I am perplexed and need your help.
By bamrahkirti
@bamrahkirti (1821)
India
January 30, 2009 4:18am CST
One of my husband's cousin is giving me trouble since the day i got married.She is very arrogant and rude and suffers from superiority complex.She thinks that she is the most beautiful woman on earth and nobody can match with her.She always come to our house but she has never ever invited me to her house.It is customary in Indian families to invite newly married couple for lunch or dinner but she has never shown interest to do so.
I complained about her attitude to my MIL who does not have the digestive system to digest my stuff and immediately told about it to my sis in law who later told the stuff to this cousin.From that day onwards she has started treating me more badly and rudely.However we invited her along with her family to my son's birthday but she did not speak to me at all and made fun of certain things which i took in a bad taste.
Now on Sunday morning there is some function at her home and she has invited all of us through MIL but i do not want to go to her house and MIL is pressurizing me to accompany them.I do not know what to do.I have asked my husband and he said that we should go for a short period but i do not want to go.
I am perplexed and cannot decide. what should i do?
Will you help me?
1 person likes this
5 responses
@smacksman (6053)
•
30 Jan 09
It sounds to me that she is consumed with jealousy for you.
If that is so then you have the upper hand and can be gracious and sympathetic to her problem.
Go to her party for a while and be very correct and polite. Then leave early 'to go to another party' but don't tell her that - tell your MIL and the word will get back.
You have more important things to do than be entertained by her!
@moondancer (7431)
• United States
30 Jan 09
Your sister-in-law seems to be an arrogant person that enjoys getting down on others and causing trouble for them. She comes to your home and treats you badly. I would go to her home and be the lady that I am not stooping to her level or lowering myself to her level.
You are apparently a better person than she is. Show her that he bad behavior does not bother you(make her think that it does not). The more you let her know that she is upseting you the better she feels about what she is doing.
If you go to her house and she acts up towards you. I would ask her to be a lady and try for the family to show she has grace.
Saying something along these lines may shock her into acting right.
You need to put in an appearance even if it's just a short time.
Be the lady that you are, be polite...but don't let her walk on you or day bad things to you.
That's what I would do.
1 person likes this
@bamrahkirti (1821)
• India
30 Jan 09
Yes you are very true.She needs to be told about her behavior.
Thanks for your valuable suggestions.
1 person likes this
@checapricorn (16060)
• United States
4 Feb 09
[i]HI bam,
I know I am late already but if I am in that situation, I will also stop hanging out with her!
ANyway, I met people like that in my previous workplace and I always avoid to do things with them![/i]
@snowy22315 (208995)
• United States
30 Jan 09
I guess that your husband's idea of going for a short time is the best one. I would tell him that you only want to stay for about half an hour or whatever you think is reasonable. Maybe she is changing her attitude toward you and you dont want to appear ungracious by not attending. I'm sure you will be able to work something out.
@rocketj1 (6955)
• United States
30 Jan 09
You cannot be responsible for HER behaviour but you are responsible for how you react to her. If you are invited, you should go. You should act friendly and just be yourself. If she is rude, continue to be pleasant. Don't sink to her level. Stay above that sort of behaviour! Have a good time with your family and don't let her ruin your day!
