What does it mean?

United States
January 25, 2009 9:13pm CST
I have been with my husband for a few years. We haven't fooled around for a while. And that is fine by me. I just don't feel like it anymore. Not for anyone. I love him, but just don't feel sexy anymore. He acts all hurt, but he doesn't initiate it either. What does it mean? What should I do?
6 responses
• United States
26 Jan 09
I love the fact that you posted this. I have been feeling the same way lately. I just never feel like it. I don't feel sexy or wanted. Whenever I bring it up he starts things but by that point its too late. He gets mad because I never want to do it anymore. Sometimes life is just to hectic and it becomes an after thought. I'm not sure of all your circumstances, but in my case I think my mind, heart, and soul just aren't in it anymore. I get too distracted.
1 person likes this
• United States
26 Jan 09
Exactly! By the time I make it to bed, I just want to sleep.
@Trace86 (5033)
• United States
26 Jan 09
I agree with the others that you need to sit down and have a long talk with him about what is going on with both of you and how other things are intruding in your relationship. Talk about what you can do to fix it. Schedule time together to just do stuff, not sexy stuff. The intimacy will return in it's own time. Good luck!
@rosdimy (3936)
• Malaysia
26 Jan 09
In my opinion this discussion is a little bit sensitive and that was why I waited for more than eighr hours. The way I see it the spark that used to ignite your passion towards him may be missing. It does not mean you no longer love him, but the feelings may have drastically changed. Work pressure has been cited as a contributory factor. But do not people say love can overcome almost all obstacles? In one case a woman was like you. Feeling tired whenever she was at home with her husband. Too lethargic to even smile. But she became energetic with all smiles whenever she was with male colleagues, even late at night. Check yourself on this matter. Routine actions can lead to boredom. Your relationship may need variety at least once in a while. He may not want to initiate anything because of fear of rejection. I can understand his feelings. The two of you may need a long slow talk on this matter. all the best, rosdimy
1 person likes this
@yanzalong (15258)
• Indonesia
26 Jan 09
You have not mentioned whether or not your husband loves you. You probably get bored being with him for sometime. I suggest you take a holiday away for a couple of days and do something you have not done with your husband. Who knows?
1 person likes this
@nympha687 (940)
• United States
26 Jan 09
These things happen in a relationship. It has something to do with your preoccupations. My experience was I go to work, take care of our son, prepare everything needed for tomorrow and I really have no time nor energy to think about something else. It'll go back once you are freed from all these stressors. It is then better for the both of you to find time alone and away from distractions. Perhaps during weekends. Or if that's something you had to do because he is hurting, pray for passion.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
26 Jan 09
Have you tried talking with him? I fear the worst for you. Because somehow I sense that he does not want to be intimate with you if that is the case, there is a problem that must be dealt with asap so as to keep the relationship going.