children in church

@edu4625 (188)
United States
January 12, 2009 10:58am CST
Have you noticed that this society seems to be less and less child friendly. It seems to me that children are disappearing from places I used to see them and when they cry or move around even in public places people seem to stare at them as if they're from out of space. I used to think that the church was the one place that an entire family could go and be comfortable no matter what the ages of their children were. In fact when infants would cry in the church people would smile. Now, even the churches are discouraging small children from attending. The church's solution is to offer a day care or nursery for the children. But many small children cannot adjust that quickly to being separated from their families. I think it is a rite of passage having children in church. It was a place that kids learned how to behave. Yes they were restless in church but that's how they learned how to have patience and the proper way to behave in public. If children aren't accepted in church, then where can they go? After all we were all children at one time. What do you think?
3 people like this
13 responses
@bing28 (3797)
• Philippines
13 Jan 09
It's much better bringing children to the church, while attending mass, than living them at home. I's good for them, at their young age to be used to attending the mass and hearing the words of God. They may not understand yet but at least to be aware of the practice example of the catholic faith or whatever religion. Little by little they would understand and as they they grow older they would learn the practice of going to church. I'ts up for the parents to remind the children on their proper behavior,
@rocketj1 (6960)
• United States
13 Jan 09
On one hand I agree. I think that children need to learn how to sit and behave and be respectful. But at the same time, I can remember being the child in church and I can assure you that a lot of what was going on went right over my head. In our church, the non-nursery age children stay in the service for the singing and the offering. They are then dismissed to "superchurch" where they participate in a service that is geared to their understanding. They still learn respect for their teacher and how to behave and sit still, they just are now able to get something out of it. Church shouldn't be punishment but rather a place to draw closer to God.
• United States
13 Jan 09
i go to a church that accepts all children they turn no one away
@Frederick42 (2018)
• Canada
13 Jan 09
It seems people ahve forgotten that they themselves were once children and that is why they are not friendly towards children. In order to be friendly towards children, one has to go back and remember his own childhood. Then we remember our pranks as well as how helpless we were back then and that will definitely open our outlets of friendships towards children.
• United States
13 Jan 09
I agree with you edu4625. I am a mom of a severely autistic son and have experianced a lot of intolerence because he is not one of the "perfect kids" at the churches I've tried. It's really sad.
• United States
13 Jan 09
I think that is kinda true. Church is where the whole family should be. The nursrey should let parents in there and have the little speakerphone going. Another reason why a church may not like kids there is when a child or several of them act stupid. At our church kids were running and make a old lady fall and break her hip. Alot of times parents send the kids off on the church bus and don't go or control their kids anyways. I think that if the are 5+ then they should be welcome as long as they behave. Babies, toddlers, and older should be all welcome. But the older kids need to behave. Yes some of them do behave you know it just depends.
• United States
12 Jan 09
Why should a small child be force to sit still and be quiet for an hour or more while listening to someone talk about something they do not understand? It just seems mean to me while there are other things they could be doing that involve God. This is why we have Sunday school, kids get to go and learn the same thing you are learning about God but more in their "own language".
@deebomb (15315)
• United States
12 Jan 09
The Church that I attend is very children friendly. There is nursery if a parent choses to take their small child there but most are opting to have their children sit with them during church services. That is the best way for small children to learn how to behave in church. No one minds them talking or making the noise that babies make. It is the older children that should have been taught to be still and quiet that are disruptive. The ones that are 8 or 10 and still need to have toys brought to entertain them. We have two little girls that sit int the back of one of their parents and they continually whisper and play with their dolls. That noise goes forward and is distracting. Not those little ones.
@psspurgeon1 (1109)
• United States
12 Jan 09
I am very fortunate. My church provides a nursery that is staffed with very lovely people but they are so good with kids in service. They say that they would rather hear noisy kids in church then for them to not be there at all. They are all very kind and understanding and make no one feel bad for a noisy child. I have had my fair share of loud kids in church and I always feel the need to apologise for them. Everytime I apologise for them though, everyone goes out of their way to make me feel good about my girls making a rukus. It's nice. And in public, if people want to stare at my kids if their being a little noisy, they can go somewhere else. I'm sure their kids were not always quiet, as it is the nature of children. I personally think they are a joy and I love the noises they make and their little cute voices.
@banadux (630)
• United States
12 Jan 09
Most churches usually have some place for children to go during the service. Church is not some place to teach your child to behave, well, maybe once since they should learn from the severity of punishment that they are not to do it again. If you keep a screaming child in the middle of the service such that others can't hear what is going on you are being disrespectful to those around you. Stay in the back and take them outside if a tantrum occurs.
@nchap36 (556)
• United States
12 Jan 09
Amen. You are right. If they can't hear because of the child move up. I was their with my mom, and I would like mines with me. That is a type of discipline for our kids. How to sit quietly. But everything is changing in time.
@caver1 (1764)
• United States
12 Jan 09
AT church, my children stayed in the nursery until they were 2 years old. Where I go to church now there is also a class for the pre-schoolers during the worship service. I think it is good for the pre-schoolers to sit with parents during the worship service. They learn what is going on, and learn how to behave in a public situation. But I also understand the reasoning behind the pre-school class. Some parents would just stay home and not come to church at all if they had to deal with their child during the service. The class is not mandentory. Many people keep their children with them. Some will start out with the kids in the auditorium and then bring them to class if they start getting loud.
• United States
12 Jan 09
As a mother of two young children I can see how it would be offensive to think children are not welcome. However I do believe if a child can not be quite, sit still or not be disruptive then they should not be brought to church. I think that is disrespectful though you might not agree with that. My son did not attend church until he was 8, and could respect God's house. My 4 yr old is no where near ready to attend church.