Should children be on social networking sites?

United States
February 19, 2009 8:48pm CST
This is a question that came up in my communication class as well. We were discussing a parent who said their child was allowed on a social networking site because if she didn't go on she'd not be popular at school any longer. I personally thought it a poor excuse on the parent's end. I do not agree with children being on social networking sites, and especially if they are unsupervised by parents. There is too much that could occur, and I personally as a parent wouldn't feel safe letting my child roam around a social networking site. I also feel that they are exposed to a great deal in the online world. Even with mature content set, there is far too much they could see on such sites. I think back to a recent case involving a young woman who was taken advantage of by a college boy pretending to be a high school student. Or the parent who didn't like this girl at her daughters school and harrassed her on a social networking site pushing the young lady over the mental edge to commit suicide. What do you feel about this issue? Should children be allowed on social networking sites? How do you handle this as a parent? Do you monitor what your children are doing by sitting next to them or by reading up on them? Do you feel children are creating two profiles, one for parents and one for friends? How do you feel social networking sites should handle this? How do we protect our children if they do frequent social networking sites?
1 person likes this
8 responses
@twoey68 (13627)
• United States
20 Feb 09
I don't have kids but my niece and nephew come over often and they like to play online. I sit with them the whole time. There are way too many perverts and monsters out in cyberspace to just let them wander around alone. That 10 year boy they may be talking to could very well be a 40 year old child molester. I'd rather be safe then sorry. [b]**AT PEACE WITHIN** ~~STAND STRONG IN YOUR BELIEFS~~[/b]
2 people like this
• United States
20 Feb 09
Thank you for sharing. Yes, there are too many weird people online that I too think it is best to error on the side of caution. I'm glad to know I'm not alone in sitting with my kids when they are online. Thank you again, Anora
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
20 Feb 09
I am very wary of social sites when it comes to children, My daughter is seven and last Christmas she received a Bratz gift pack that contained a USB cable, a pink mouse and pad and a special "key". The ides is to register with a particular Bratz site using the key and getting introduced in a fun world of games and social networking just like Facebook, but for kids. There you can have a profile, add friends and send messages. The message part concerned me, what if an adult registers impersonating a child and arranges a meeting or something? Fortunately this particular one only uses preset messages such as Do you want to be friends? Or I like you page etc... So to my relief it is quite safe and I have allowed her to participate. I don't leave her alone while she is on the computer and I have installed software that will block inappropriate content. I would be very careful before allowing your child to be involved in online activities and sites such as Facebook, MySpace etc... should be out of bounds until they are 18 in my opinion.
• United States
20 Feb 09
It's really scary the stories out there about kids mislead on the internet. As an adult I'm even leary of other adults because online anyone can say they are anything. I think the danger triples with children. They are our gifts, and we need to be responsible. I've spoken with some other adults before and we really feel that a lot of the social networking sites would benefit from a one time credit card charge to sign up. This way if a child does sign up without their parent's knowledge at least the parent would see it on the credit card bill and be able to put an end to it. Of course, this digresses slightly into the bullying being caught on film and put up on youtube by today's youth. Definately scary.
@dawnald (85135)
• Shingle Springs, California
21 Mar 09
I posted a blog that my daughter had written over on Yuwie and Multiply and she was so jazzed by the responses that she wanted me to let her sign up for her own account. But she was only 11 at the time (12 now) and even though she really has her head on straight, I wouldn't allow it. Too young. I will probably allow it when she's 14 if she's still got it all together, but I will supervise it. Our children are too precious for us to be careless with their safety.
1 person likes this
• United States
22 Mar 09
So agreed!! Thanks for sharing. Namaste-Anora
@oyenkai (4394)
• Philippines
19 Mar 09
I think that peer pressure is a terrible thing. However, plainly saying no or reasoning with children is pretty difficult in their sensitive stage - they tend to resent being controlled and feeling constricted with rules. The way to go I think is to show them that you trust them and that they should trust you - one parenting magazine said that they shouldn't have a computer in their room. Instead, put it in the part of the house where everyone passes by - like near the dining, where the monitor is facing the table itself. In that way, they would be less tempted to do "stupid things" :) You won't be obviously watching them over their shoulders, but you'd be able to check on them once in a while :) Some parents also make sure that they're "Friends" with their children in the same social networking site and that they receive notifications of their posts and such :) Thanks for the response on my discussion!
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Mar 09
I agree, we keep our pc in the living room and that's where it will always be as our childrne get older and need to use it. And to be honest, I will know who all my children's friends are. I'd rather have a house full of kids then not know what my kids are doing or where they are at. Namaste-Anora
• United States
25 Feb 09
Hi Anora, I wouldn't allow kids under 12 on networking sites,but I think that teens could learn social and communication stills from networking.I do think it needs to be supervised .(Truth is,that mature content in pop culture is everywhere)I would like to be able to talk to 'em about that stuff. I know some are rolling their eyes now....LOL!...The thing is,I can't shelter 'em from everything.
1 person likes this
• United States
25 Feb 09
Make that "communication skills "....lol...(see what I mean )
1 person likes this
• United States
26 Feb 09
"Does this make more sense?" Nah,I don't want schools supervising(That would be my job as a parent)
1 person likes this
• United States
26 Feb 09
Flame- I agree that a well supervised experience could be fruitful, such as a social networking site set up by the school for their students only and teachers. Does this make more sense? I don't think that adult sites with no supervision of who your children are speaking to is safe. I agree, we can't shelter them, but we can protect them. Namaste-Anora
• United States
25 Feb 09
It is a poor excuse. Children are cruel and mean little beings. I work as a juvenile intake officer and see day in and day out what kids are capable of. Kids will rag on another child for wearing the wrong shoes or the wrong jeans. Children will find any reason to ridicule and pick on another child for any reason to make themselves feel better. I do not plan on letting my daughter be a part of any thing like MySpace or Facebook unless her father AND I have full access to her accounts. Right now, she's not even a year old yet but in the future, that's going to be a rule we have for her as well as any other children we may be blessed with. Parnets who get a computer and plop it in the child's room without the slightest idea of what is going on need to be punished. All parents should have a knowledge of their child's email accounts and passwords as well as any forums, blogs or social sites that their child belongs to. Children should not be on the computer unsupervised and the computer should be in a communal area such as the kitchen or the living room so parents can see who their child is talking to and what they are doing on the Internet.
1 person likes this
• United States
12 Mar 09
Thanks for the BR. No, parents don't think. Each and every parent believes their child could never do anything to warrant me arresting them. It's part of our jobs as parents to think that eventually it might happen or it could happen. I don't judge parents as a general rule when I arrest kids. Yeah, there are some real tools out there who should have had a forced sterilization years ago, but most of the first time offenders just made a bad choice and the punishment they receive at home will outweigh any I could ever enforce. Then we've got the kids that need to be buried *under* the jail. Those kids don't have parents or those are the kids that will wind up sharing a cell with mama or daddy when they get out of the juvenile stage of their lives.
1 person likes this
• United States
12 Mar 09
I just have to shake my head at it all, you know. All we can do is to continue to do our best. Thanks again and you're welcome on the BR. Namaste-Anora
• United States
25 Feb 09
Mystic- Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts from the point of view of the law. Sometimes I think parents just don't "think", you know? Our kids from my current marriage are very small but we don't plan on letting them on the pc unless we're right beside them. End of story. I'm glad I'm not the only parent out there doing this. Namaste-Anora
1 person likes this
@deejean06 (1952)
• United States
12 Mar 09
Thankfully I have many years before my son will even know how to use a computer much less the internet. But I do not agree that children should be allowed on such sites. I don't even go on those sites - why on earth would I let my child use them? And as for the popularity issue - that's bunk. There is too much evil which comes from these sites directed towards children. I'd much rather have my child alive, well and unpopular than the most popular child in school and...
• United States
12 Mar 09
Dee- Thanks for responding. I so agree with you! I mean, there is just too many dangers in the online world and if we as parents are to protect our children why on earth would we put them in a dangerous situation? Namaste-Anora
• United States
19 Mar 09
I agree with the response above about being 16 years old. There really is no reason to be on a social networking site when you're younger than that. Kids are far too impressionable and naive. They trust way too easily. I don't have children yet, but I wouldn't allow them to access these social sites before 16, and even then, I would make sure they keep their profile set to private (like on myspace) so no one can access their information with out their permission. I would also check their account frequently to see who they are talking to and what info they're sharing. I'd be sure to teach them the importance of safety on the internet, that it's not just a game. If they HAD to be a part of the social network, they would have to follow these rules or forfeit computer priviledges! I myself have accounts with social networking sites. They are very helpful to me with keeping in touch with my relatives and friends. I agree with that purpose of the sites. As for getting on and trying to get a buddy buddy with complete strangers, I think that is ridiculous. That's when people, mostly kids, get in trouble.
• United States
19 Mar 09
Exactly, there is just too much that kids can get into online when not supervised. And there are way too many crazy people out there. I agree with keeping their sites private. My sister-in-law's daughters are on Myspace to keep up with family but their profiles are private. Namaste-Anora