If you love her then let her go?

China
February 3, 2009 6:19am CST
I think the most painful thing in the world is that two people obviously in love but can not get together.It is not I do not love her ,but because I love her so much so I leave her.I think if you can not make you love happy,might as well let her go to find out the happiness belong to herself. My girlfriend and I have been to get along for about four years.I love her,and I know she loves me too.But we seem to live in the different worlds since she became a stewardess.The busy work has been occupied all her time.We even can not see each other in a month.Daily contact with the plane and the different people,she was very pretty,and a lot of rich man love to her.And But she only love me. All her colleagues have rich boyfriend. But I am only a poor student,have not graduated form the university yet,do not know what will happen in the future.But my girlfriend does not love money,she only love me.She is willing to join me in a very hard life. I know she is a good girl. But I can not promise what she will have a happy life.I hesitated for a long time.But now I have decided to leave her. She was very sad,but I have no choice.I love her so much.I wish her happy!! I do not know whether I was right.If you love her then let her go?
4 people like this
24 responses
@brew2x (3095)
• Philippines
3 Feb 09
I will not let go of my love unless he doesn't love me or doesn't want to be with me anymore. I will hold on to my feelings no matter what. Money is not everything, it won't buy you happiness. I know money is important nowadays but as long as you keep trying and you have dreams in life then it is good enough. Did you explain to her your reason? If you just wanted her to be happy and if she is happy to be with you then I guess letting her go is not the solution. Well if you did not fight for her then it means you don't love her enough and you have been defeated by fear.
1 person likes this
• China
5 Feb 09
I want to say that I am trying my best to hard work.I want to give her a prosperous life.But I was too general,I think it is difficult for me to become successful person.And those born at a rich home coys,I and they are for worse in economically.
@TLChimes (4838)
• United States
3 Feb 09
Money doesn't make happiness (for me anyway)and love does. You shouldn't make up her mind for her. Tell her how you feel... about her work, your prospects, where your life is going and how you want her to be happy. Give her the choice to stay or go. If you love her... you will let her make up her own mind on how to live her life. Then if she stays you will do all you can to see her smile. Bring her a wild flower, sing her a silly tune, what ever it is that makes her smile... then she will be happy.
1 person likes this
• China
5 Feb 09
The reality is cruel,I would like to give her at my side and she felt very self-abased...
• Philippines
3 Feb 09
dont think for the future.. have fun.. be with her for the moment.. coz your really not sure.. if shes meant for you honey.. like say for me.. i was in a five year relationshp and it dint work out.. i was hoping it would and then i met my husband 5 months after we decide to get married.. you see? you will never know.. so think just for now.. as of the moment.. and have fun with her..
1 person likes this
• China
4 Feb 09
I think your situation is not same with.I could even not see her in a month.We are in the different city now.We just can take contact with other by the phone.And mybe every time I call her when she is working.She is so busy on her work.And she is tired every day.But I am 4 grade now.I will graduation next year.I am only a student now.I do not know what will happen in the future...
@rsa101 (24174)
• Philippines
16 Feb 09
Why would you let her go if she still professes that she still loves you. Is is because you feel inferior in front of her because she has a good job and you don't have? If she can say that she can live with you in poverty then what is is that stops you from loving her? Being poor doesn't mean you don't deserve to love her anymore. If I were you I would be happy that she professes her love to you and understand your situation and condition. I wouldn't give her up that easy because I can feel her loyalty to you despite all the things you see in yourself.
• China
17 Feb 09
But the reality is very cruel!I have no means to change the status quo. Thank you for your concern about me. Wish you have a good time here~
1 person likes this
@rsa101 (24174)
• Philippines
17 Feb 09
It is really up to you to give her up it is you who will suffer from the choices you've made. I really think if you truly love a person you would not just give up just because distance is a hindrance. For me True love doesn't end in distance and status problems. You should be inspired by it to do better your life for her and not become a victim of your own destiny.
@cathya (704)
• Philippines
5 Feb 09
ohh thats so sad! I have to agree with you that letting go is the saddest part of the relationship and it is more harder if you still love your partner. you know what, not all woman who are financially stable tend to look a partner who claims the same status as she is, i guess its so unfair for your partner to be treated that way especially if she really loves you. what you did doesn't show that you love her that you mean happiness for her, know why?? because you hurt her when you broke up with her, when you let her go you also let go of her happiness... just to share my personal experience, i can say that me and my partner are of the same situation as your. i am already working and earning my own money while my partner still on finishing his studies. most people ask me why him, you don't have future with him, you deserve someone better that him,...etc, etc, etc.... i always told him, I AM HAPPY WITH HIM, what matters to me is that I love him and he loves and were both happy...now, me and my partner is turning 3 years by 2morrow... look no one can dictate whats best for us, no one can know what makes us happy...HAPPINESS DEPENDS ALWAYS ON OUR CHOICE...if your gf knows that she will be happy with you, no matter what state of life you have, she will stay with you.... i guess you did a wrong move when you let go of your girlfriend, sorry but thats the way i look at it especially if she really loves you.
• China
5 Feb 09
Wish you having a good life with you lover,thank you for focusing me!
@cathya (704)
• Philippines
17 Feb 09
thank you for the best response mark cheers
• India
4 Feb 09
DOn't let her go like this. See you both are not happy without eachother then WHY??? If she has been with you since four years, she won't mind giving you a chance to make your career, study hard. I am sure she will support you in everyway because she loves you alot. We don't meet such people everyday. DON'T LET HER GO...!! Blessings!!
• China
4 Feb 09
Those the words i really want to express.....yep DON't let her go.EVEN GOD wouldn't allow you to do so!!!! Get her back.i am sure u'll have a happy life then.
@bing28 (3798)
• Philippines
4 Feb 09
If she loves you why then let her go. While she's there, make her an inspiration for you to strive hard, to finish your studies, find a good paying, decent job and have a better life. It's too early for you to give up on her. So what if there are rich men who loves her. What's important she loves you and you love her. If there's a problem where she has to choose between you and someone who can give her good future, but he still chooses you why give her up. You're still young and you can still make beautiful future. I think "If you love her, then let her go", doesn't apply to your case. I think yu're just having a self pity which should not be as you can still improve your life.
• China
5 Feb 09
I think I will learn to make a little strong by myself,thank you very much for giving me the suggestion.
@gracie04 (4554)
• Philippines
3 Feb 09
hey, just think of the present and be prepared for the future.. i mean, it's not too late for you to go back to school and earn a degree.. you know, the best thing you can do right now is to be with her, have fun, enjoy, make her feel loved and cared about, support her dreams and aspirations in life, etc.. it seems like your girlfriend loves you the way you do so just be grateful for that.. Don't lose hope. You can still give her a better life in the future.. Think positive! watch "the secret" and you will be enlightened..
• China
5 Feb 09
Thank you for your encouragement to me ,I think I should make a cool.. You are so kindly~
@rainfeed (10)
• Indonesia
3 Feb 09
oh man this brings back memories.. i used to be naive & coward, thinking tht running away is the solution.. u see, love is BOTH a blessing and a curse! it will always ask from you even more than u have ever given! so if u juz leave her now, then u both go ur own ways, each feeling sad & sorry & stuffs.. till one day u both forgot about it, each have some real relationships with other people & marry like nothing really happened.. then what's the good of the love u both have now??? it's nothing! if u really love her, then u should instead be thinking about how to secure a future for both of u! study, graduate, work, work, work! (don't be selfish, she might took the career as a stewardess because she's worried about future too!) if, for example, in the future u failed to provide security, but she's still with u no matter what, be proud! i would die with my loved one in hunger, embracing ourselves, if it really is our fate.. that's the greatness of love.. if, again example, in the future u failed, and she dump you for it, be proud! u will be THE ONLY ONE crying & she will juz walk away smiling with another rich guy.. that's the greatness of love.. do this: meet her the next time she land, then tell her how much u love her, then show her your hand, then say this: "i cannot promise you a happy future, but future is not here, there is only me asking u to be with me!"
• China
5 Feb 09
Right,this is really a sad story for me.Thank all of you .~~
@eichs1 (1934)
• Philippines
5 Mar 09
If you love someone, you will let her go if fate says so. But in your case, you let her go because you are not secure about your feelings for her anymore. There are no outside pressures for you to leave her. Yes there are lots of issues (as you have presented) but all of those are not enough to leave someone that you really love. What if you are still studying and she is already working? Shouldn't have this situation made you strive more to finish your studies? What if you can't see each other every month? Mind you, others are not even with their love ones for years but they were able to keep their relationship strong. Besides, there are lots of means nowadays to keep in touch with other people. I mostly regret your final reason for leaving her. You want to make her happy? So what now if you are the only person that can make her happy? Do you think you made the right decision?
@JenInTN (27546)
• United States
6 Feb 09
Yes I agree in letting her go..but only if she wants to. She needs to be able to choose her future too. She may be happy living in a cardboard box as long as it's with you. I think you should give yourself more credit. Money is not everything to everybody. You must have a lot to offer if she loves you and wants to be with you. We can only do what we think is right at the time. Good luck.
@maean_19 (4660)
• Philippines
5 Feb 09
Basing on your discussion, I think you did the right thing. Time will tell if you are really for each other. Finish your course, get rich and have a good life. When you are through, return to her and if she still loves you, that means you are destined with each other. Nowadays, we have to be practical. It isn't love alone that builds a relationship. Think of the future for you and your family to be. Good luck!
@zandi458 (27948)
• Malaysia
5 Feb 09
Boy, you pierce my heart deeply. Why do you cut short your love for the girl who really love you? This is cruel of you. Wealth is nothing compared to a true love and you know how painful it is for her to pass the days without you? I know you love her and let her go but if she comes back to you, will you take her back? Afterall it is no fault of hers that you are separated.
• China
5 Feb 09
Yes,if you love her,you will give her happiness,not occupy her.
• Philippines
4 Feb 09
Oh no! You should not have done that. The fact that she did not choose those wealthy men, means your status is not a problem for her. You are lucky she loves you that much. I had a similar case with you. But I regretted it in the end. I realized that all the things that I thought would be "the problems" in the relationship turned out be not a problem. However your case is better than mine and you can still repair it. Your love for her should push you to try harder and it would be easier if someone supports you. IF IT IS NOT TOO LATE, GET BACK WITH HER. Let time decide what will happen. Do not cut your relationship short because of some little "complications"..Love should be able to help you conquer them. This may sound corny but it is true. I've seen how this works for many relationship. Sticking with each other regardless. I know a couple who the girl came from a rich family who fell in love with a poor man. They got married. The girl did not mind selling in the market as she seemed happy with her man. This is a true case. Now, the man is a good cook so business is doing OK; the girl is there with him despite that girl was not even allowed in the kitchen because she has maids to do it for her. Learn from my mistake and this example. Goodluck!
• United States
4 Feb 09
"If you love them, set them free, if they return, it was meant to be.." Something to that extent. Sometimes though, I think it might be interpreted as giving up on someone, not so much as caring for them to the extent you want them to have a better life. It is sweet that you want the best for her, but make sure she knows that as well. Money is not everything. Feeling comfortable, safe and happy with the one you are in love with is priceless. If you are certain that she loves you and is uninterested in others, letting her go may not of been in her best interest.
@Crocket (315)
• Canada
4 Feb 09
Hello guchuang, Crocket here. I think that you have done the best that you could in this paricular circumstance. It seems to me when we do love more than we should we ultimately end up on the losing end of the stick. Why, I remember being so jealous over a girl friend that I wanted to beat her. But I didn't , I just left. I found out years after that she hadn't been cheating on me anyway but I thought that she was with the rich guy. Crocket.
• China
4 Feb 09
Since you've said your girlfriend doesn't love money and she only loves you.So why do you leave her? Now you leave her ,is she happier than the days she spent with you? she mustn't be happy with money,rich guys or sth but only you.according to your expessions ,i suppose she is really something. maybe you wish you could give the world to her ,but love is all you have to give. if i were you ,i wouldn't give up.coz i know only the love can make her happy indeed.
@Tinna_He (300)
• China
4 Feb 09
your girlfriend love you.If she doesn't love you,why does she stay with you.she can accept the persuit of rich people.we live for love not the money.Now you are a student,you can study hard and get great achievement in order to get a good job.you should work hard for your future life.It will be a happy life when you and your girlfriend build a home by yourselves.Please love your pretty girl.
• Philippines
4 Feb 09
I dont think so, if you love her then dont let her go. I dont think she would like you to be far from her.