Grandma over stepping?

@miccant (154)
United States
February 5, 2009 10:23am CST
I dont consider my self a strict mother, but I do expect my children to listen and do as they are told. When we go to my mother inlaws house everytime I tell my son to do some thing or I get on to him his grandma will say something like "oh leave my baby alone or you can do it honey" The biggest problem is she doesn't understand that I feel my children should have the same rules no matter where we are. I have tried to tell her but still she says that is her right as a grandma. How can I get her to understand that I am the mom and I have to have some kind of control? Am I wrong or what?
1 person likes this
1 response
@AmbiePam (51165)
• United States
5 Feb 09
You're not wrong. Is your relationship with your mother-in-law good other than that? Because if so, maybe you could speak to her privately and explain, perhaps even make it sound humorous that you really need to stick to your discipline everywhere you go, even if it is the grandma that the kids love. I know I'm telling you this and I have no idea how hard or delicate the situation is when dealing with a mother-in-law, but I do know one thing for sure; you are not wrong.
1 person likes this
@miccant (154)
• United States
5 Feb 09
Thanks for your reply. I have tried to talk to her and my husband tried. It is almost getting to the point where Im not going to let the kids go over there anymore. But she is the only grandma they have left so I am confused on what to do.
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Feb 09
i know how you feel. i get a double dose of this from my mom and mil. sometimes i dont even feel like my sons mother. they say the same thing. i tell my mom that im his mother and she just has to deal with it. simple as that. but when im not there its a different story. i mean when im not there it dont bother me but when i am he has to do what i say. you are not wrong. he is YOUR child not hers and she should respect you more than than that. My mil is like that too. we cant get on to him without starting some sort of conflict. and they live across the road! yea... you could just say look, i understand that you love him and want him to have alot freedom here but when im present please back off and let me handle him because it really hurts me when you do this. it can also cause your son to run to her and play you against one another. it is aweful!! if that dont work get your hubby to say someting. i understand she is the only gma. but he is your son and she should really respect that. i hope things work out..