Friendship that breaks.....
By maean_19
@maean_19 (4656)
Philippines
February 13, 2009 1:30am CST
I am very angry and so mad about my "friend"....She became my friend when I met her at work. It continued even I resigned to that Company...However, the friendship is breaking because of my losing trust towards her. She had been my intermediary when I planned to buy a cellphone from her friend. The agreement was that the cellphone will be paid in 6 months installment, but the cellphone be given after the initial downpayment. Four months had passed, I had paid the downpayment and 2 monthly installments, yet the cellphone was not delivered. On the 5th month, I told my friend to cancel the transaction and requested for refund since I have been continiously paying and waiting for the delivery, but nothing has been done. It has been 2 months after I canceled the transaction, I never received any refund. She always tell me, I have not seen my friend or texted or am busy, etc. That was her usual alibis.
Another situation is that, my friend asked me last October 2008 to be her partner in a "Christmas business". She requested me to lay down 10 gran, but i declined because that is too much and am not actually convinced about the business she wants to enter in. Then, by November, she told me to lay down 2 gran and promised me that the capital will be returned by December 16. When Dec. 16 came, she reasoned out many things then promised another date again and again. It's February and then, am still waiting. She promised that she will give it on February 13, same with the refund. It's February 13 and she told me that the cp seller had a problem so she can't give my refund. That was her alibi now. My question now is where's her personal debt? I am tired with her alibis. What I also hate is she has other issues trying to convince me to pity her.
I do not want our friendship to break, but my trust to her is going away because of her own act or omission. She is also putting words into my mouth, telling our friends that I said this thing, in truth when I am not.
Can I still continiously trust her? Or it is time to break the friendship? What can you say?
2 people like this
7 responses
@michaeldadona (5684)
• Malaysia
13 Feb 09
There are three (3) major questions that really able to make you turn new leaf on her and make money from her, not just get back your money from her without her knowing about that but more than that. Before I answer your question, kindly knock hardly on your left knee cap? Do you feel the pain? Meaning that every action there is reaction.
Yes, you can still trust her in the sense that you must create new conventional or digital products online business and she must be your sub-ordinate or a.k.a. downline. All online payment goes to your PayPal payment gateway and you're the one who is going to pay her commission. Normally, flowers like much the rain water.
Break up means you're closing the book and a matter of fact, you not yet get back your money and it is far from win-win situation. Downs her eyes and heart by your feasible business plan and money, as she always did talking about her failure business during her past time. So, now is your turn to use her energy in getting back your money.
What can I say?. This is my say;
From this point of your life story, actually, it encourage you to be a great internetpreneur. What is an entrepreneur?. An entrepreneur is innovation driven who also synthesizes both; businessman and manager. Who is a businessman? A business is profit driven. Who is a manager?. A manager is management skills driven.
Your life story between you and her is a starting point for you how to fully utilize the principle of business in "Not To Own But To Control", like what Kentucky Friend Chicken(KFC) applied in its franchisor and franchisee system. Franchisor does not own franchisee's business ownership and not on partnership agreement, but wholly control the franchisee's business operation while collecting money in each transaction made by franchisee. Not just that, franchisee got to buy and pay the franchise upfront and fee money to the franchisor.
Some sorts of mentor and mantee business application system. Mentor does not own mantee's activity but to control and being paid. You can make money from her as she does has her own business connection which will be automatically your network and she does not have any executive or authoritative status, as you're the business owner.
1 person likes this
@maean_19 (4656)
• Philippines
13 Feb 09
Hi Michael, thanks for always responding to my discussions.
Honestly, with regard to your response, I would say, I won't deal with her. Know why? She has an attitude and tendencies of inventing stories. I won't do business with her.
I appreciate your effort and intention to save the friendship, but this I tell you....When you get hurt, the reaction is to stay back and don't allow the hurt to come again. With the situation, I was hurt because I trusted her SO MUCH that I have to save her from her debts from others. That I have to expect with her promises ending up empty handed and my plans for my money were not pursued. I was hurt that she is telling our friends stuff against me behind my back.
NOW TELL ME, do I still deserve her?
I am not saying that I will tell her to call the friendship quit. What I meant is that I cannot tolerate her to abuse my generosity and kindness to her. Since my trust is gone, if she will get angry (as she already did) I can sacrifice the friendship to lose it than saving it when my heart is already broken.
Do not worry, money can be found. Besides, I won't allow her not to pay me back. If circumstances will persist me to exhaust all remedies, I will do it.
I could forgive her, but my TRUST is gone.
1 person likes this
@michaeldadona (5684)
• Malaysia
13 Feb 09
Very very good as you already got your own reasonable fact not to trust her. Trust is just like thrust power to make one plane take off and stable on its route, once no more thrust it happened just like US Airways(Cactus) safely landing onto Hudson River frigid water and today's Buffalo Air Crash Continental Flight 1507: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UzUUH1tn-lc
But, according to some of the body language tips regarding your past three (3) times giving her chances, OK ~ try to touch your earlobe, if it is soft and not hard, meaning that you're really a generous person and might fall back for her low comeback...hahaha!...this is old folks saying and I found it very true. Unless, you got a pair of hard earlobes. No chance for her anymore.
Frankly speaking and not a prank talking, you're the owner of your own life story. As you've done your very best to and for her, three (3) times already, you can veto her with your deadlock decision and no more for de facto.
Be good to yourself and shines good for your life. Happy Weekend!.
1 person likes this
@jd107nette (1454)
• Philippines
13 Feb 09
wow...
With the situation you've said, in my personal opinion, I think it's about time to break the friendship. Mutual trust and respect are important elements of friendship and of any other kinds of relationship.. Do you think she gave you that, with what she did to you? I don't think so. If she doesn't respect you and you doubt her, cutting the bonds is the only option you have... (make sure you get your refunds before that! ^_-)
@messageme (2821)
• United States
14 Feb 09
2 gran! I would take her to civil court! That is a lot of money and if she agreed to pay you back then she better pay you back! I would not be her friend seems all she and her other friend have done is suck money out of you! That is not a friendship!
1 person likes this
@zhuhuifen46 (3483)
• China
14 Feb 09
However close you are with somebody, it is better to follow normal way of transaction. Here in china, we have the saying that even with brothers you have to accomplish clearance for a deal. Friendship is one thing, but it should not be mixed with with business, or deals, unless between borrower and lender.
From the cases you describe, it is time to have a settlement, at most give her a chance to explain. I do not think she has a reasonable excuse.
Keep happy, clouds should not shade the blue sky.
1 person likes this
@killhawaii (112)
• United States
14 Feb 09
I think your friend might be trying to rip you off. She might not be a real friend and just might be trying to scam you by calling you as her friend. I have met people like that, who just want to use others for and make some money off of them. Although I had my parents who warned me against them and I took their advice. I suggest you end your relationship with her and do everything to get your money back. You might have to threaten her by saying that you will call the cops but you gotta do what is necessary.
1 person likes this
@Anora_Eldorath (6028)
• United States
14 Feb 09
There is an old saying "Never a lender nor a borrower be", and there is truth in that. Friendships in which one friend is always taking from the other are not balanced, and they can become toxic. You have a choice here. You can walk away or you can set boundaries. I would not personally loan a friend that sum of money. It can really create issues.
1 person likes this
@anne25penn (3305)
• Philippines
14 Feb 09
You can still be friends with her, but it will not involve money anymore. Why do I have this funny feeling that your "friend" is like someone I know? Anyways, we can all forgive and forget, maybe she is in a financial dilemma and she is not letting anyone know. It will still be up to you if you want to continue being friends.
