Don't yell at the child when it's your fault

@dawnald (85129)
Shingle Springs, California
February 3, 2009 11:09am CST
'Hypothetical' scenario: Parent is nude and ready to get in shower. Door is wide open and child walks into room. Parent yells at child and says, "get out and close the door." Then later parent gets out of shower and says, "did I yell loud enough?" This said in tone like, "I done good huh?" Seems to me parent was wrong and should apologize to child. My reasoning? If the parent wanted the child to say out, the parent should have shut the door. Door open = come in Door closed = stay out Logical?
4 people like this
12 responses
@mysdianait (66009)
• Italy
3 Feb 09
Absolutely agree! I remember when my son was tiny round about two years old. Welived in a house withn an upstairs and downstairs and the bathroom was upstairs. One day Iwent up to the bathroom and he was playing with his toys happily. When I cam down after about ten miutes he was trampling on my record albums (33 vinyls for those too young to know). He had removed about ten from their covers and they were all over the floor like stepping stones! I didn't scream at him - I stifled it as long as I could just staring. It wasn't his fault to know they weren't for that use. It was mine for not keeping them up higher where he couldn't reach I am well aware that it is too easy to blame our kids for things they are not responsable for. I have already warned my son in advance that his low-level television will make a perfect race-track for my granchildren's toy cars if it is still there where it is now
2 people like this
@dawnald (85129)
• Shingle Springs, California
3 Feb 09
Yep he's asking for it! lol
2 people like this
@mysdianait (66009)
• Italy
3 Feb 09
Yup!
2 people like this
@checapricorn (16061)
• United States
3 Feb 09
H[i]i dawn, I agree with you...LOL! But, I know there are times parents will just make some excuse and put the blame in the kids which is totally unfair! [/i]
2 people like this
@dawnald (85129)
• Shingle Springs, California
3 Feb 09
Embarrassment or whatever, but I would hope that the parent would be big enough to realize they are wrong and apologize later.
1 person likes this
@ElicBxn (63194)
• United States
4 Feb 09
your right - duh - you don't want the child to see something - shut the door! Heck, I shut the door if I want to keep the CATS out. why? well, Rygel will attack me thru the shower curtain and that does NOT feel good!
1 person likes this
@ElicBxn (63194)
• United States
4 Feb 09
I also worry about a few of them doing rude things to my shoes, that I leave in the bathroom because the cats are apt to do rude things in anything they preceive to be a bowl, cup or other thing they might be able to get their bottoms involved in... Like this for example.... http://www.twolumps.net/d/20090130.html
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85129)
• Shingle Springs, California
4 Feb 09
Oh that's funny.... Why is it that my cats like to walk on me and instead of me seeing the handsome side (the face), it's the other end that I have to look at?
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85129)
• Shingle Springs, California
4 Feb 09
The cats are always allowed in. Unless I really need to sleep...
1 person likes this
@rocketj1 (6955)
• United States
3 Feb 09
I would think the first exclamation may have been said in shock. Sometimes I yell at my kids if I'm startled. But the second statement?..........Were they joking maybe?
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85129)
• Shingle Springs, California
3 Feb 09
No, stupid male thinking...
1 person likes this
@rocketj1 (6955)
• United States
3 Feb 09
aaahh.....
1 person likes this
@AbbeyB (670)
• Spain
4 Feb 09
Totally agree I always leave the door open but if I want to have privacy then the door gets shut.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85129)
• Shingle Springs, California
4 Feb 09
Now see, common sense. Why doesn't everybody have it?
1 person likes this
@AbbeyB (670)
• Spain
5 Feb 09
God in all my years I have never been told I have common sense lol it is a very proud moment for me
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85129)
• Shingle Springs, California
5 Feb 09
Since it's such a rare thing, enjoy it while you can! lol
@hildas (3031)
5 Feb 09
Yes. The door should of been locked if they where changing. I would kill my hubby if he done this on my daughters. It's maybe not so bad for me. But I still close the door over. Some people are stupid though and do not think, but maybe accidents happen, but they should not blame the poor child.
@dawnald (85129)
• Shingle Springs, California
5 Feb 09
I didn't kill him, but I did beat him severely about the head. Sometimes guys just don't "get it"...
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85129)
• Shingle Springs, California
5 Feb 09
It was a shock reaction and now he's shutting the dang door but poor kid she was embarrassed and then gets treated like it was her fault. I think he owes her a present or something.
1 person likes this
@hildas (3031)
5 Feb 09
Stupid Men Well accidents do happen everyday and it was probably just a shock reaction. Ha bet his heads sore.
1 person likes this
@cripfemme (7698)
• United States
4 Feb 09
I agree and your smart, but many parents don't apply logic and just yell because they have power and can. You're one smart mom.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85129)
• Shingle Springs, California
4 Feb 09
I am a very logical person. :-)
1 person likes this
@twoey68 (13627)
• United States
4 Feb 09
Sounds about right to me. We don't have kids but when my niece and nephew stay over we always make sure to close and lock the bathroom door b/c we don't want anyone walking in...heck, I sleep in my nightshirt and shorts just in case they need me in the middle of the night. [b]~~AT PEACE WITHIN~~ **STAND STRONG IN YOUR BELIEFS**[/b]
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85129)
• Shingle Springs, California
4 Feb 09
yeah, duh!
@p1kef1sh (45681)
5 Feb 09
But surely children are there to be shouted at. That's their job! If you don't shout at them then they will probably grow up to be deeply psychologically disturbed and eat too much chocolate and visit shrinks and stuff. Those poor poor children. Growing up not to know the fearsome sound of an annoyed parent.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85129)
• Shingle Springs, California
5 Feb 09
Excellent use of sarcasm! A ++++++
@yuna15 (2706)
• Philippines
8 Feb 09
Definitely logical! You're right! A parent should know when to accept their own mistakes. I noticed that parents are sometimes to proud to admit that. Even if it's obvious that it was their own mistake. I also read in the Dr. Phil's website, we should avoid yelling at the kids whether they did something or not because there is also a tendency for a child to yell back at their parents. Sometimes it's easier for the kid to remember the parent's yell rather than what they were trying to say.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85129)
• Shingle Springs, California
9 Feb 09
Yes and the child is particularly going to remember it if the parent was wrong!
• Philippines
4 Feb 09
You gave a very logical reasoning for this. Parents should not be afraid to say sorry if it was their mistakes done over a child. It is not because they are parents they shouldn't respect the child.They should be good role models to their children by doing this they should do what is right so that children will lean from it. I just hope all parents are looking things on your perspective. thanks for bringing this up.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85129)
• Shingle Springs, California
4 Feb 09
I'm logical but the other half isn't always...
@cynthiann (18602)
• Jamaica
3 Feb 09
Absolutely. The parent should have closed the door if he/she wanted privacy. My husband used to bathe our sons every evening until they reached about 6 or so. At that age they started to demand privacy. He would always check them for ticks if they had been in the cow pasture or bush. I always bathed our daughter and when she was young we sometimes bathed together. Every house has its own rules I guess. Yep- father was wrong
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85129)
• Shingle Springs, California
3 Feb 09
Yep, somebody was wrong and hopefully there will be some apologizing going on...