Take me as a child...
By candy811123
@candy811123 (334)
China
March 3, 2009 5:11am CST
It is really a problem that troubles me.My husband is 5 years older than me. I think 5 years is not a gap for us.But why he always takes me as a child? He asks me to drink or eat on time;he reminds me dont stay online so long;he also tells me what should do and what shouldn't do.There are also many examples.I know it is a kind of concern,but I am not a child. If I told him that don't take me as a child,he should be upset.what should I do?
7 responses
@dhaumya (106)
• India
3 Mar 09
I won't go into the depths of psychology to explain it to you but in brief I tell you that something called parent ego state is dominant in the personality of some people. It becomes their tendency to behave like parents. you must have some adults who have childish behavior, they have a dominance of child ego state, that is all. So don't get worried too much!
@candy811123 (334)
• China
3 Mar 09
Your response looks so professional.I always think that if i should talk with him about this problem deeply in order to make him know that I can take care of myself.
It is really a problem for.Have a Good day.
@Ravenladyj (22904)
• United States
3 Mar 09
I would worry if its upsetting me...why shouldnt she worry...its demeaning if its not welcomed. Its one thing to be dominant in a relationship but to that degree is something completely different
@dhaumya (106)
• India
3 Mar 09
I never said that you should not talk to him. Do talk to him but keep my analysis at the back of your mind and you may even use it while talking to him. Another golden rule for happy marriages (Friendships too) "Always try to discuss and never keep anything in your mind" and you know it works like a safety valve of a pressure cooker! Thanks to be frank.
@cathya (704)
• Philippines
3 Mar 09
hi, you know as different persons as we are, we also have different ways of showing our love, may be its your husband's way of showing you how much he cares and loves you.
@cathya (704)
• Philippines
4 Mar 09
you can start your conversation by telling him that you appreciate his concern, his love, but sometimes you feel that he treats you as a child.
you can let him know how you feel in a very nice way, in manner that he won't feel that what his doing for you is useless.
you can do it! cheers!
@candy811123 (334)
• China
3 Mar 09
I can understand your point.But I just want to make him know my feeling without hurt him.If I told him that I really don't want to be taken as a child, could he feel depressed?
Have a happy day!
@daliaj (5674)
• India
3 Mar 09
You please talk to him how you fell about these things and try to change him. He will have some things to tell him about his behavious like he wants to take care of you a lot and feel you good all times. I think he loves to take care of you. I would like to have a husband like yours. My husband doesn't take care of me much.
@candy811123 (334)
• China
3 Mar 09
I think your husband just want to make you feel free.You know while I browsing the websites or do something online,I am afraid that he coming in suddenly and asking me to close the laptop to do have a rest.What a pity!
@forslahiri (1042)
• India
3 Mar 09
Hi,
How can you be so NEGATIVE?(even Childish...)?
In every instance, It's His Love depicts...
Take & respond to His 'Love' maturely,then only U can prove ....
=Lahiri,Kolkata,India.
@tjsally (287)
• China
4 Mar 09
Speak from another angle, you are happy woman. Your hunsband love you so deeply that he concern your life very carefully. Expressions of loving is different from each person. That's his own way of expression. You could only know he really love you, that's ok. If you really couldn't endure him, you could tell him in a gently way.
@Ravenladyj (22904)
• United States
3 Mar 09
So why are you putting up with it? What should you do? Put him in his place and let him know that under no circumstances will you allow him to parent you any more. You wanted a husbnad NOT a father and he is out of line. Let him know that you are a grown woman and you do NOT appreciate his attitude towards you and that how he treats you is putting a strain on your relationship.
