is she worried about this?what do u think?
@fwidman (11515)
• United States
11 Jan 09
It does seem as though she is jealous and that is too bad for her. If you feel comfortable enough with the woman you may want to have a little chat with her before church and tell her again that all you are interested in is the service and the music and God. If she has a problem with that, that's her problem, not yours
• Philippines
11 Jan 09
heheh..yeah,very good advice..thanks..
• Canada
11 Jan 09
Go to the church, sit as close to the front as possible, be the first ones in and the last ones out to avoid the awkwardness of the situation. If it is the closest church, and you don't want to switch then don't let it bother you. Ex's are just a thing in the past. If you are happy now then there is no need to worry. Think of them just as a member of the church and not a ex.
• Philippines
11 Jan 09
yes,nice advice..but he seats in front also coz he's the guitarist of the band and sometimes he's the keyboardist...
1 person likes this
• Canada
12 Jan 09
Then sit at the very back. Just stay nice and far and things should be fine.
• United States
11 Jan 09
Hi! In my opinion.......you better go to that church girl! dont let somebody take away your time with GOD. when you go in there dont even look in his direction. If i were you i would go to that church and get my praise on who cares if my ex is there. Its just me and GOD. Be careful though because your ex might try to put the moves on you because your in his church.
• Philippines
11 Jan 09
the gf of my ex is the daughter of the pastor..thanks for the advice..
@ana31798 (41)
• United States
13 Jan 09
I think you should be able to go to wherever you want to go regardless if your ex is there or not, specially church. You obviously aren't interested in him anymore and are going just because you like that church. If his gf has a problem with it that is her problem.
@oyenkai (4396)
• Philippines
13 Jan 09
I read about your comment on the first response. You should have laughed when the girlfriend sent you that text message! That was seriously embarrassing on her side and very good for you :D She's feels threatened by you even though you're already married! Girl there must be something you have that she will never have :) Be proud of yourself and stop feeling so guilty about it. There's nothing wrong with going to the same church. They don't own it! Just keep your stance, and mind your own business. You're married, it's about time you get rid of feeling embarrassed around other men :) You're practically untouchable to them :) Thank you for the response on my discussion!
@UK_Shree (3604)
12 Jan 09
I guess it just depends on how comfortable you feel around your ex. If you feel that your discomfort will get in the way of your enjoyment at church, is there not another church nearby where you could attend instead? Or on the other hand, you won't be able to avoid your exes forever, and as long as the break-up was not destructive, you might find that you feel okay about being in the same place. Maybe give it a go, once or twice, see how you feel and then decide if you want to keep going or not?
@modstar (9608)
• Philippines
11 Jan 09
Hmm.. i just hope you don't have feelings for your ex anymore because somehow his presence might influence you and who knows, you might fall for him again. But if you're over him and confident enough that you won't fall for him again, then i guess it's ok going to the church. But if he still loves you and might pursue you, then i guess you need to stay away from him especially now that you are married. You don't want to add more gossips against you, do you?